He shook his head. "Not with me, but with who they think I am, and what they think I can offer. It gets old after a while."
"I bet it does. While I'm no musician, I know what it feels like to be marginalized. Randy, my deceased husband, loved that I cleaned and cooked and did laundry, but he …" She swallowed hard, and he worried she would choke on the words. "He obviously didn't think I was good in bed or his tastes were different than what I offered because he cheated." Her eyes grew wide. "You're the second person I've ever told, but did you hear that story about the man who got his … you know … bit off in a car accident?"
"Who hasn't, it was international news." His eyes grew wide. "That was your husband?"
Her lips pressed into a thin line. "It was so embarrassing."
"His stupidity is not a reflection on you. He was an idiot for cheating and a bigger one for getting his dick bit off."
Something worried her. He saw it in the way her eyes dulled.
"Maybe it all comes back to me. If I'd been better for him, he wouldn't have had to look elsewhere."
If Randy weren't already six feet under, he'd be happy to send him there. "Did you wait until marriage before you had sex?" He didn't want to call it making love because thinking about Mercy loving anyone but him didn't sit right.
"No. I'm not a prude."
"You certainly don't kiss like a prude. Was the marriage sex good?"
"I thought it was good for him. I mean … he always … you know."
"But did you?" Part of him wanted her to say never because that meant he'd be able to give her something her former husband didn't or couldn't.
"There was one time, but it seemed like a fluke."
He wanted to throw his fists in the air, but she didn't need his arrogance. What she needed was his reassurance.
"It wasn't you. Some men don't know when they have a good thing. They ruin it searching for something better, but it's rarely out there."
"Is that what you did? Were you looking for something better?"
He shook his head. "No, I wasn't looking for anything until I found you."
Chapter Thirteen
Mercy nearly swooned at that statement. Alex Cruz was one smooth operator.
"I bet you say that to all the girls."
He sat back and seemed to study her. With a shake of his head, he said, "Nope, I've only said it to you, but there's one other girl I could say it to, and the words would hold."
Her heart sank. For once, she would like to be the only one. "Maybe you should tell her."
He grinned. "Are you jealous?"
Yes, she was. It was a ridiculous emotion. You either had the heart of a man, or you didn't.
"No, I'm not."
"Liar."
She rolled her eyes. This was becoming their game, but she'd play along. "Okay, it's not that I'm lying, it's that I'm embarrassed to admit that I like you more than I want to."
He lifted a brow. "You don't want to like me?"
"I already like you. It's trust that I'll struggle with."
"My career isn't the kind that will give you peace of mind, but don't bury your heart with your dead husband."
He was right, and she knew it, but how could she trust a man who had a string of groupies at every venue?
"Look, I'm making more of this date than it probably is, and I apologize."
He took her hand in his. "Though I'm not ready to buy the ring, this is a real date. Not a ploy to get you naked and in my bed. If I just wanted someone between the sheets, I don't need to wine and dine them. I've got twenty new lingerie pieces to prove it, but you know which are my favorite?"
"I don't want to know."
"Yes, you do, because they are a pair of pink cotton panties."
She pulled her hand away and covered her face. "So embarrassing."
"So cute." He waved the waiter over to pay the bill. "I hate to cut our date short, but I've got the other girl I didn't know I was looking for until she found me, waiting. She has a strict bedtime, or she gets cranky."
As fast as her heart sank, it rose like pretty colored helium balloons were attached to it.
"Maddie is a lucky girl."
"Nah, I think it's me who's lucky. You don't know what you're missing until you get a taste of what you never had."
"Sounds like a country song."
"Not yet, those almost always come with broken hearts, and I'm not planning on breaking any in the near future."
If that wasn't swoon-worthy, she didn't know what was. Thankfully, the chair had arms she could grip, or she would have been in a puddle beneath the table.
As soon as the check was taken care of, Alex held her hand and walked her to the valet. While they waited for the SUV, he kissed her like every word he'd said during dinner was real. Could a heart as fractured as hers ever mend? She hoped so because love was all she ever wanted.
Tuckered out but happy, Maddie ran to the door when they arrived at Louise's.
Alex had planned to take her home first, but Louise's house was on the way, so they figured they'd get Maddie and then take Mercy home, but once in the car, Maddie begged Mercy to come to their house and tuck her in. When those hazel eyes looked into hers, she couldn't say no.
He led her inside to a living room of black and metal and glass. There wasn't color around unless Maddie's one-eyed tan bear counted.
Alex's house was as warm as an ice cube and as inviting as a barbed-wire fence.
"I know, it's like entering a black pit."
"That's being kind." She moved around the perimeter, skimming her fingers across the empty bookshelves. "Do you have pictures or stuff you've collected along the way?" Maddie tugged
