It took great effort for Megan to take Jake inside the house. Megan couldn’t manage to take him upstairs so she laid him down on the couch and tucked him up in blankets. He passed out again, but Megan watched him carefully and he seemed like he was going to be okay. His breathing was steady as he slept, and though his pulse was fast, he didn’t seem to be losing too much blood from his arm. She was no expert, but she thought maybe he would heal.
Megan felt restless as she waited for Jake to wake up, so she set to work around the house, trying to keep herself distracted. She dragged the bodies in the yard out of sight, even though her head was swimming and her body ached. She cleaned blood from her face as best as she could and ate a small meal from the tins in the cupboard of the house. She gathered all of the weapons from the bodies in the yard and stored them under the sink. Even holding a gun now felt dangerous after what had happened to Jake.
Megan felt anxious when she ran out of tasks to do and so she explored the house for a while. It was a nice suburban property, the kind she always dreamed of having some day with the man of her dreams. Now, she was stuck in this place with Jake, not knowing if they’d survive another day. They were battered and bruised, and the saddest part was that she was used to it. She was used to living in terror of violence. But some of that terror was gone now. They’d survived things that most humans would never have to endure. If that didn’t make her strong, she didn’t know what did.
She wished Aby could see her now. She’d grown so much in the past few days. The last time she’d been with Aby, she’d felt bitter and small next to her, always feeling overlooked by her and Jake. But if Aby could see her now, would she see a hero? Would she see the woman who kept her fiance alive, always digging him out of trouble because he was spiralling without her?
Megan sighed as she went to check on Jake. He was restless in his sleep, muttering something under his breath. Megan thought he might be asking for something so she leant close to listen to him. But he wasn’t asking for Megan.
He was muttering Aby’s name.
Megan couldn’t help smiling at that. She had to admit that their love for one another was sweet, if troublesome. They were a kind of all or nothing couple. They gave everything to one another. Not for the first time, Megan felt envious. She deserved something like that. But she guessed that the apocalypse wasn’t exactly the best time to be looking for a man...especially when half of them were abusive assholes who wanted to hurt her.
How many times had a man tried to kill her since she left Pittsburgh? She’d lost count. She didn’t trust men for the most part anyway, but even less so now. No, she was better off alone. Men like Jake who loved their partner so much were rare. Megan only seemed to attract the men who were incapable of good. They disguised themselves as nice guys for a while, but they always turned out nasty. That was the last thing that Megan needed now.
No, she was better off just her. She had enough problems to deal with without a man adding to them. It was lonely, but she had Jake. She watched him, her heart racing. She was terrified that he could just die at any minute and leave her on her own. He was trouble, but he was all she had. And for as long as they were searching for Aby, they had a direction to move in, a purpose in life. If they could find her, Jake might go back to the way he was. He might recover emotionally as well as physically.
But it was looking less and less likely. The further they strayed, the less likely it seemed that they’d find one another again. What if Jake’s mental health only got worse and worse? What if he wanted to take his own life for real? Megan shivered. She didn’t think she could forgive herself if he did that while she was supposed to be taking care of him. She had to help him through this whole thing, no matter what they were faced with.
It was going to be tough. His heartache would only get worse. His injuries were bad. He might never have full use of his arm again if the bullet wound didn’t heal properly. They would face a million challenges before they found any kind of peace. But Megan wanted to keep fighting. She felt like her life had never really had a chance to get started. She hadn’t felt the happiness that so many people got to experience. Now that all of this had happened, it was going to be harder to find anyway, but she wanted to try. Maybe they could make a life for themselves in that house in the suburbs. Maybe they could have a simple kind of existence, but a happy one. That’s all she needed. They were good people. Surely they at least deserved a life free of any more pain?
Megan was weary, but she knew sleep wouldn’t come easily to her. Besides, with Jake out of action, she needed to protect the house. She positioned herself by the window, a pistol in her hand as she looked out for trouble. It wasn’t easy to imagine
