Alex: Hey yeah, why? Everything ok?
I quickly type my reply and start to make my way upstairs to bed, not before checking the back door is securely locked once more.
Logan: I just wanted to say goodnight, and sorry I had to rush off like I did.
Alex: Don’t worry about rushing off. Your dad needed you. Hope everything was ok when you got home.
Logan: It wasn’t, but it’s sorted enough for now. Can I see you tomorrow?
Alex: I thought you were picking me up for school? Did I make a mistake?
Logan: No, I am picking you up, but I just meant could I see you after school, just us?
Alex: oh ok, but I can’t straight after school I already told Chris I would do something with him.
Logan: O' Connor?
Maybe I shouldn’t have mentioned Chris....
Logan: I thought we discussed O' Connor?
Alex: No we didn’t discuss anything. You kissed me and then said some stuff and I maybe just about managed to nod my head.
Logan: That good of a kiss huh?
Well yes it was actually but there is no way I’m letting him know that. But this does confirm that I do need to talk to him more about what he meant when he said what he did.
Alex: Goodnight Logan. We can talk tomorrow x
Logan: Good night Alexia x
Logan: And yes we will talk and discuss some things tomorrow. See you bright and early x
I thought I had remembered things wrong when I thought back to how serious he was when he had said that Chris or anyone else couldn’t have me. Maybe I wasn’t. We really do need to have a chat. I’ve made a friend in Chris and I’m not ready to let that friendship go, so Logan is just going to have to learn to deal with it somehow because I’m not sure I’m ready to let Logan go either.
Chapter Twelve
Never Forget
My alarm goes off and I am unusually happy to get out of bed. I usually just want to stay under the covers and keep pressing snooze; but then I remember that Logan is coming to pick me up for school and although we had a slightly awkward text last night about a little chat we need to have, I am really looking forward to seeing him. I take the few steps it takes me to walk over to my balcony doors and open them up to take a look outside to see what the clouds have decided to do today.
When I open them however I’m reminded of the grey wolf from last night and I find myself starting to look around for him. I make up my mind that I wont let it bother me today, and put it down to a strange occurrence that was a one off. I head straight to my bathroom and go do waht I need to.
When I’m ready, I head downstairs to start the coffee machine and grab some breakfast. I leave a note for aunt Sara too. Just saying hi and telling her that I won’t be straight back after school tonight, and I’ll sort my own dinner out.
I’m nervous.
About getting in a car and driving again tonight.
I’m nervous.
About getting in a car with Chris, and Logan finding out and going crazy again.
But I’m also looking forward to driving again. I think. I may change my mind when I’m sat in the drivers seat. It’s been a few nights since I had my last bad dream about my parent; I’ve definitely been having them less since I’ve moved here, so maybe that’s a sign that I am ready to start driving again and I'm slowly dealing with their death.
My phone goes off and I assume its Logan telling me he is on his way, but its not. It’s from Chris.
Chris: Hey Gorgeous, we still good for after school? Want to grab something to eat after?
How did my life suddenly get complicated? It’s my life. So why do I keep thinking that if I do one thing it’s going to upset someone else, so I shouldn’t do it; but I’m not doing anything wrong.
Am I?
I’ve never been one of those girls that have guy issues. I’ve had plenty of guys ask me out but I never had a problem telling them to back off and that I wasn’t interested. All of my closer friends back home were girls, so again no issues there; but I also don’t want to string someone along if I’m not interested in anything more than friendship.
Is that what I’m doing with Chris?
If I had to choose between Logan and Chris of who I would date, I wouldn’t even have to think about my answer.
It would be Logan.
But that doesn’t mean that I don’t want to be friends with Chris. I don’t think I’ve ever had a friendship develop so quick with anyone like it has done with Chris. I don’t know how to describe it. I like spending time with him. He is funny and makes me laugh and smile and feel light hearted. He makes me forget the things that plague me in my dreams. I trust him.
But I know he wants more than what I want from our friendship. Is it bad of me to keep on being friends with him? Does it make me selfish? Am I
