He insisted.
I looked at Zack for permission but he shook his head. Damn. Now I had to come up with something good, otherwise Zack would deal with it and I had to avoid that at all cost. I didn't want Kas to suffer for my cause. I had to tell him a big lie now, but it might work. It just had to.
“Oh my sweet Kas." I sighed.
I saw his eyes waiting, hoping.
“I really didn't want you to know, or anyone else..." I paused, letting a tear roll down my cheek.
It wasn't difficult. I felt so sad for him, as I knew what I was about to tell would crush him.
“I had a big setback the other night. The night I went away, I had a breakdown, Kas." I was sobbing now.
“I've been committed to short term closed psychiatric care.”
I saw Zack springing into action out of the corner of my eye, phoning someone.
“I can't have contact with people at the moment Kas. My realities are all mixed up, I need to get myself sorted first. I begged to FaceTime you and try and put you off without telling you the truth, after mum had said you kept asking. She wanted to let you know, but I didn't want her to. Please don't tell anyone else. Please Kas..." I cried.
I saw the pain in his eyes. He was hurt, because I hadn't trusted him enough to tell him, and sad for my plight.
“I didn't want you to see me like this Kas, it scares me. It scares me to think you won't be able to see past it in the future.”
I put my head in my hands.
“I...I.., I love you Eli.”
His eyes welled up and his voice hitched in his throat.
He was saved from saying any more by a nurse that had magically turned up out of nowhere. Zack's work. She gently moved me aside and sat next to me so Kas could see her. She spoke softly to Kas.
“Kasper, it's best we stop this call now. Eliza needs to rest. She needs to take a step back from the real world for a while to heal her mind. You do understand that, don't you? I'm glad she told you, it will help with her recovery, so feel pleased that she eventually opened up to you. It's a big step for her. I'll give you a number you can text for information about progress, but no more approaching Eliza until her psychiatrist deems she's ready for it, okay?”
She spoke kindly but firmly.
Kasper looked distraught but nodded.
“Is she going to be okay?" he managed to utter, all the fight and distrust had left his body.
I felt so mean.
“Yes, we're confident she can beat this. It's a small set back in her treatment plan, but she can recover. We need to get the medication right, but we just don't know how long it will take, that's all. Say your goodbyes now please.”
She moved over to let me speak.
“I'm so sorry Kas. I miss you. Goodbye my love.”
I studied his handsome face that looked so distraught. I wasn't sure what I felt. I missed him and cared for him deeply but I don't think I could ever again love him the way I did before I had met Zack and Zaphire.
“Don't be sorry babe. Just get better, okay. I love you.”
With that we broke the connection.
I sighed a deep breath of relief and looked at Zack, who was observing me with, if I wasn't mistaken, some admiration.
“That was ingenious, Eliza! I thought I was going to have to step in but you managed to save it from the brink. Well done.”
He instantly realized I wasn't feeling great about it.
“Don't feel bad. You had to do what you had to do and you did it well. Be proud of yourself. He may feel bad now, but he'll cope. Better than being arrested innocently, remember. It's actually perfect, as there's no time limit now. Absolutely brilliant. You're a natural!”
He looked so pleased, but I felt bad. I hoped I would get used to deceiving people as that is what I, apparently, was a natural at, I thought bitterly.
“You better let my mum know the recent addition to our deception." I whispered flatly.
“Good point, Eliza. I'll do that straight away." he said whilst getting his phone out.
He signalled a thank you to the nurse who had helped us out. She came up to me and rubbed my back.
“Are you alright, love?" she asked kindly, and introduced herself as Nurse Kate.
“I'm glad I could be of help but let me know if you need anything else, love. You look exhausted."
She smiled warmly at me.
I let her give me a hug and I had a good long cry. One that I hadn't allowed myself to do, but was massively overdue.
CHAPTER 24
I gave Eliza some time to get herself together after the nurse had left. Kate had done a brilliant job having been put on the spot like that.
I knew I could rely on her. She was the queen of improvisation, quick to adapt to any situation and incredibly intuitive. Perfect for situations like these.
I was contemplating not pulling up Eliza over her earlier insubordination toward me. She'd done a great job, but she was obviously quite shook up over it. I had a suspicion that she had an extremely heightened sense of morality. Deception was going to take a toll on her, if she didn't learn to turn that sense down somewhat. In our job we were all too often asked to use some form of subterfuge to get our results. She might do better not being out in the field after this mission, but instead doing an office job. That would be a waste of her talents though, as she had a
