Eliza tossed and turned and sweat was dripping from her forehead. I got a cool wet cloth from the bathroom and dabbed her face with it. I thought she might have woken up, but she seemed to be fast asleep. I decided to just sit at her bedside for a bit longer, before I'd take a nap myself.
CHAPTER 11
I hear heavy breathing in my ear
I feel my legs and arms gently swaying
from side to side
Am I scared?
My heart is beating hard or is it his?
I try and look up to see his face
but my eyes won't open
I try and try
Who is this man with his familiar smell
carrying me like a rag doll
Am I in danger?
I woke up but not in the panicked state I'm normally in when I wake from these dreams. It was different this time. I was somewhat aware that I was dreaming and I didn't feel as threatened as I normally do. There was something familiar about it, like it was a memory, not a scary dream. I felt hot, but noticed a damp cloth covering my forehead. That felt nice. I focussed on what was around me and saw Zack sitting on the edge of my bed, looking like he might need some sleep himself. His eyes searched my face presumably for signs of trouble or illness.
“How are you feeling?" he asked a bit brusquely, but I knew he was concerned for me.
“Fine." I grumbled.
I was feeling a bit queasy and dizzy, but not too bad. The answer didn't satisfy him. He pressed on asking what exactly I was feeling and I thought it better just to say as he would know anyway if I were trying to hold back. I was slowly realising there was no hiding my feelings from him. He just knew when I wasn't exactly truthful.
It was scary to think I was going to be able to do that too when I got through this and if I had the gift. I hadn't noticed any changes in my awareness of things though and suddenly felt a wave of panic engulf me. What if it turned out I didn't have this gift and would just start hallucinating again. What would happen to me? I started to sweat again and felt hot and cold at the same time. Zack noticed my change of relative calm to feeling out of control.
“Eliza, lay down and breath. Just try and relax and let it happen.”
He got up to change my damp cloth for a fresh one and when he moved his scent suddenly overwhelmed me. I hadn't noticed it before, but he smelled divine if you could say that about a person. It wasn't a chemical smell, it was earthy and fresh at the same time. It made me feel comfortable but something else awakened in me as well. The fancy I took to him when I first met him and made me want to flirt with him, came flooding back but a hundred times stronger. I wanted him and I wanted him now.
When he came back and tried to put the cloth back on my brow, I couldn't help myself. I sat up a bit and grabbed his face. I needed to kiss him so badly! My urge was rudely interrupted by two hands pushing my face away and I was pushed back down on the bed.
“Eliza, control yourself!" Zack said firmly with a stern look on his face.
“You need to calm yourself down, girl.”
His eyes now looked amused and a little smile played around his lips. It suddenly dawned on me what I had just done!
“Oh no, Zack, I don't know....I am so sorry, I, I didn't mean to.... your scent, I....”
That's all I was able to stutter. I couldn't quite make sense of it in my head. What on earth had just happened? I was so embarrassed; I turned around and wouldn't look at him again. I could feel my whole face go completely red.
“I..., I need to sleep." I mumbled as I pulled the duvet up to hide under.
I wanted to crawl away and forget the whole thing. But I couldn't. His smell was right there and driving me absolutely crazy. I decided the best thing was to breathe through my mouth to try and avoid it. It was kind of working. However, I was uber aware of him, sitting next to me on the bed.
“Could you just move away from me? Please?" I pleaded with a small voice.
What on earth must he think of me. This was excruciating.
“Sure." I heard him say and felt him move away.
“Go back to sleep. We'll talk later.”
I wasn't sure if I ever wanted to talk about any of it. I just wanted to pretend it never happened.
I must have dozed off after a while because when I woke next, some light peeped through the blinds and Zack was asleep on the other bed. Though, as soon as I moved, he opened his eyes too. He didn't move or say anything, probably waiting to see whether I'd doze off again. I suddenly remembered what I had done last night and quickly closed my eyes again. I couldn't look at him.
I felt so unwell though, I had to go to the toilet so there was nothing for it, I just had to get up and go. I told myself to breathe through my mouth, but I couldn't help taking a little sniff, to see if it was still there. I stopped breathing straight away as the smell made me dizzy instantly. Was this it? The gift of enhanced senses didn't seem so enticing any more. I told myself to focus and go to the bathroom
I managed to get there but felt as sick as a dog. My head was spinning and saliva filled my mouth. I knew this feeling and got to the toilet just in time. I hate being sick and was crying with
