It's amazing,
When the moment arrives that you know you'll be alright.”
Performed by Aerosmith
Written by Supa / Tyler
When the grandfather clock chimed eleven, Dani covered yet another yawn. We were still in the library because Carson and I were trying to finish a game we’d started the night before. It was slow-going because we’d gotten back in the habit of reading each other’s tactics as if they were our own. Regret filled me because I’d denied him this simple pleasure, childishly and stupidly, for too long. I’d hurt myself as much as him by the rejection, because strategizing with him was what had cut me into the mold of a SEAL long before I’d ever enrolled in the academy. He’d shaped me more than my father had.
Maribelle broke our silence. “Nash and Dani have to be up early to catch their flight to L.A. Might I suggest you pick up the game the next time he’s here?”
It had been three years since I’d come back this last time. While I hadn’t committed anything to Carson in my time at the offices, I knew I’d raised his hopes by simply being there. Worse, I’d done more than just soak in information. Instead, I’d asked questions and offered opinions. I’d acted like I belonged.
Going back to the SEALs had seemed like the only route for so long that it had actually become a burden I hadn’t realized I was carrying. But in a matter of two weeks, doors and windows had begun to open around me. Possibilities. But just like the strategies on the chessboard in front of us, I had to spend some time considering them before I made a sudden move that I’d regret in years to come. Before I took the straight path and got lost again.
Regardless of my decisions about my future, I knew it would not be three years before I came home again. The part of me which had loved running through the fields and running up the grand staircase shimmering with color had finally been reawakened.
Tristan’s basement was not my only home.
“I was thinking I might be back for Thanksgiving.” I said the words without having considered them, but the moment they were out, I knew them for the truth they were. It would mean coming home in a few weeks instead of a few years, and I suddenly wanted that more than I’d ever thought I would.
Carson grinned, Maribelle smiled, and when I looked at Dani, she was practically glowing. My regrets and burdens lifted ever so slightly, reminding me of the vase of flowers Dani had given me. The ones sending me a message of love.
It hit me so hard in my chest I wasn’t sure I could breathe.
I was loved.
I’d been blind to it for years. The love Darren and Tristan had given me as a brother and a friend. The love Maribelle had for me as a grandson. Even the love Carson had wanted to give to me that I’d rejected.
I didn’t want to cast it off any longer.
I wanted to soak in every uttered word and touch, but I also wanted to give it back. To show it. To say the words to Dani. I just wasn’t sure what would happen once I did. She had cut open my chest and shoved a new heart inside. One that wasn’t charred. One that was red and pink and shiny and new. It would bleed out if anything happened to it.
♫ ♫ ♫
Driving the rental car back to Tallahassee broke the dreamworld I’d been living in with Dani at Wellsley Place. Suddenly, I was forced back to being on high alert. Noises were overloading me, requiring me to filter through them for the biggest threats, as I guided her through the busy airport security, using the pre-approved TSA lines with my military ID.
Walking through the airport with Dani was like walking with a celebrity. She was gorgeous, drawing looks with her confident stride and the glow that seemed to emanate from around her.
“I should have made you put on a bag and a mask,” I said with a growl after shooting daggers at yet another man who was staring at her, even with my hand tangled in hers.
“What? Why?” she said with a laugh.
I stopped in the middle of the walkway, not giving a shit about the comments people made as they were forced to go around us. I pulled her face to mine and kissed her until she was breathless just to make sure I could still do it. To prove it hadn’t been a dream which I’d lived alone. She returned my kiss with ferocity, and I comforted myself with the thought that she needed the reassurance as much as I did.
“I might lose my control if another person looks at you,” I told her truthfully.
She laughed. “It’s you they’re looking at, Otter. Remember, you’re the calendar model for the SEALs.”
I couldn’t help the snort that left my body. “I should never have told you that.”
“Too late. I even have some feelers out to get my own personal copy. You can sign it for me.”
My snort turned to a full-on laugh, and we made our way to the gate.
Once we were seated in the first-class seats Alice had booked for us, the mixed sense of reluctance and anticipation which had been pooling inside my stomach returned. I was back on a mission—the most important mission I’d ever been on, because the person being protected was Dani.
Malone and Garner had been sending me daily updates on the plans for the awards ceremony. It had included the floor plans to the theater where the ceremony was taking place and the five-star hotel next door where we would be staying. I’d memorized every possible detail of the terrain, and every time I’d found another possible opening for Fiona, I’d sent it to them.
Malone, Garner, and Tanner had started protesting, stating there was no way Fiona was going
