What my mind knew was one thing. What my body instinctively felt was another, and my knees instantly turned into jelly the moment I stumbled back into my seat. I rested trembling fingers over my chest, and my heart thumped instantly against it.
Dmitry would never hurt me. Never.
But that didn't make him any less terrifying.
Dmitry was not evil, and he never would be.
But that didn't mean I was completely safe.
Dmitry hated me, and that was unlikely to ever change.
But even so...
Idiot, I chided myself as I reached for the mouse and clicked open a new spreadsheet to tackle. Such an idiot, Tahoma Garamond Baskerville. Such! An! Idiot!
MOST PEOPLE PROBABLY imagined my work with Strakh Inc. to be exciting and dangerous, but if that had really been the case, they would have never hired a klutz like me.
In reality, my main job was to crunch numbers forty hours a week, and I was really good at it. Exceptional even, which could be why I had ended up in their radar in the first place.
But as much as I enjoyed working on spreadsheets, there had also been times when I felt that my job was slowly killing me with boredom. It was only when I started working for Strakh Inc. that everything became meaningful, and each spreadsheet became the most glorious hunt for uncovering fraudulent anomalies.
And while my job description might still leave a lot to be desired for people who weren't big with numbers, perks-wise, however...
My workplace - contrary to my initial fears - was not the claustrophobic underground hideout where I had my job interview. Instead, I got to work Mondays to Fridays in the same swanky building, above ground. Our office was at 34F while my apartment - which I enjoyed rent-free - was at 24F. I even had a company-paid SUV for personal use...plus gas allowance!
A dream job, just like Keagan said, but the perks were only the icing on the cake. What truly made my work worthwhile was the absolute certainty that everything I now did served a higher purpose.
Just last week in fact, I was able to uncover a paper trail leading to a corrupt politician's secret bank account in the Cayman Islands, and recalling this had me smiling.
Oh, the joy of cracking the supposedly uncrackable—-
"Fuck."
My head jerked up, and I bit back a yelp of surprise at finding Dmitry suddenly standing across my desk. With his height and build, you'd think he'd be lumbering around like, I don't know, an elephant?
But no.
Instead, he was impossibly stealthy like the jaguar he reminded me of, and I supposed that made sense, since he was the leader of Strakh Inc. and-—
Oh shit, my boss was still glaring at me.
"S-Sorry, sir." I hastily got rid of my smile, thinking that it was what he found so offensive. "Is there anything I can do—-"
A sheaf of papers landed on my desk. "I've made a couple of revisions," he said brusquely. "I need it back before lunchtime."
"I'll get on it right—-" My voice trailed off as Dmitry had already turned around and stalked off.
Wake up and start smelling the shit, T.G.!
WEEK 14 ON THE JOB, and as pathetic as it was to admit, I still hadn't found a way to wean myself off Dmitry even after months - months! - of being ignored, scowled, and glared at.
Granted, I did get some encouragement from Sasha, who once told me not to take things personally, but...
I bit back a sigh as I remembered what had taken place that day. It was just last week when Dmitry's younger brother and the other men making up Strakh Inc. had a meeting at the "battle room", a.k.a. the place where the world's strangest job interview had taken place.
You'd think Dmitry would at least try toning down on the hatred while the others were around, but yeah - didn't happen. He had still acted as if I were the grossest thing on the planet, with the way his lip had curled every time I entered the room, and the way he had scowled and glared whenever he caught me speaking with any of the other guys.
It was almost as if he was just waiting for me to betray Strakh Inc. so he could have an excuse to pounce and hang me for dear life. And Sasha, seeing this, was so moved - either by my tenacity or idiocy - that he had taken me aside before leaving.
Please don't take it personally, Dmitry's younger brother (he was Voice #1, in case you hadn't figured out that part yet) had told me with quiet insistence. He's only like this because you remind Dmitry of someone he knows, and the memories associated with that person are far from good.
All the while Sasha was speaking, I remembered thinking at that time how his voice had sounded so much gentler. So, so gentle that it was impossible not to understand what he wasn't saying without words...
I reminded Dmitry of an evil ex-girlfriend, and this was Sasha's way of telling me that while he knew I'd do everything I could to get his brother to stop hating me...
It just wasn't possible, and maybe it never would be.
I HAD ONCE FOOLISHLY thought that if I understood why Dmitry hated me and found his reason was valid, that would be enough, and my attraction to him would die a natural death.
Yeah.
Right.
That was just purely wishful thinking on my part. I was already on Week 16 with Strakh Inc., and nothing had changed. I'd make coffee in the morning, Dmitry would get a couple of F-bombs in before lunchtime, and in between analyzing financial statements and working on my forecasts, I'd usually struggle with my Hamlet-like temptation.
To stare or not to stare, that is the question.
The one
