Isla rolled her eyes. “You already apologised in class, you don’t have to —”
Asa shook his head, cutting her off. “This is kind of a plea, kind of an advance apology.”
Her brows rose warningly. “What for?”
“Since I’m too good of a friend to ditch you, I thought you’d like to tag along.”
“Tag along where?” Isla’s voice was cautious like she didn’t want to hear what he had to say.
“Oh, we’re spending lunch with Willa today.” Asa grinned, appearing as if he didn’t know this would undoubtedly piss his best friend off.
“Oh, hell no.” Isla took a step back.
“Woman up, Isles.”
“You can watch me woman the fuck up when I stick the carrot from my salad so far up that brunette’s —”
“Jesus, has anyone told you what a mouth you’ve got,” he muttered.
“I. Am. Not. Goi—”
“Carmen will be there,” he suggested hopefully.
Carmen, Carmen, Carmen. Goddammit, her name.
Isla threw him a dirty look. “What the heck am I supposed to do with her? She’s—she’s just Carmen.”
Asa didn’t know how anyone could call Carmen as just Carmen. God knew he couldn’t. She was the girl with the midnight hair who had thunderclouds in her eyes and separated herself into the half that was too cold for the sun and the half too dark for the moon.
Carmen wasn’t just Carmen.
Carmen was the girl who walked like she had no destination in mind, with her head tilted the slightest bit to the side as if she was perpetually questioning the purpose of everything her eyes landed on. She was the girl who spoke not to be heard but to listen, like that was her role in life. The girl who wore no expression and yet always had a smile on. Carmen wasn’t just Carmen.
And it made Asa want to shake her ‘till she spilled whatever she kept bottled up inside.
Asa decided he was losing his mind.
“Please?” He sighed.
“You know this would be so much better if you just liked Carmen instead of Willa.” Isla huffed. “Carmen I think I could put up with.”
Of course Carmen was easier for Isla to put up with—for anyone to put up with really. But there was something about her… something more than just that lack of judgement in her eyes whenever she looked at Asa. Something that appeared more like understanding—like empathy. As if she somehow saw past his award-winning grins.
That was somehow scarier than the possibility that he would never be able to rid Willa’s mind off all the assumptions she had about him. So here Asa was, going along with the choice that didn’t make his heart leap to his throat.
“Just pretend Willa doesn’t exist then.” He offered her his best smile, not bothering to correct the fact that he didn’t like Willa that way. “Come on, you know you like seeing me happy.”
“Never take no for an answer, do you?” Isla muttered, shoulders dropping in defeat.
“You know it.” Asa winked.
Asa was impulsive. Asa was rash. Asa didn’t know how to take no for an answer and couldn’t back down from a challenge.
Maybe it’ll end up breaking him. And maybe, just maybe, it’ll end up making him.
•••
With a very, very reluctant Isla by his side, Asa strode confidently towards the table where Carmen, Willa, a girl with dark hair and a purple — good lord, was that Joyce from history? — and another girl with earphones dangling around her neck, were seated.
“Mind if we join you?” Asa asked, feeling completely in his element, the words flowing from his mouth with ease.
Joyce looked like she wanted to cry again. The girl with the earphones seemed to find the ketchup stain on the table top interesting all of a sudden and Willa just full-on gaped at his arrival.
Carmen beamed at both Isla and Asa, her cheeks glowing faintly, and pulled out the empty chair next to her and patted it in a welcoming manner. Isla practically jumped at the offer, obviously not wanting to be stuck on the other vacant seat which was next to Willa.
“Why ask if you’re going to join anyway?” Willa asked Asa, raising a brow at Isla who had just made herself comfortable next to Carmen.
“I’m sorry, were you speaking to me? I couldn’t tell.” Isla shot Willa a sickeningly sweet smile. Too sweet.
Oh boy, Asa couldn’t help but think.
“I don’t know.” Willa smiled back with that same over-the-top sugary niceness. “Do you even have the required intellectual capacity to have a conversation with another human being, let alone me?”
Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy. Asa found himself shooting a glance at Carmen for unknown reasons. When he found her eyes already fixed on him, there was a jolt in his chest, right at the centre. Asa decided, again, that he was losing his mind.
“Considering you have an IQ the size of your boobs, I’d say even a squirrel can have a conversation with you,” Isla shot back.
“Um…” Asa wanted to say something. He knew he was supposed to because they were starting to gain attention from amused students. But damn Carmen and the thunderclouds in her eyes. It felt like they were shooting lightning bolts into his eyes as they maintained the eye contact.
Willa’s face went red at Isla’s remark about her body, touching on a sensitive spot. “Where’d you rip off that comeback from? How-to-pull-off-not-being-a-total-blonde dot com?” She sneered, throwing Isla a meaningful look over her blonde mane for emphasis.
“You got a haircut.” Carmen’s voice snapped both Isla and Willa out of their heated exchange. Meanwhile, Asa was stuck, wondering why Carmen’s voice reminded him of his cousin Mirabelle’s violin recitals during the family bonfires—serene and out of this world.
Asa was losing his godforsaken mind.
“What?” all four girls asked in unison, wearing identical expressions of have-you-lost-your-goddamn-mind on their faces.
“Your
