"What is it? Don't you want to kiss me?"
Ryan looks down, then back up at me, his eyes serious. "I do want to kiss you. But..."
I bite my lip and feel anger welling up. "Because of Kim? Is that why? Don't tell me you still like her!"
He shakes his head and grabs both my hands in his, holding them tight. "No, it's not Kim and I don't like her anymore. Taryn, you have a boyfriend. I can't kiss you and stuff unless you break up with Patrick. It's not right."
Ugh, Ryan and his morals. But he's right. I need to deal with Patrick once and for all.
I sigh, gazing down at Ryan's hands over mine. He has such long fingers and I can picture them running through my hair. Leaning my head back on the couch I stare into his sweet eyes. He's all I've ever wanted for so long.
I raise one of Ryan's hands to my lips and kiss his knuckles. "Okay, I'll dump Patrick. And then we can be together?"
"Sure." Ryan pulls his hand away and picks up the controller, going back to the game.
Chapter Six
On Monday I get up early so I can peruse the internet for help picking out an outfit. Kim texted with suggestions the night before but I didn't even respond to her text. I'm sick to death of her dictating to me what to wear, how to act, what to say. If I'm seriously going to be dating Ryan I'm going to have to grow some pretty big balls. And that starts with picking out my own damn clothes.
I finally settle on some navy jeans, a cream long sleeved top and my white Adidas. A pearl and gold band bracelet and matching earrings and I'm set. I leave my hair down and add some bronzer, mascara and lip gloss. Good to go!
I have tennis after school but I'm thinking of ditching it. Today is the day I break up with Patrick. My speech is planned, I'm not backing out, no matter how many times he kisses me or pleads or begs.
"Keep your eyes on the prize..." I whisper to my reflection in the mirror
That prize is Ryan and his sweet smile and soft lips.
I grab my backpack and head out.
◆◆◆
Kim is wearing one of her sexiest outfits, a short pleated mini skirt and low-cut top with high heeled velvet boots. She barely makes the dress code. Next to her I look like a twelve-year boy but I could really care less. I lean against my locker and check my phone while Kim bitches.
"So, you're just going to dress like a bandsie now, is that it? Where's your clarinet and glasses?"
I ignore her. Maybe she'll just go away. I haven't seen Ryan or Patrick yet. If he stays home sick today I swear I'll go over to his house and break up with him there, even if he's puking in the bathroom.
Suddenly Kim grabs my elbow in an iron grip.
"What the hell!" I glare at her as she shoves me hard against my locker.
"What is your fucking problem, Taryn?!" Her face is inches from mine and I want to shrink under her blazing eyes. But I can't. If I show weakness now, I will never fully stand up to her.
I wrench my elbow from her grasp and push her back. "Nothing! Just give me some damn space, Kim, for Christ sake! We don't always have to hang out together you know!"
Kim stands there, her eyes wide and her mouth slack, but only for a second. She folds her arms over her middle and regards me coldly. "We don't have to hang out at all." She gives me one last withering stare, turns on her heel and leaves.
"Fuck." I let the breath I was holding slowly hiss out. I might have gone too far. I don't want Kim for an enemy, I've seen what she can do. But maybe it's better to get it over with. With her and with Patrick.
I look up as Manny and his gang pass by. They're all kind of swaggering as they go, laughing and swearing, making rude comments. I don't know why Manny hangs out with them. Yesterday he was so nice and didn't seem his usual rough self at all. Now today he looks just as mean as he usually does.
Still, the thought crosses my mind that it wouldn't horrible to be friends with him. Shit, maybe he can protect me from Kim and keep her from kicking my ass
As he passes, I reach out and touch his arm. "Hey, Manny." I give him a friendly smile.
Manny and his gang stop in front of me, the guys looking at him and each other, then the smirks come out. Gina is with them and she looks at me with her black rimmed eyes and her mouth curls into a snarl.
"Oh my God..." She murmurs, nudging Manny.
I freeze, my smile fading. I try to ignore the others but I want to shrink down to nothing and crawl into my locker. Manny is looking at me so coldly. What happened to yesterday??
His face slides into a scowl and he puts an arm around Gina, dismissing me with his eyes.
"Hey."
That's the only word he says to me as he leads his friends away. They're all cracking up and looking back at me like I'm some kind of freak.
Which I guess to them, I am.
◆◆◆
I'm so bummed about how Manny treated me that I'm finding it hard to even lust properly after Michael in first hour.
Manny is an asshole. Plain and simple. I shoot him a glare at the back of the class but he doesn't even look up. He's drawing something in a notebook while Gina watches. That skanky bitch. I hate her.
"Eyes front, Miss Bishop."
I turn around and look up as Michael scowls at me from the white board.
