He doesn’t know if I’m serious or joking. He never was the brightest light in the disco.
‘So where is everyone? Where’s Lily, Lila, Mimi and Cora?’
When they’d chosen their Western monikers, I was pretty sure they’d come from the English Four Letter Christian Names Book.
‘All gone. All married Westerners and went abroad.’
I’m glad for them – it was what they always wanted.
‘And you?’ I ask, positive that no one would be crazy enough to take him on.
‘I married Susie. Remember her?’
Only too well. She was a regular who was often seen on the arm of wealthy customers. Seems like both Zac and Susie found love – or whatever it was – in the end.
Johnny Woo is screeching to a conclusion, so Zac races back to the stage.
By the end of the night, after outstanding renditions of ‘Crazy’, ‘I Will Survive’, ‘Summer Loving’ and the ‘Shoop Shoop Song’, we’re propping up the bar and being hit on by two very flash Frenchmen.
‘Tell me something,’ Carol slurs to hers. ‘Are you rich?’
‘Mais oui, we are very rich.’ The Rolex on each wrist gives it away.
‘Are you over forty?’
I can tell he’s trying to decide whether or not to lie. He decides against it.
‘Maybe by one or two years.’
‘Then I’m sorry, I can’t possibly be seen with you. I have a rule, you see. I only date poor men who were born in the same decade as me, sorry.’
She turns and grabs my arm as she floats out the door, leaving two very bemused males.
‘Don’t worry, mate,’ I hear Zac whisper to them in a moment of male bonding. ‘They’re nuns.’
The following morning, our first stop is at the production company Phil started working at before I left Shanghai. With a bit of luck, he still works for them and they can tell me where he is.
The girls behind the desk stare at me blankly – they’ve never heard of Phil Lowery and no Westerner works for them now, it’s local photographers only. Progress can be a pain in the arse sometimes.
We need a plan. We buy a map of the city and split it into six areas. I’m counting on the fact that the expat community in Shanghai is still relatively small and very incestuous – everyone knows someone who knows someone. We circle every hotel in the area, then I recruit Zac to pinpoint all the bars and restaurants regularly frequented by expats.
Next day, we set off for the furthest away zone and start scouring the streets. Initially, we’re too embarrassed to just walk into a bar and ask every Westerner if they know Phil Lowery, so we try to be as low-key as you can possibly be when you’re trailing round Shanghai with a Cindy Crawford look-alike. We order a drink and then casually enter into conversation with the bar staff and customers. By early evening, we’ve reached three conclusions:
1. This will take us a year to complete;
2. We’ll be pissed every day by lunchtime;
3. Cagney and Lacey never had these problems.
On day three, we try a different approach – it’s time to be ruthless. We go in and out of establishments like an SAS hit squad, leaving a trail of curious faces in our wake. Not one person shows even a flicker of recognition. I’m beginning to think I imagined him.
Four days later, we’re down and we’re out. There’s only one area left to try and my optimism has deserted me. Carol and I sit on the edge of the bath, our feet soaking in six inches of water.
‘How did I ever get involved in this?’ Carol wails.
‘Because you’re a loyal and loving friend,’ I remind her.
‘Cooper, I do love you, but I don’t love you this much. My feet are disfigured for life. No more Dr Scholl commercials for me.’
I take her to the bar for a consolation drink and Jack finds us there two hours later. Carol has adored him ever since I introduced them and explained that he sent the Rolls. However, to her credit, it’s been purely in a platonic fashion.
‘You two look like ladies who need cheering up.’
‘Jack, the only things that will cheer us up are a foot massage and another cocktail,’ Carol answers. ‘Which one are you offering?’
‘I’ll stick with the cocktail, since we’re in a public place,’ he chuckles. ‘So, should I take it that the hunt’s not going well?’
‘It’s right up there with Betamax videos and the Middle East peace agreement,’ I reply.
‘Have you tried the American Embassy?’ Jack asks. ‘He must have been registered there.’
I need to go back to detective school, I hadn’t thought of that. In saying that, there’s no way they would divulge that kind of information unless it was an international emergency.
Jack smiles and picks up the phone. In two minutes he’s through to a contact there, then gets put on hold.
‘I haven’t been in Shanghai all this time without making a few friends,’ he says.
A few minutes later, he’s listening intently. He frowns and replaces the receiver. ‘Sorry, Cooper, but it seems Phil Lowery returned to New York eight years ago.’
There’s a silence for a few minutes, then Carol finally speaks. ‘So, let me get this straight. We’ve come all the way to Shanghai, we’ve walked more miles than a nomadic tribe, been in more bars than an alcoholic, our feet look like they’ve been sanded by a floor buffer and you manage to find out he’s not here with a ten minute phone call… Jack, I think you owe us another few cocktails.’
The next day we have a choice – either head to New York on Phil Lowery’s trail, or stop off in Hong Kong to search for Sam Morton. Jess has called to say that she hasn’t found Tom yet, so there’s no lead to chase up there. The decision is made by the fact that Callum is already in New York, so we’ll have a free place to stay and some very welcome time
