“Hey, wait a second,” Abel said. “Someone’s coming.”
We all dipped from the sidewalk to the bushes as headlights approached.
The headlights turned and I watched a vehicle park.
When the headlights died, I saw it was a minivan.
My father’s minivan.
He got out of the driver’s seat.
Tall, skinny, a hat on his head. Looking the same as I remembered. The ghost and the demon that never left my soul.
He opened the side of the minivan and out came two kids.
They were maybe seven or eight.
A boy and a girl.
He high fived the boy and then messed with his hair.
When the girl got out, she offered her hand to him and he took it.
They walked across the front of the van where a woman waited for them.
She was as tall as him, with dark hair.
He stopped and kissed her.
He put his arm around her.
She put her head on his shoulder.
Then they walked to the front door of the house.
As one happy fucking family.
“Jesus, Josh,” Nash said. “I’m so sorry.”
“Do you know who they are?” Abel asked.
He was referring to the kids.
I shook my head.
That was a lie.
Their names were Danny and Amber.
They weren’t his kids. They didn’t come from him. He had two kids of his own. Well… back to just one now.
“Stay the fuck away from me,” I said as I walked away.
“Don’t burn the house down,” Abel said. “There are kids…”
I ignored them.
I wanted to burn the house down. I wanted them all to feel what I felt.
All I lost. All I never asked to have happen.
It was his fucking fault.
My hands were balled up into fists and I needed something.
A drink. A pill. Turn around and go back to Murph and steal Cassie from him because he didn’t know what he was doing with her.
Before my head could make up its mind, I saw a figure in the distance.
The silhouette of an angel that was all black.
It was Amelia.
We met each other and normally she made me feel relief.
But not tonight.
She was crying… and her lip was bleeding…
“He did this?” I asked.
“Josh… just hug me.”
I threw my arms around her and felt her crying into my chest. The anger overwhelmed me, and my eyesight went blurry. This wasn’t me though. I didn’t get like this. I took action. I didn’t just sit around and cry like a baby.
All that shit was left for at home. I had been there before. I’d watched it over and over. And it changed nothing.
Amelia broke the hug and looked up at me. “It’s not what you think.”
“It looks exactly like what I think.”
“I got away.”
“But you can’t stay away.”
“I can live somewhere else.”
“You deserve better than this shit,” I said.
“Just walk me home. Like you did before.”
“What if he’s there?”
“He won’t be,” Amelia said. “He does this all the time. He gets worked up and then leaves. Mom says it’s his guilt. I think that’s why she stays. She thinks his guilt is some kind of sign of love.”
“Fuck that.”
“I agree,” she said.
I grabbed her hand. “I’ll take you home.”
We walked in silence all the way back to her house.
It was the same as before.
Sneaking through the dirty and smelly house.
It seemed worse than before.
Up the stairs and into her bedroom.
She got into the bed and pulled the covers up to her chin. I took my spot on the corner of the bed and sat there. My mind swirled with the kind of speed that started to make my stomach sick. The sight of Murph trying to kiss a girl. The sight of my father with his new family. The sight of Amelia with blood on her lip. She didn’t want to tell me the story and I wasn’t going to ask her to tell me either. There was no need. I knew the story.
I had lived that story before…
There was a noise downstairs. Outside.
I checked to make sure Amelia was asleep before leaving the room.
I moved through the house with speed and went to the front door.
When I opened it, I saw Amelia’s father.
Stumbling and struggling to get up the concrete steps.
It took him a few seconds to realize I was standing there.
“Who the fuck are you?” he growled, his eyes rolling in their sockets.
“You fucking hit them?”
“What? I’m calling the cops. This is my house.”
“You touch Amelia again and I’ll kill you.”
He grabbed the railing with both hands and was on the second to top step. “The fuck… you’re just a boy. A boy in my house? She’s a slut like her mother.”
That was all I needed to hear.
I lunged forward, ready to do what I said I was going to do.
“Josh, don’t!”
I looked back and Amelia stood at the open front door.
Her father started to laugh. “Fucking useless. All of you. I never wanted this. So, I’ll fix it.”
“Please, don’t,” Amelia said. “He’ll hurt himself.”
“Fine,” I said. “Goodnight, Amelia. But he can’t keep this up. I won’t allow it.”
“Goodbye, lover boy,” her father said in a slurred voice that sounded like luuhherboiii.
I took one step forward and as I stepped down, I accidentally bumped my shoulder into his.
Almost instantly, his hands broke free of the railing and he was falling backward. He tried to hit a step and missed. He crumpled down the concrete steps, hitting them one at a time until he landed down on the sidewalk. On his side, groaning in pain, his eyes shut.
“Is he dead?” Amelia asked.
“No. Just dead drunk. He won’t remember a thing in the morning.” I looked back at her again. “Do you want me to bring him inside?”
“No,” she said. “Let him sleep out here.”
“You deserve so much better than this life,” I said.
I made it down one step before Amelia said my name.
I turned one more time and she was right there. Almost my height because I was down a few steps.
The look in her eyes was the only hope I was able to feel in a long time.
“Thank you,”
