The second thing she thought about was how long it'd take her to reach for the knife in her boot and stick it right through his jugular. He'd bleed out in minutes. She'd get the knife there before he could even put his hands up.
She stepped aside to let him in. She still hadn't made her mind up yet.
He watched her a little wearily, but he came inside.
"I know you're mad at me," he said.
"I'm not mad," she said.
"What?"
"I'm not mad. You brought my mother to me. I'm not mad."
"But-"
"But nothing, Ben. There's no point in talking about why you didn't tell them that we were okay. That we weren't being held prisoner. Why do you let all those innocent people get killed.”
"Aria, I did it because-"
"Because you love me?" she asked. She let out a bitter laugh, "You don't know anything about love, Ben. You're too selfish to know what love is. And bitter. I mean, that's why you did it, right?"
"No, Aria, I'm not-"
"Yes, you are. You're a fucking coward. And you were selfish and bitter. You lost me to Lex. You lost Mara to Grace. That must've driven you mad, right? That you lost both of us to them?"
"I don't care about-"
"Yes, you do," she said, cutting him off again. No, she wouldn't kill him. And she knew she'd never convince him that she was on their side. There was no point in trying. But she could hit him where it hurt. She could make him feel as awful as she felt.
"That's why you did it. You wanted us to lose them, to lose this place. Maybe you thought we'd even be on your side?"
"Aria, please just let me explain-"
"No, Ben. I don't care what you say. I don't care what you do. You're nothing but a petty, stupid coward. You're not a good person; you aren't even a man. You're just some jealous idiot that got a lot of innocent people killed. And for what? I will never be with you. Mara will never be with you. You're gonna die alone, like the selfish little coward that you are."
He looked hurt, very hurt. It made Aria feel better.
And maybe that made her a bad person. But she didn't care. She'd been so angry, so upset for the past 24 hours that the satisfaction running through her veins pushed all thoughts of human decency from her mind.
"I wore that nightgown for him, you know," she said. She wasn't even sure what she was trying to do anymore. All she knew was that his pain was easing some of hers. "You remember? That pretty black one? Yeah. I wore it. And he fucked me in it. Right through those doors there," she said, pointing towards their bedroom. "And he was so good. So much better than you were. I saw stars, you know? I really did."
Ben shook his head in disgust. He didn't have anything to say after that. He left, and she let him. Knowing that he'd be thinking about what she said for the rest of the day.
It made her happier than it should have.
That night, she had her first meeting with Warren.
He asked about the other villages. About the people. About everything, really. And she told him enough to be convincing, but not really anything that would be of use to him. And she neglected to mention that a few of the other villages were much bigger than the one below them. She wanted him to underestimate them. Their numbers had to be a secret
He seemed genuinely pleased by her cooperation.
She seemed to have him fooled for now, and that was good. Because they couldn't take this place. If they had all come here together, maybe things could have been different. She was sure that Lex would have taken them in. But they didn't give him the opportunity to do so.
The whole situation was one big mess. But Aria knew she had to find her way out of it.
Chapter 42
The next morning, she joined the others in the throne room. Warren had them all assigned to different positions.
Mara, Isla, and Martinez were all assigned to the guard. They were stationed at different positions, but they each now had access to a gun. Adrian had asked for a job guarding the weapons in the training area, and Warren agreed. But he would be joined by two of Warren's men, so Aria wasn't sure how they would sneak anything out of there with the two of them being around at all times.
"Hey, it's not ideal," Mara said after Adrian had told them. "But it's something."
It's not enough, Aria thought. The others were given various other jobs, but no positions that Aria thought would help their plan to overthrow Warren.
"I hope you're all rested," Warren said from the front of the room. He had taken Lex's spot at the front table. Watching him and his council sit where she, Lex, and Grace had sat made Aria feel sick.
But she kept her anger at bay. She couldn't let her emotions come through; she had a part to play. So with that in mind, she turned and gave Warren her attention.
"The land here is better than we could have expected. There is plenty of space to farm, fresh water, and livestock. For right now, we will remain on the palace grounds and the palace grounds only. That is an order. Do not go past the limits. I will be sending a party to search the woods and make sure that no others have gotten too close for comfort."
"What about when the rest of our people come?" someone in the crowd asked. "This place isn't big enough to hold all of us?"
"When the others come, we will expand," Warren said.
Aria looked over at her mother, sitting on the other
