“Well, if that’s the case, you won’t want your birthday present.”
“What?” Sofia looked between us, aghast. “Why wouldn’t Zio want his birthday gift?”
I glared at Frankie. “You just had to go there, didn’t you?”
She frowned, then turned to Sofia. “Sof, go throw rocks for a second, okay? Can you count ten and see how far they’ll go?”
“I can count twenty!” she shouted jubilantly, scampering to the small beach next to us. “Watch!”
“Kid’s got it made,” I remarked. “If we could all just be happy skipping rocks, maybe the world would be a better place.”
“Hmph.” Frankie frowned as she came to stand next to me. “Well, while you feel sorry for yourself, open that. Happy birthday, big brother.”
I looked down to find a small package pressed onto my lap. “What’s this?”
“Just something little. And unmedicated. Open it.”
Obediently, I pulled the ribbon off the small black box, then opened it to find a scarlet paisley tie folded neatly inside.
“It’s—” Something thick lodged in my throat as I saw a similar fabric tightly binding a pair of snow-white wrists to a headboard. “It’s nice, Frankie. Thank you.”
“You burned that other red tie, so I figured you could use a new one. Sofia helped me pick it out.”
I blinked, taken back to the day I’d arrived home from Boston, gone straight to the kitchen, and burned the red tie in my pocket. The one that had still singed for four hours from the remnants of passion and rage all at once.
“It’s great, Frankie. Thank you.”
“Don’t sound so happy about it. That’s real silk, you know.”
“I’m sorry.” I shook my head. “I’m a little down, that’s all.”
“I’d say down is an understatement.” She sank to the cement block beside me, keeping one eye on Sofia. “Everyone’s worried about you. Nonna told me to drag you to Mass this weekend kicking and screaming if I had to. I told her I can only manage one toddler at a time.”
I shrugged, my hand moving automatically to the cross dangling over my shirt. I hadn’t been to confession in months. I hadn’t stepped foot in a church in just as long, and had been avoiding the calls from Nonna, Lea, and just about everyone else I was related to for more than eight weeks.
“This just isn’t where I expected to be at thirty-fuckin’-seven, you know?” I said. “A disgraced lawyer, bartending while I’m on unpaid administrative leave. And for what? A fuckin’ broad.”
Frankie snorted. “Okay, now I know you need to lay off the hard stuff. You keep talking like Sinatra, and I’m going to drag you over to AA.”
“No, no, no,” I said, but allowed her to reach into my jacket pocket and remove the flask. She was right. It only made me that much more pathetic.
“Have you heard from her?”
“Who?”
Frankie rolled her eyes. “Hilary Clinton. Who do you think? It is your birthday.”
“You think she’s going to, what, send me a card? Drop off some balloons?” I snorted. The idea of a princess like Nina de Vries strolling down our cracked sidewalk with a dozen multicolored balloons was laughable. “Nah, that’s all done with.”
Frankie glanced at the paper on my lap, then back at me. “It is?”
I scowled, crumpled the paper, and hurled it toward a garbage can a few feet away. It missed.
Frankie sighed. “Are you working again tonight?”
I nodded. “Yeah. I need to make the bills somehow.”
“What time? I could be home a little early. Get a cheesecake from Junior’s if you want. It won’t be Nonna’s, but it’s something…”
Frankie trailed off. Her meaning was clear. I’d stalwartly ignored any attempt to lure me up to the Bronx to celebrate getting older with my sisters and grandmother, who loved a party more than anyone.
“I have to be at work by five,” I lied. My shift didn’t start until ten.
Frankie’s brow rose. She could clearly see right through me, but didn’t say anything. Instead, she waited a moment more before speaking again.
“Mattie?”
“Yeah?”
“Are we…are we going to be okay?”
I frowned. “With what?”
“With…look, I have to ask. I noticed the mortgage is due in a few days, and, well, I know Jamie’s only been able to give you part-time shifts, and—”
“We’re fine,” I said a little too sharply. “Don’t worry about that.”
Frankie looked unsure. “I mean, I could probably pick up some shifts at Tino’s too, like I used to. Nonna could watch Sofia; I’m sure she wouldn’t mind—”
“I said we’re fine,” I cut her off again. “Frankie, I promise. This is your and Sofia’s house too. I’m not going to let anything happen to you two, all right?”
Even as I said it, a heavy weight lodged in my gut. I hated that she even had to wonder. I hated that we were both back where we started—Frankie working odd jobs because her teacher’s salary couldn’t pay for her and her little girl, me struggling to make mortgage payments I was way under-qualified to have. We had a tenant below who helped defray some of the costs of the red brick house off Van Duys Avenue. But it didn’t cover everything. Not even close.
“Zio!” Sofia interrupted as she scampered back over from the water. “Did you like it? I helped Mommy pick it out.”
I looked down at the tie in my lap, and immediately felt like shit. “Shi—shoot, kid. Yes, I love it. You did good, Sof. Real good.”
Sofia’s face split with a wide grin, minus two teeth. “See, Mommy! I knew it!”
She ran back to the water to continue throwing rocks.
“Okay,” Frankie said. “Well…if I don’t see you. Happy birthday, Mattie.”
I glanced at Sofia to make sure she wasn’t looking, then drained the last of my bottle. “Sure. Yeah. Thanks, Frankie. Thanks.”
Chapter Three
Nina
“I don’t understand. Why can’t I just give him what he wants and be done with it?”
Four pairs of eyes all blinked, none of them surprised.
I continued pacing on the other side of a marble-topped coffee table.
Jane and Eric sighed simultaneously from their places on their
