He regards her for a moment. “Didn’t matter. I was in possession.”
“You were arrested?”
He shakes his head. “One of the cops, he was a friend, a very good friend of my mother’s, if you get what I mean. He’d been inside watching the show. He knew it wasn’t mine as it was a bass guitar. Tried to get me to tell them whose it was, they needed me to say it. But you don’t rat on a friend, you know?”
“Did you go to prison?” Alicia’s eyes are wide.
“Nah. That’s when I was given the choice of a trip to the cells or to the recruiting office. He didn’t do that for me, of course, he did it for my mother. Still, he gave me the choice, and I chose the latter.”
“And the band? Did they split up?”
Grumbler half smiles. “See? That’s when I found what true friends are. Rod hadn’t betrayed me, he’d betrayed us all. There wasn’t going to be a place for him anymore. Instead of finding two new members, they broke up the band. Fagan continued playing drums, but not with the calibre of bands like ours had been. Jon Boy left to do some sessions down in LA.” Jon Boy, I grin to myself. He’s the same age as me, but he’s not lost his full handle along the way.
“But you still play?” I ask. It’s obvious. You don’t pick up a guitar after forty years and remember the skills.
“Sure, but for myself. Got a couple of guitars back at my place.”
“At the club?”
“Nah. I got a house. Not somewhere I really go, just when I need space to unwind. That’s when I play.”
That’s what he was doing tonight. The music hadn’t been for my benefit, but for his. I’m not complaining.
“Do you ever see the men in the band?”
I nod. “Yeah. A few years back, I bumped into Fagan. He said Jon Boy was local, and we got together to jam. They’d met up with a guy, Kurt, who joined us on bass. I meet up with them from time to time.”
Alicia’s attention span is limited. Seeing the end to the sharing has passed, she turns to me. “Got anything to eat, Mom?”
“In the cupboard, I’m sure.”
When she goes, I stand and go toward Grumbler, placing my hand on his shoulder, saying quietly, “I bet you got all the girls with a voice and talent like that.”
He chuckles softly. “That would be telling.” His eyes sharpen and seem to pierce me. “What I want to know, is whether I’ve still got what it takes?”
It’s my turn to chuckle, well, it’s more of a giggle. “Seems you have, old man. Seems you have.” I wink at him.
“Christ woman.” He grabs hold of my hand. “It’s a fuckin’ shame you’ve got a teenage daughter living here.”
Alicia walks back into view carrying a slice of leftover pizza, a large portion of which is in her mouth. With the result, I have to ask her to repeat what she just said.
“I asked if Grumbler’s going to sleep in your bed again tonight.”
How the hell did she know that he had? I don’t deny it. “The couch is far too small for him.” I wave to indicate his size. “We’re adults. Nothing happened.”
She nods. “I noticed he wasn’t on the couch when I got up to get some water, but I know there’s nothing to worry about. You’re far too old, not like Marisa’s parents. She has to wear earplugs to bed at night.”
My mouth opens and shuts. Worried, I glance at Grumbler but he’s staring up at the ceiling, his body vibrating slightly as though he’s trying hard not to laugh.
“Anyway, I’m off to bed. Night.”
Eventually, Grumbler lowers his chin and his gaze captures mine. Smirking, broadly, he murmurs, “Is it bad that I kinda want to prove her wrong?”
Would Grumbler make me scream? I gaze at his bare arms covered in tattoos, suddenly having the urge to see if he’s got them elsewhere. I can tell he’s muscular but lean by the way his t-shirt clings. His beard, hell. I’d always wanted Dave to grow one, but he never had. It’s not bushy, but short and neatly trimmed. Then there are his eyes. When I’m subjected to the full force of his orbs staring into mine, it’s like I’m being pierced by laser beams. I know, without even experiencing it, that sex with Grumbler would be the real deal. He’d be focused on me completely.
Am I woman enough to survive?
“We can’t.” I’d scar my daughter forever. It’s bad enough she knows we’ve shared the same bed.
Chapter Thirty
Grumbler
Too old are we?
Maybe I am. But not Mary. To me she’s a woman in her prime. She makes me feel youthful, almost a teen. The thought of being naked with her makes my cock harden until it feels like a rod of steel, pulsing almost painfully as precum leaks out, making my boxer shorts sticky. I haven’t had this strong a reaction to a woman in years.
But her daughter is in the next room. I should let her sleep, just as I had last night. Perhaps it’s because I know a sexual release would ease the soul deep ache inside me, wash the horrors of the day away. But not with anyone, only with her. I suspect, losing myself in her would save me. Selfish? Maybe.
How quiet could Mary be?
I’m driven to find out. Driven to see if I can make this woman cover her mouth to smother her screams. I have no doubt she’ll be crying out. I have confidence in my skills, and just like playing the guitar, doubt I’ve forgotten them. Over the years, I’ve mapped every part of a woman’s anatomy, know all the various pleasure points and what buttons to push.
I’d picked up the guitar for myself, using, as I so often have, music to quiet the demons in my head. I’d played only for
