The subject had never come up, so I never mentioned to Lukas that I still lived in the very same apartment I’d grown up in just down the road from where he and Lisa lived.
“I talked to my sister,” he said.
Right. Of course. “How is she?” I asked.
“She’s good.”
“You talked to her?”
“I did.”
“And she said that herself? That she’s good? Because I’m not good. I am so not good. I think I might be falling apart a little bit. I’ve been trying to get her to talk to me but she won’t talk to me, Lukas. And I don’t know what else to do because I don’t know who I am without Lisa in my life.”
“Hey,” he said softly, stepping forward to cup my cheek. “Take a breath. Everything is okay. You’re okay. Lisa’s okay. We’re all okay.”
I swallowed. “Okay.” The word was beginning to sound strange, just like sorry and forgive.
He smiled. “Are you going to invite me in, or what?”
“Oh.” You’re a bumbling idiot, Kayla. The hallway smells like Kraft Dinner and wet cardboard. Get the poor man out of there. I stepped aside and gestured for him to come in. “Sorry. Clearly, my mind is a little jumbled.”
Lukas brushed past me and stepped into the kitchen. I closed the door behind him and set the roses on my kitchen island right as the timer on my stove went off. I padded over to it. “Do you want a cup of tea? It’s freshly brewed.”
Lukas tucked his hands in his pockets. “Sure. Why not?”
I took two mugs down from the cupboard beside the stove and filled them with piping hot tea. I passed one to him and we moved into the living room to sit down.
Then I remembered how much of a mess I was.
I paused as he took a seat and looked up at me. “I should shower,” I said.
“What?”
“I should shower,” I said again, like that would help clarify things for him.
That little frown formed between his eyebrows. “Right now? Why? Can we talk first?”
Priorities, Kayla. Priorities.
“Yes.” I sat down and gripped my mug in both hands. “Yes, we can. I’m just… I’m all over the map. I look like a mess.”
“You don’t look like a mess.”
“I feel like one.”
“It hasn’t been an easy week.”
“No,” I admitted. “It hasn’t. What do you want to talk about?”
“Us.”
“Us?”
God, I was starting to sound like a fool. Everything he said, I repeated back to him or stammered over.
Lukas smiled graciously. “Yes. Us. You and me.”
“There can’t be a you and me. Lisa forbids it.”
“I spoke with my sister.”
My heart began to thump wildly in my chest. “You did?”
“Yes. It wasn’t easy, and it took some time, but I got her to come around and finally understand how I feel about you.”
How he feels about me? I put my mug down on the coffee table as my hands started to shake. “How do you feel, Lukas?”
He smiled like he had a secret he was about to let me in on. “I’m head over heels in love with you, Kayla. I told Lisa I wasn’t going to give you up.”
He did? “You did?”
“I did.” Lukas nodded. “Lisa admitted it was wrong of her to be so upset. She’s given us her blessing, Kayla. So, if you’ll have me, I want to start over.”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Was this real? Or had I passed out while I was waiting for the kettle to boil and this was all some cruel dream?
If I woke up Lukas-less, I was going to blow my top.
“Say something,” Lukas said.
“Are you positive this is what you want? That I’m what you want? We’re from different worlds, Lukas.”
“I’m certain. And we’re not from different worlds. We’re from this world right here. This neighborhood. This town. You and me? We grew up the same. I’ve never been more certain about anything in my life.”
“Me neither,” I breathed.
I fell toward him. Lukas met me in the middle of the sofa. He engulfed me in his arms and lowered me down onto my back. His lips sealed over mine, and every single nerve ending in my body sang to life. After feeling numb and hollow for nearly a week, the rush of emotions and joy was almost overwhelming. Tears spilled down my cheeks and Lukas wiped them away with his thumbs while he kissed me.
A kiss had never tasted so good, like honey, ginger, and hope.
“Wait,” I stammered, breaking away.
His eyes darted back and forth between mine. “What?”
“I need to tell you something before we go any further.”
“What is it?”
I smiled. “I love you too.”
Lukas grinned. “You’re a shit disturber, you know that? I thought it would be something bad.”
“It is bad,” I teased. “I’m not supposed to end up with you. I’m supposed to end up with the safe-choice guy. The guy in the khakis who likes to barbeque but doesn’t know where he leaves his car keys. The guy who doesn’t care about driving a minivan to take our kids to swimming or piano lessons.”
“Rodney?” Lukas teased. “Are you talking about Rodney?”
I laughed as he nuzzled his way to the groove of my neck. “Poor Rodney.”
“You snooze you lose, Rodney.”
I held his face in my hands. “Why are we still talking about Rodney?”
“I don’t know.”
I kissed him hard. Lukas’ hands wandered all over my body and began pulling my clothes off. I relished the feeling of his fingers grazing my bare skin and I fumbled with the sash on my robe. Realizing I needed to shower, I extracted myself out from underneath him and led him down the hall. He followed me like a lost puppy dog and I relished the power I held over him.
I slipped into the bathroom with him hot on my heels and turned on the water. I dropped my robe and he looked me over, his eyes filling with desire.
“Want to know something wild?” I asked.
“Tell me.”
“I’ve never had sex in this shower before.”
Lukas grinned like
