“Thank you, Jaxy,” I whispered, feeling a ghostly kiss on my forehead a moment later. Huddling, I let my mind delve into this minor mystery. Should I be angry with Jax as well? Could he have stopped Kyler? Or at the very least warned me? Biting my lip, I recalled how, before, it was always small things happening that were odd, but I overlooked. Like a previously closed window being unlocked and slightly opened when I looked at it again, thus providing me with an escape. Or something that stubbornly refused to work suddenly thrumming to life.
No, Jaxy could do nothing. He couldn’t communicate until I saw that picture. Recalling the back of the photo I read, I determined that might have been the price. Nothing was free. So, to converse with me, I had to acknowledge his presence in my life. Until then, he could keep watch and help, but I couldn’t know it was him. A playful tug on my hair made me think I was right, or at least close.
“I’m not overreacting, am I?” I asked my ghostly companion after a moment. That my voice wavered made me close my eyes for a moment to banish my weakness. I wanted so badly to belong, but not at this cost. No home was worth the abuse, nor its residents looking the other way because they wanted you there regardless of what it caused.
“No,” Jaxy whispered. “They sure stopped him after you almost died, did they not? Otherwise, why have you no longer experienced the pain you don’t deserve?”
Blinking, I straightened, although I bit my lip and slumped again after a moment. That was because Marcus had them show that video at school. While it stopped the behavior, I couldn’t help but wonder if there was another way. I still felt exposed, and as if my privacy never mattered. Did it? Was I meant to be a prisoner? Chewing my bottom lip, I tried to reason that I wasn’t, but my mind settled on the idea I was a pet instead.
“They’re lost, and desperate for you to lead them back into the light,” Jaxy sighed after a moment. “But that does not excuse their behavior. While you may feel like a kept pet, that’s how it usually is for omegas to a degree. They are cosseted and protected. My vanishing acts caused the pack a lot of stress, but that’s not a reason to abstain. You cannot let the fear of how others will feel prevent you from living, nor doing what you feel is right. Char and Dakota knew what Kyler planned to do with his evening. They could have tried to stop him. Locked him in a closet, for example. Unfortunately, since he was their alpha, it would not have worked. He would have ordered them to stop, and while they could have fought, his will would have painfully overridden theirs. So, you are wrong in that sense. However, once they left his pack, that was no longer true. Marcus could have stood toe to toe with him and done something, yes. But he is wary since they barely tolerate his presence. Had the pack targeted the females Kyler sought to hook up with, it would have been a whole new ballgame, however. So, no, you do not overreact. But you are not correct, either. Some laws prevented them from telling you what they were, albeit since you are you that’s waived. To say someone cursed this place might spur you to run. Thus, you would have been on the road and dealing with the pain while they mourned you leaving. Distance does not save you. Once you’ve discovered your mate, you are bound regardless of how far you run. Unless both parties reject the other. Which, if you try now, won’t do any good. His soul has to hear it for your words to take effect.”
Blinking, I mulled over his words, feeling scolded. After a moment, I sighed while deciding werewolves were complicated. Cosseted. I didn’t know if I could survive that. I wasn’t used to it, and I feared I would suffocate. But even so, was I wrong to run? Was this something that talking could fix? I might be unhappy for a while, but I would have a roof, food, income and people who cared even if they showed it in ways I didn’t like. Chewing my bottom lip, I debated both sides until my soul thrummed with agony, and I whimpered. Right, the pain, I forgot about my pain. If they perceived it, they would suffer alongside me. Hence Char’s pained expression.
I suppose it was cruel of me to run without hearing his explanation, but the thought of going back made my heart remember how much it ached. A ghost of that terrible pain surfaced, and I gasped. Perhaps I would hide for a few days and return when I believed I could stomach seeing them. Just not Kyler. I doubt I can face him soon. To have nearly killed me, and to have done it so I would suffer, I didn’t know if I had it within me to forgive that.
I get that people make mistakes, but that was one hell of an intended regret. What changed? Why did he want to apologize, anyway? Because he found out the person he decided I was, wasn’t the truth? Had he taken a moment, he could have figured that out on his own. Shaking my head, I laughed under my breath. Did it matter? I didn’t. That’s what hurt so much, that I believed I could be valuable to someone only to discover I
