I swallow hard at the thought and then push it far back to the darkest corner of my mind. Whenever we finally do have our talk about the future, I'm not sure how I’ll react if Donovan says he has trouble envisioning setting a wedding date, or beyond that, a family.
Will I accept that it might just take him longer to get to where I am—or will I walk away?
Either choice makes my heart feel like it’s shattering. This isn’t how I want to feel on Christmas Eve . . . at this gorgeous lodge, with this gorgeous man.
Donovan is the love of my life. I can’t imagine a future without him in it. There has to be a way we can work through this. I just wish I knew what that was.
I remind myself that I don’t need to dive into that now. The timing isn’t right. Besides, it’s almost Christmas and I'm determined to have a good time. Plus, Donovan hasn’t looked at his phone once since we arrived. That has to be a good sign. Maybe it really is possible for him to relax. I just need to plan more getaways like this in order to put some space between us and our jobs.
Stacy was right. This will be a chance for us all to clear our heads.
Donovan lays down the pamphlet beside his mug of untouched hot cocoa. He climbs onto the bed, making his way toward me until he falls at my side.
The moment he’s close enough, he reaches out his strong arms and pulls me against him. I nestle closer, resting my head on his chest. I listen to his heartbeat, finding comfort in the slow, rhythmic pulse.
“I feel like this Christmas is going to be really great for us,” I murmur, drowsily.
His fingers begin to stroke through my hair, lifting the long, dark locks away from my face.
“It is,” he whispers assuredly against my scalp before pressing a soft kiss against my hair. “It’s going to be great for us in so many ways.”
He tightens his arms around me and I snuggle in closer, full of love and hot cocoa. My heart swells. In this moment, everything feels perfect. Maybe I’ve been worried for no reason.
A confidence that we will work this out fills me.
After all, everyone deserves at least one Christmas miracle in their life.
Stacy Davis
Clothes fly everywhere as Ryan digs through his suitcase. Apparently, he’s looking for something to wear that will impress Ava, who’d mentioned that she loves Christmas colors. Ryan’s favorite Christmas sweater, the one with a panda in a Santa hat, is red and green. I tell him it will do the trick.
Once he’s dressed to impress, I let the kid go crazy, opting to explore our large suite over worrying about his mess. He has his own little room inside the suite, so we have tons of space. The bedroom Jake and I share is huge and beautiful with large windows that overlook the tree farm below. Everywhere I look, there’s nothing but snowy hills and growing fir trees.
It’s as picturesque as a holiday greeting card.
I’d definitely been uncertain about dragging our growing family all the way out here for Christmas, but Co-Co, Ethan, Go-Go, and Owen all seem so inviting. It’s like they’re sincerely happy to share their lodge with us like we’re part of their family.
That wasn’t what I’d expected at all. I’d assumed, judging by the beautiful pictures, that a place this posh wouldn’t be so inviting and cozy. But thanks to Co-Co and Ethan’s warm welcome I feel really at home here. And I’m honestly a little bit too excited about the idea of baking Christmas cookies.
Cooking is one of my favorite hobbies. It relaxes me. And I was a tiny bit sad that I wouldn’t get to make any of my holiday favorites since we were spending Christmas away from home. But baking Christmas cookies with those two delightful sisters . . . that more than makes up for it.
Ever since I learned about this pregnancy, I’ve been missing my family more and more. I grew up in a loud house with tons of siblings running around. I want that for the little family that Jake and I are starting. Being here just solidifies that for me.
It’s true I hadn’t planned on starting on my big family aspirations so soon, but some of the best things in life are unexpected, so I’m doing my best to embrace it.
Life has been changing rapidly lately. I know Jake and I still have a lot to figure out but being here is settling my nerves somehow. I’m hoping that feeling will rub off on Jake, too. Although, maybe I shouldn’t get too ahead of myself.
The idea of birthing one giant NFL offspring is scary enough. If we get too comfortable with the idea of our rapidly growing family, Jake might want to move out to the country and have a whole farm full of kids.
I rub my belly, trying not to think about all the terrifying new things motherhood will bring my way.
“You doing okay?” Jake asks. He steps up beside me, his arms protectively looping around my body as he presses a kiss against my cheek. “You look like you’re lost in thought. Are you feeling nauseous from the helicopter ride or anything?”
My heart melts as his warm lips meet my cool cheek. I lean against him, relishing how it feels to be in Jake’s strong, powerful arms. I can feel every muscle in his body as he holds me tight against him. It’s like being safely sheltered from a blizzard. If I could just stay right here in his arms, I know I’d be fine. Jake is going to be the world’s best father. That thought alone pushes my worries away—at least for the moment.
“No, I'm just thinking about how lucky
