There was nothing about her words meant to comfort me. They were said for her, for her situation, and nothing about them was intended to make me feel better. But I still felt some of the pressure ease around my chest.
From behind Magnolia, my dad gave me an uneasy smile, clearly not wanting to interrupt. Of course, he wouldn't, I thought, this was his boss' daughter, and if those women had heard about what happened, he'd probably heard the same.
Facebook had nothin’ on the way information traveled in a small town.
Before I could think twice about it, I leaned forward and gave her a tight hug. “Drink a lot of water and take two Advil after you’re done with that wine.”
At first, she patted my back. It was such an awkward pat too, that I tried not to panic laugh before I pulled away. Then she softened into my embrace and let out a shuddering exhale. Her face was curious when she answered. “I will.”
Magnolia gave me a small smile as I walked away. The women from before hit me with some mighty dirty looks when my dad and I got in line to check out, and it took everything in me not to channel LA Grace.
The Grace that Tucker met when he offered to help me.
That thought didn't give me any sort of sweet memories, because I'd never be able to repress the memories of how awful I was to him, even if it had felt out of my control.
Me and Tucker and Magnolia swirled messily in my head while we went back to my dad's apartment where Grady was waiting for us. Had he really broken up with her right after our meeting at the fairground? The interaction had been significant to me, certainly, but maybe … just maybe I hadn’t been alone in that.
Somehow, I managed small talk as we grilled up some slightly mushy zucchini and overcooked chicken. My dad didn't hate the veggies, and if I was distracted enough for him to notice, he didn't say anything about it.
After the dishes were cleaned up, my overwrought brain moved to Rose Buchanan and her red book, and I wondered what would have happened if her Joseph had been with someone else when they met. If he'd had another sweetheart, would she have moved on to someone else? Would she have been happy?
I'd never believed in fate, that there was a predestined path for our life. People had a choice, we made decisions and lived with the consequences, but there were so many directions that we could go, so many things we could do, places we could live, people we could love.
But as Grady and I drove home, and I told him I wanted to get some work done on my laptop before disappearing into the garage apartment, I thought about Tucker, and imagined what it would feel like if I drove away from Green Valley and never saw him again.
According to something Levi said, it was the life that my oldest cousin Hunter was living. Married to someone that he wasn't destined to love, someone else that didn’t hold his entire heart.
Someone less.
That was my next thought. I didn't know who Hunter had loved when he was in Green Valley. I didn't know his wife now. But when I tried to imagine someone other than Tucker for me, it immediately felt like they would have to be less.
Less good.
Less kind.
Less handsome.
Less thoughtful.
Less perfect for me.
While photos from the hike downloaded onto my laptop, I pulled open my phone and considered the wisdom of reaching out to him.
He'd broken up with his girlfriend, by all accounts, in between the times I'd seen him yesterday.
We met at the fairgrounds, I practically spilled my cursed heart onto the ground in front of him, he looked at me like he wanted to snatch me to him and eat me whole, he broke up with his long-term girlfriend, and then he saved me from a wayward croissant.
I rubbed at my forehead and tried to remember if anything stuck out to me from that brief slip of time at Donner Bakery.
Croissant.
Choking.
Hand smacking.
Water.
Tucker.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. His face came into my mind, as sharp and clear as if he was standing in front of me.
Those remarkable eyes took me in, and yes, he'd been concerned. But there was something else, tickling on the edge of my mind as I remembered our interaction.
A warmth behind the concern, as he looked at me. Happiness. I pressed a hand to my heart.
Interest. Attraction. Fascination.
All of it had been there. Something I hadn't known to look for, because he was him. And if I knew anything about him, it was that Tucker was a good man. He wouldn't have allowed that to come through so visibly, so clearly unchained, if he hadn't been free to do so.
I blew a raspberry through my lips and pulled up his number, carefully changing his contact info to his full name. No more hiding behind his initials.
To text or not to text, I mused, rubbing my thumb over his name once it was saved.
My phone vibrated, eliciting a surprised squeak.
Incoming call- Tucker Haywood
My heart took off with so much raw, unharnessed power, I could've lit the Vegas strip.
"Oh, fuck you, you stupid southern curse."
I took a deep, steadying breath, and answered the call.
"Hey," I said, tucking the phone between my cheek and my shoulder.
"Grace."
Goosebumps everywhere, from the sound of his voice saying my name. They chased each other up my arms and down my spine, lifting hairs as they went. Five silly letters had never sounded the way they did when his deep, deep voice curled around my name.
"That's, that's me," I answered weakly. Then I pinched my eyes shut in embarrassment. "Um, what can I do for you?"
The smile in his voice was clear when he answered, probably because
