Now it was Bailey floundering in grief instead of him. She didn’t show it to everyone, but he saw it in her possessive need to stay busy. What she really needed was more time to deal with it, especially after today. He didn’t like leaving her alone when she was so emotionally drained.
He couldn’t believe Helen never told Bailey she was adopted. Everything he’d known about the woman said she valued honesty above all. He remembered when he was a kid trying to make up stories to get out of piano lessons, but she nailed him every damn time he lied. Zero tolerance for lying. That was her motto. Humph… She’d told the biggest lie—to her only child, no less.
With his guitar strapped in place, he cued the band for another song and turned back toward the crowd in front of him. These people were his friends, and he thanked the heavens he had returned to South Lake Tahoe after college instead of pursuing a recording career. Ryan had no desire to be famous; he just wanted to play. He just wanted people to listen.
When he, Wade, and Lucas had dreamed up El Lago Bar and Dock, they never imagined it would be so popular. He could play his music to a crowd of eager listeners whenever he wanted. Lucas Madden, the chef, could cook for the masses, and Wade Seymour could manage the bar and flirt with the ladies to his heart’s content.
As Ryan played, the atmosphere in the crowd felt electric, and he fought a wave of guilt, thinking about Bailey at home alone. Midway through the song, he saw her enter the club. Their eyes met, and Bailey smiled then waved at him. With her short stature, he could barely see her through the crowd. Her dark, thick, wavy hair draped her shoulders, nearly hitting her narrow waist. Her broad smile was mixed with a hint of sadness, and he wondered when the grief would subside a little and her spirit would return. It was hard to witness her sorrow. He was glad she’d gotten out after all. At least she was here at El Lago where they could keep an eye on her.
* * *
As Bailey dressed to meet her boyfriend, Dex, at El Lago, she felt like she was walking through a dream and couldn’t wake up. She knew Ryan was trying to help, but he didn’t understand. How could he? He hadn’t just found out his entire life was a lie. Not knowing where she came from and not knowing her true family history changed things for her. Not only for obvious reasons but also her own self-worth. She’d always felt secure in who she was and what she was doing with her life, and that had everything to do with having a loving and accepting family.
In her mind, she knew that hadn’t changed, but in her heart… In her heart, she felt like something was missing—or that she was just amiss.
She tried to shake off the feeling. Dex was coming. They’d been apart for several weeks, and she couldn’t wait to see him. She needed him. He missed her mother’s funeral, and that stung. Going through that without his support was tougher than she thought it would be. She had Ryan and her other friends, but she needed someone to help her forget, and that was something only a lover could do. Not that she didn’t understand why. He lived too far to just drop everything when she wanted him.
They met last fall at El Lago when Dex was visiting Lake Tahoe for a bachelor party for an old high school buddy, and they’d been dating ever since. Dex was an avid skier, so they’d spent a lot of time together over the winter when he came to ski. Dating didn’t seem like the right word, but their relationship was hard to describe. He lived a couple of hours away, so they only had weekends to spend together, but then, not even every weekend.
His visits had dwindled as winter turned into spring, and she worried that when the snow melted, so would his affection. Dex had never made a commitment to her, and, until recently, she’d been okay with that, but she’d noticed a pattern with him. Whenever they seemed to get closer, more intimate, he withdrew. He’d disappear for weeks and not stay in touch. It was if he wanted to remind her that he wasn’t committed to her. She tried not to be needy. Men hated that, and she didn’t want to be one of those women, but missing her mother’s funeral was different. How could he not be there for her when she needed him the most?
She walked into El Lago and made instant eye contact with Ryan. He was belting out a Gavin DeGraw song, which was perfectly suited for his voice…perfectly suited to his life when she thought about it. “I Don’t Want to Be” is sort of like an anthem for his life. He was who he was, and there was no changing him. He was the epitome of a reluctant rock star. The things he could do with all his talent…but that wasn’t him. He liked it here in South Lake Tahoe. He liked the smaller club crowds, and he liked peace when he wasn’t on stage.
He finished the song and said, “We’re parched up here. Hope you don’t mind if we take a break.” The playful smile at the crowd made everyone in the bar smile back at him, including Bailey. She stepped up to the bar, took a stool, and waited for him. She knew he was taking a break so he could check on her. She hadn’t talked to him since he left her mother’s house earlier after finding her baby book.
Bailey turned to see him detained by a beautiful blonde, but, to her surprise, he
