“I’d prefer to wait until after I’ve seen your test results to determine what type of physical therapy—”
“I don’t mean physical therapy. I mean sex.”
I highly doubted that under normal circumstances, a physician would blush at the mention of sex, but he and I both did with Siren’s bluntness.
“Ahem. Since you asked a direct question, I’ll do my best to answer in the same manner. As I said previously, I will not feel comfortable making a determination regarding physical activity, of any kind, until after I’ve seen the results of the scans I’ve ordered.”
“Very well, then.”
I covered my mouth with my hand to hide the smile I couldn’t keep off my face.
“If there’s nothing else, stop at the front desk and someone will get the tests scheduled along with your follow-up appointment.”
It took several minutes, but eventually, the radiology department was able to schedule Siren for two of the three tests this afternoon and the third tomorrow.
“Do you need to return to the ranch?” Siren asked after we’d left the doctor’s office.
That’s what I’d planned to do until the ramifications of her never recovering her memory hit me in the head like a steel plank. “I’m not going anywhere.”
“If you need to leave, I’ll understand. I’m sure you didn’t plan to be here more than a few hours.”
“Excuse us.” Like she had earlier, I took her hand and led her away from her nurse. However, my grasp was much gentler than hers was on mine.
“I’m staying.”
Siren turned her head away when her eyes filled with tears. “I feel like an eejit.”
I cupped her cheek with my palm. “None of this is your fault. You were shot in the line of duty.” I took a deep breath and looked up at the ceiling of the corridor. “If you want to know the truth…” I stumbled on my words, trying to mask how emotionally overcome I suddenly was. I leaned down and gently rested my forehead against hers. “I didn’t think you were going to make it.” I closed my eyes, remembering how panicked I had been in the few seconds it took me to get to her. The immediate sense of loss I felt, unnerved me then and now.
She wrapped her arms around my waist and buried her face in my chest. “I wish I could remember more about you.”
And I wished the exact opposite.
While Siren was in with Dr. Mansfield, I made arrangements for us to rent a house within walking distance of the hospital. If Siren had to be here on a regular basis, driving back and forth would wear her out. I also made sure the nurse I’d hired to travel with us was able to stay on.
“I’m happy to stay on as long as I’m needed, Mr. Torcher,” said Maureen.
With the amount of money I was paying her, that didn’t come as a surprise.
I stepped outside when my cell rang with a call from Rile. “Hello, my friend. I’m sure you know why I’m calling.”
It could be one of two reasons, and I said so.
“As much as I want you to commit to becoming an Invincibles’ partner, I’m calling for an update on Siren’s condition.”
“For your knowledge or IMI’s?”
“My own.”
“We’ll know more tomorrow after she’s undergone some tests. Any word from Hughes?”
“I was able to burn the details of von Habsburg’s escape from the mental facility. As far as Director Hughes is concerned, Siren is still on loan to MI6 until further notice.”
“What about Z?”
“He’s on board.”
Z Alexander was the current chief of MI6 and Rile’s former boss. Given the majority of assignments the Invincibles took on were on behalf of Her Majesty’s Secret Intelligence Service, it shouldn’t come as a surprise that he would keep the details of Siren’s medical condition a secret until told otherwise.
I told Rile I’d be in touch, and was headed back inside when I saw Siren coming out. She looked exhausted and as though she’d been crying.
Instinctively, I opened my arms and embraced her as she walked up to me. “We have an hour before your first scan. Would you like to lie down for a while?”
“I would. I’m so tired.”
“What is this?” she asked when I pulled up in front of the furnished rental.
“I thought this would be more comfortable than a hotel.”
“You’re a very kind man, Smoke.”
Siren had called me a lot of things in the time I’d known her. Kind had never been one of them. I wondered if she’d still think so if and when she got her memory back.
“Tomorrow morning, I’ll take you shopping,” I said when she unpacked the few things she’d brought with her. When she shrugged, I pulled her into my arms. “You’re supposed to be resting.”
I tugged her over to the bed and lay beside her. When she turned on her side, I pulled her close so her back was against my front. “Try to sleep. I’ll wake you up when it’s time to go.”
“Smoke?”
“Yeah?”
“What if it never comes back?”
I leaned down and kissed her shoulder. “Then, we’ll make lots of new memories.”
“Do you really mean that?”
“Yes.” Probably more than I’d meant anything before in my life.
12
Siren
When we left the house to return to the hospital, Smoke suggested Maureen take the afternoon off. He was able to stay with me as I waited to be taken in for each of the scans, and just knowing he was there was a comfort.
His words from last night replayed in my mind as I considered what my life would be like if I never remembered anything that had happened prior to being shot. Would making new memories be enough? Would I have a sense of myself without knowing what made me the person I was now?
“Do you feel up to having dinner with me?” Smoke asked when I came out to the waiting area after the second scan was finished. “Scratch that. Let’s do takeout instead.”
“Do I look
