“Can’t say I’ve any experience of kids, let alone teenagers, but I’ve dealt with more than enough prospects in my time. Doesn’t sound much different, except for the mood swings, perhaps. They are all youngsters who think they know it all and won’t be guided.”
Again, he makes me chuckle. “Got any tips?”
He snorts loudly. “Well, telling her she won’t get her patch probably won’t work, and my second go-to if that doesn’t get results is using my fists, so I think you’re on your own there.”
“You sound like you’re quite the violent man, Grumbler.” It’s something I wouldn’t say to his face.
He takes it as though I meant it as a compliment. “I’m the sergeant-at-arms, Mary. That means I need to make club members stick to the rules as I’m responsible for the safety of the club. If someone steps out of line, they need to be educated, and if it’s a situation where words aren’t going to do the trick, then the point needs to be driven home some other way. Wouldn’t be in the role I am if I weren’t prepared to back up what I say with action.” I ponder that, but it’s so far removed from my existence, it makes me shiver. If someone does something wrong where I work, they get a reprimand. If it’s serious, they might get suspended or fired. I try to picture Art using his fists and know he’s incapable.
“Mary.” All mirth has gone from Grumbler’s voice. “I have never, ever hit a woman, or a man who didn’t deserve it.”
I’m driven to ask. “What if a woman deserves it?”
“I’ve never had a woman to call mine, but if I did, and she did something way out of line, I’d cut her out of my life. I’d never raise my fists to her. That answer your question, doll?”
I suppose that it does.
“I’m being called, I have to go. I’ll text Alicia the book titles and authors, and I’ll catch up with you when there’s news. Oh and get my number from Alicia and text me with yours. I’d prefer to call you direct.”
“I will. Thanks, Grumbler.”
He stays on the line. “Mary, um, if Alicia’s being a pain and you want to vent, I’m happy to give you sergeant-at-arms tips for dealing with it.” Now he’s chuckling again. “You’ll have my number. Don’t be afraid to use it.”
I end the call and return the device to Alicia. As predicted, her face lights up when she hears she’s on more covers. The phone pings with a text as soon as I’ve handed it to her. Leaving her in her room, I return to the kitchen while musing over what a strange conversation that had been.
Taking a cut of beef out of the fridge, I begin to prepare dinner. Working on automatic pilot, thoughts go through my head. When I’d lost Dave, I thought my world had come to an end, but I had to go on. I had Alicia to care for. At ten, she’d been devastated by the sudden loss of the only man in her life and focusing on easing her pain had helped me deal with my own.
The first couple of years had been hard. Who would have expected a forty-year-old, seemingly healthy and fit man to be struck down by a brain aneurysm? One day he was there; the next, he was gone. Without Alicia, I don’t think I could have survived.
My life wasn’t exceptional. I’d gotten a degree and had made the most of my time in college. I hadn’t been a virgin when I’d met Dave, but then, neither had he. It wasn’t something either of us had expected. But once I’d met him, all my previous lovers had faded in comparison. Dave and I had just fit, both mentally and sexually.
I’d been twenty-seven when I’d met the love of my life, coincidentally the same age as he. We’d married within a year, then waited another couple to start a family. It hadn’t taken me long to fall pregnant, and Alicia had been enough to make our family complete. We’d had a good marriage. Of course there’d been disagreements along the way, but we’d always made up and found some middle ground. I’d had no thought in my head other than we were going to grow old together. We’d had plans, dreams. All shattered when that massive bleed on the brain took him away from me.
My bed had felt empty with no one to cuddle me, no one to share my triumphs, or steady me again when I’d butt heads with my daughter and no one to take the burden from me. Sex? Well, yes. I missed that as well. Though we’d settled to being intimate on a weekly schedule rather than the spontaneity of the earlier days of our relationship, it was enough to satisfy me.
But most of all, I missed his company. Missed having someone to talk to. If I had a bad or good day at work, if Alicia had scored highly on a test, or, if she was challenging me, there was no one with whom I could share. Oh, I had friends, good friends too. Women who’d be there for me, who’d come around when I was at my lowest point, bringing a bottle of wine to pull me out of my misery, but it wasn’t the same.
Encouraged by said friends, Terra and Kristen, I eventually dipped my toe into the dating pool again. But I’d never found anyone to fill the hole Dave left in my life or come anywhere close to it.
Having Alicia in my life is a blessing, or so I remind myself, but her existence had definitely turned off a few men.
It’s been a year since I last dated. I thought I’d made a good choice—he was a banker, good-looking, clever and kind. The type who’d send me flowers and chocolate. I’d felt spoiled by his attention. If it
