Maybe I’m reading too much into his body language. “You know we never got to finish…watching Serenity. I have it on Blu-ray if you’d like to come back over to my place?” She studied his face to gauge his reaction. His eyes widened and his lips started to curve upward, but he pursed them and then blew out a breath. If she had to name his expression, she’d have said resolved.
“I’m sorry. I have something to do early tomorrow morning.” He tugged at his ear and didn’t even glance her way. Mary Allison’s nostrils flared as her blood boiled. She knew a brush-off when she heard one, and Holden was clearly lying.
What happened? How did I lose him?Is he having second thoughts about getting involved with a coworker? If he’s worried about the sticky proposition of co-mingling romantic and professional relationships, haven’t we already crossed that line? She tapped her fingernail against her front teeth as her brain ran through the events of his visit to her home earlier in the day. Only a few hours ago, he had made her come and promised to spend hours making their “first time” memorable. How could he possibly think their personal and work affairs hadn’t already been whirled around in an industrial-strength blender?
She squirmed in her seat and finally took the liberty of turning on his radio to break up the silence. She was a little surprised to hear the alternative rock station blare through the speakers but didn’t comment. They barely spoke for the rest of the ride back to her place, and by the time they arrived, her stomach felt sick, her spirit was crushed, and she wanted out of that ice locker. As he pulled into her driveway, she grabbed her bag and unfastened her seat belt. She nearly jumped out before the car stopped moving. “Don’t worry about walking me to the door.” She threw the words at him like daggers before slamming the door behind her and running to her front porch.
She fished her key out of her bag as she stomped up the steps, and once inside, she slammed that door behind her too. With tears welling up in her eyes, she turned around and looked through her peephole. Holden’s car remained in the driveway with him still sitting behind the wheel. What the fuck is he hesitating for? Get the fuck out of here!
She glanced at the clock, noting the time was barely nine-thirty at night so his bullshit story about needing to get up early didn’t hold water. If he could use such an obvious lie as an excuse, she’d use the same one to get rid of him. She slapped the switch to turn off the front porch light before running to turn off the lamp. Once she was shrouded in darkness, she peeked out the window to find Holden’s car still sitting in her driveway.
Leave, asshole! As she balled up her fist, nostrils flaring even as tears ran down her cheeks, she heard the doorbell ring. Fuck that!
He couldn’t humiliate her and then act as if nothing happened. She ignored the bell and instead ran around making sure all the house lights were off in every room. Once the house was as dark as a tomb and the only illumination was from the track lighting around the cement walkway leading from the driveway to the front porch, she looked through the peephole again. All she could make out was a shadow but the dark blob appeared to be moving away. She sucked in a breath and held the air until she saw the headlights of Holden’s pretentious Prius back out of her yard. Once he was gone, she turned on her lamp again.
After plopping down in her seat, she picked up her phone and texted Donnie: You will not fucking believe what happened to me!
Within five minutes, her phone was playing Donnie’s ringtone. She pressed the button to answer and his voice was in her ear. “Bitch, please! You know you can’t leave a cryptic message like that on my phone. You need to dish. Now!”
“Oh shit, Donnie…so fucked up!” She grabbed some tissues and wiped her face as she spilled the whole shameful debacle of how she had shown her O-face to a man who had a ton of control over her livelihood and had even lowered herself to the ranks of a part-time illustrator as a favor to him, only for him to put on a diaper, turn into a baby, and diss the hell out of her. She kept wagging her head, hardly able to believe the words she was saying herself. Being rejected so heartily had put her right back in that place she had been in high school, sitting behind those thick, black-rimmed glasses while being eaten alive by a size extra-small school uniform. She sniffled, feeling as if she had been hauled out of a warm bed and dumped into a virtual pit of dark, damp unpleasantness. “My hands are shaking. I feel so foolish and unwanted.”
“That is some bullshit, boo! Fuck him! If he did that stupid shit to you, he is on his fucking period!” Donnie’s animated voice let her know he meant every word, and she couldn’t help but giggle. One thing she could always count on was her best friend’s ability to make her laugh.
“You are so crazy! He’s not gay.” Her snickering escalated into a snort.
“Hooker! That is not what I meant. Gays don’t be having periods. Well, gay men don’t. What I meant was he fucked up. He probably has a small dick, and he was too embarrassed to let you see.”
She sighed, remembering the feel of Holden’s cock against her palm. “Nah, that’s another bitch of a thing. I touched it. He’s packing and I was expecting to hit it.”
“Aw damn, that is harsh. Sorry, boo. I don’t know what’s wrong with that
