“Caulder’s?”
I smiled, thinking about my little, insignificant bar. “Caulder’s has been the only thing I’ve been passionate about in years. It’s time I dedicated more hours to it.”
“You’ve never run the drugs through there, if you want a clean slate, your bar is perfect.” Lev rubbed his bony thumb over his lip before talking again. “You take nothing belonging to the organisation. If you sever ties, I won’t tolerate any direct competition, do you understand? I can’t guarantee anything, but I can put out the word you are to be left in peace, that you’re a protected man.”
“Thank you, it’s all I ask.”
“I make no promises, Yannick. You know this world better than anyone, dog eat dog, people have long memories and sometimes when they see an opportunity, they’re going to take it no matter what. You are a well-liked man, despite your reputation, perhaps with my warnings and the charismatic charm you’ve wielded over the years, it will be enough to grant you what you seek.” It all sounded fair enough, and at the least, I had the go ahead from the person who mattered the most, who could make it happen.
Lev signalled to Sergey, who got up and left the room, only to return a moment later with a big brown envelope in his hand. He placed it in the middle of the table, then took his seat again.
“Recompense.” Lev pointed to the envelope. “Monetary recompense for fifteen years.”
Shoving my hand roughly through my hair, I stood up abruptly, aggravated Lev was insulting me with a pocket full of cash. “I wanted the life you stole from me, not money in my bank. Am I rich? Yes, I am thanks to the organisation but is my heart rich, like it should be? No!” I shouted, angrily. “Yosef was not a nice man, but he didn’t deserve to die by my hand, I didn’t deserve what you all did to me. I was weak, scared, and would have done anything any of you asked, especially my father. You painted a picture like it was me or Yosef when any other arrangement would have been healthier, there were any amount of different ways which would not have ended with Yosef dying in my arms, blood pouring out of his head. I had a life, Lev, and you all but ripped my dreams from my throat and stuck the knife in with Irina just to be sure. I have little sanity left, and what is will always, always be tainted with Yosef. I live with him, day in and day out while you pull our strings and forget the sacrifices we made to get there. I want out,” I bellowed, “Out of it all. I can’t believe I had to come up here and play nice, get your permission,” I huffed, fist clenched atop the table as I glared down at a man I most definitely hated almost as much as I’d hated my father. “Recompense for fifteen years you say?” I barked out a caustic laugh. “A fucking joke if you ask me.”
“Sit down!” Lev roared, banging his fist on the table, his face red, his thin body shaking.
And that’s when I looked at him, really looked at him. There sat a man who truly had little life left in him, he was old, lines etched in his weathered skin, and he wasn’t half the terrifying thing I’d been afraid of for all those years. I could see a threat coming a mile away and it was just now occurring to me that Lev was no longer the man who could put the fear of God in me. He hadn’t been for a long time, and my indignation felt thoroughly justified. I had a right to my anger, to voice it at this very table, to the source of every fucking thing that had ever been done to me. Mad as hell, I parked my butt back on the seat, waiting for more of the twisted words and excuses I was tired of hearing.
“This isn’t just about you. As much as you dislike Irina, she’s my granddaughter and my priority. Lord knows I haven’t done the best by her, so we’re both going to cut her some slack while you make your arrangements. I want you face to face with our associates and telling them they no longer deal with Yannick Ischmov, that they can deal with your other men in the interim. This is a headache for me, one I can ill afford, and I will not lie to you any longer. Of course I foresaw this, Yannick, and I’m in the process of finding an appropriate substitute.”
“For years I wished it had been me standing in Yosef’s place. Do you know that?”
“You’re right when you say we wronged you, that you have suffered an injustice, many in fact. You were a good boy back then but listen to me when I say you’re a better man now, ten times the man Yosef would or could have ever been. Yes, your time has come to an end. I grant you as safe a passage as I can, it’s the best I can do.”
I sat there, studying my hands, finding it hard to see the better man in myself. Bitter, yes. Better? No. My bluster and anger simmered down a notch, if only to walk out of there without doing anything stupid. “I’m sorry, forgive me for speaking out of turn.”
“There’s nothing to forgive, son. The indiscretions are all mine, it is I who should apologise to you. Take the money, please. From the day you signed that immoral contract, it has been waiting for you, it’s the least you deserve and about all I can offer in the way of an apology.” Lev shifted uncomfortably in his seat then looked me dead in the eye. “I was
