Imp was just about frantic with worry when Del walked in the door.
“Where’ve you been?” he demanded, casting around behind her. “Why weren’t you answering your phone?”
“Was busy.” Del dismissed his concerns like lint flicked from her sleeve. “Went for a drive.”
“Are you nuts?” Imp closed the door and bolted it behind her, staring. “You went back to the Porsche? Are you trying to get caught?”
“Chillax, I’m down with Wendy.”
“Wendy?”
“The rentacop from the bank.” Imp began to choke. Del held it for two seconds, then broke into a huge grin. “Gotcha! We ate ice cream, then went for a drive.” She kissed her fingertips with scarcely feigned bliss. “Wendy just wanted to see what I could do, so I showed her. Then we went back to her place and made out.” She peered at Imp, concerned. “Can you breathe, man? One blink for no, two for yes?”
Imp finally took a shuddering gasp. “Are you insane?”
“Nah.” Del strolled past him and looked around, then made a beeline for the kitchen. “Any beer?”
Imp stalked after her, more anxious than angry. “Becca, I am over you fucking with me—”
“Wendy says some corporation paid her employers to take her off our case. Guess that’d be your sister?” After a second, Imp nodded reluctantly. “She’s not a cop, she says we’re cool, she wants to hang out with me, I’m going to say no? I didn’t lead her back to us, bro, I’m not an idiot.” She reached inside the fridge for a can of Special Brew. “So what’s new?”
Imp’s shoulders sagged, an armature of tension that had been holding them tense gradually unwinding. “Give me one of those.” He wriggled his fingers until Del stuck a chilly can in his hand. “Sláinte.” He shuffled back towards the games room. “We were waiting for you to come home before we had a council of war to discuss the options, but Doc and GeeBee are—” he shrugged elaborately—“indisposed. Cheers.”
He raised his can ironically and chugged a mouthful, then grimaced. “Awful, simply dreadful. The only thing worse than drinking this horse piss is not drinking it.”
Del drank. “Back atcha. What do you mean they’re indisposed?” Imp pointed at the ceiling in silence. “Oh. Did they say when they’d be back?”
“Not. A. Clue.” Imp collapsed onto the sofa. “But Doc said something about ram-raiding the wardrobe department for props, so I don’t think they’ll be too long.” He fixed Del with a steely stare. “Spill it. Who’s Wendy really, and what’s her angle?”
“She’s a thief-taker. Turns out Hamleys are sore losers, and so are Pennine Bank. She was there to interview the manager when you and Doc walked in, but she’s off the case now. Your sister offered more to HiveCo to stop investigating than the insurers were paying. And like I said, she isn’t a cop. She doesn’t enforce the law.”
“Fucksake.” Imp face-palmed. “You know all this because she told you while you were making out together? I’m talking hot lesbian cop-on-getaway-driver make-out sex here, am I right? Were handcuffs involved?”
“Essentially yes except for the handcuffs. Well, maybe.” Del froze, then punched the sofa right beside his head. “And fucking stop pushing, you do not get the details. We did not end up in bed—”
“—Not this time—”
“—Fuck you, Imp, just fuck off already, okay?”
He raised his hands, then cackled wickedly: “Becca’s got a girlfriend! Becca’s got a girlfriend!—” He stopped abruptly, shocked sober as it actually sank in. “She was waiting for you.”
“Yeah, I did say that, didn’t I? She wants to talk to us.”
“Jesus, Del.” Imp grimaced, face contorting in almost physical pain.
“She says her boss is hiring people like us. Some kind of pilot project at HiveCo.”
“Are you insane?” Imp glared at her. “They’ll make you wear a suit and work office hours and piss in a jar—are you trying to grow up or something? One taste of cop quim and you’re eager to go down on the Man—”
Del exploded: “Fuck you, Imp, just fucking fuck you!” He expected her to storm out at that point, but she surprised him yet again—this was turning out to be a day for unpleasant surprises from people he thought he knew—and dropped to the sofa instead. “Fuck you,” she groused, a final aftershock from the temblor shaking down the walls, “it’s not like that!”
“Then tell me,” he said with studied insouciance, “what it’s like, what it’s really, really like.”
“I’m out of the caper party,” she told him. “Shit got too real. We nearly got caught yesterday. Not just Wendy, the asswipes with guns you told me about? And before that, the toy shop. They’re paying thief-takers now, turns the heat up under us, know what I mean? Wendy’s boss is off our case but—”
“A quarter of a million is what’s up.”
Her eyes went wide. “Whaa—”
“That’s what I went to see sis about. I was going to turn her down, y’know? Because you’re right, it’s getting dangerous. Don’t wanna play double or quits when the stake is a stainless steel one stuck through the base of my skull. But that was before she pulled HiveCo off our ass. We’ve got top cover on this, Del, no more thief-takers, no more goons with guns, and a whole lot more money. And she figured out what we need to do, it’s just a treasure map—”
The next thing he knew, Del was on top of him with a death grip on his collar, snarling mouth inches away from his nose: “What aren’t you fucking telling me, you bastard?”
“The map—” Imp was choking—“the map starts—” Del relaxed
