“It felt right.” He put his arm around her waist and drew her toward the lighthouse where he’d set up a picnic under the shelter of the old lighthouse porch.
“Hang on. Is that our old blanket?” She looked at him with her mouth open, eyes wide.
“Yes. I couldn’t bear to throw it out when I went to college. And when I came back, it was stored at Dad’s with the rest of my gear. Call me sentimental, but the early years here with you was the best part of my life. I had to cling to what I had.”
“I never thought you were that sentimental.”
“Where you’re concerned, yes.” He guided her over to the blanket and tugged her hand until she sat beside him. “I’m sorry about the last few weeks.”
“You don’t have to apologize. I know there were things you had to deal with in your own time. I had no right to push you.”
He skimmed his hand under her chin, down her throat. She had such perfect skin. “Yes, you do. If left to my own devices, I’d still be hiding behind my mother’s death. I know that now thanks to my father and Bradley. In my mind it all made sense to send the expectant mothers to the mainland to have their babies so I wouldn’t have to deal with the possibility of something going wrong, but it wasn’t fair on everyone else.”
“Understandable after what you went through though.” She gazed at him with such love in her eyes, Drew felt humbled and more determined than ever to make her his once again.
“Perhaps, but if it wasn’t for you, I’d still be in denial. You always did make the most sense out of the two of us.”
“We make a great team.”
“We do and I’m glad you said that because I want to marry you, April.”
She shook her head. “No, you don’t. You only think you do. There’s so much you don’t know about me anymore, Drew. I’m not the right girl for you. It’s taken me a while to accept that, but I know I’m right. You deserve better.”
“No, I don’t. You’re all I need.”
“Can’t we leave things as they are? I’m not asking for more than that.”
The troubled look in her eyes upset him. There wasn’t anyone else he wanted to be with. “I don’t agree. There’s nothing you can say that will change my mind, April.”
She pulled her hand away and clambered to her feet, a sob in her voice. “Oh, don’t be too sure about that.”
Drew hurried after her as she stumbled across the lawn and down the sandy track that led to the beach. “April, wait!”
She was almost at the water’s edge when he caught up with her. He grabbed her hand and pulled her around so he could hold her against his chest. Tears streaked down her face. “Tell me what’s wrong?”
“I’m a horrible person. I’m not the nice little girl that you used to know.”
“We’ve both grown up since then.”
“But you didn’t grow up nasty.” She sniffed and leaned against him hiding her face in his neck.
How was he going to convince her she wasn’t the person she thought she was? April was a great nurse and superb mother. There wasn’t anything she could say that would make him change his mind. He had to convince her of that.
“Listen, how about you tell me the worst thing you’ve done and we can toss it in the waves, okay?”
Her shoulders trembled before a muffled voice reached his ears. “We’re not kids anymore. That won’t work.”
Drew pushed her away, looked into her face. “How do you know?”
“Remember what Leo said? Mothers know everything.”
“I may or may not concede that point, but not until you tell me what has you so convinced you’re evil.”
Her eyes clouded over with pain. “You’ll never look at me the same way again. I don’t know if I can handle that.”
“Try me.”
She took a fortifying breath. “Rob threatened suicide on more than one occasion. In fact, he used it to keep me where he wanted me. He knew if he threatened to kill himself I would stay and take more of his violence.” The tip of her tongue swiped around her lips and she swallowed. “One day it got too much. I’d left by then, run to a shelter with the children. He got my phone number, not sure how, but he did and called me. Threatened to do something if I didn’t bring his children back. Said I could go to hell, but I wasn’t taking the kids with me.”
Drew’s stomach dropped knowing what was coming. He held her tight, tucked her face into his neck and held onto her.
“I told him…I told him to do whatever he had to do because I wasn’t bringing the kids back to him.” She gulped down a breath and let out a strangled sob. “The police called me the following day.” Sobs wracked her body.
How could any man do that to his wife? Drew understood better than she thought. It was a common ploy in family violence. Do this or I’ll do that scenario. I often worked well, but had disastrous consequences for the wife and children. She wasn’t to blame and now he had to convince her to believe that.
Drew held her while she sobbed in pain. Eventually her cries subsided to small hiccups which slowed to deep uneven breaths.
“Okay now?” He lifted her chin, kissed the tears drying on her cheeks.
April shook her head.
“Leo was wrong. You don’t always know what’s right. I don’t hate you, April. I love you more than ever for standing up for your children, for not giving in to his demands which could easily have put you in more danger.” He kissed the tip of her nose, looked into the dark depths of her eyes.
“I have limited experience with depression but I know this. If you’d gone
