“I should have stayed.” Anguish laced her words. “If I had, she’d be alive today. I let her down, Frederick, don’t you see? I ran away, took a new life and eventually a new name and didn’t give her another thought.” She screwed her face up and huge sobs racked her body. Father helped her up and led her out. Billie could hear him soothing her as they disappeared down the corridor.
“Billie, are you sure you’re okay?” Hamish wiped his finger under her eye, catching a tear before it fell.
She gazed up at him. “Yes. But I have to finish this. I can’t put it aside like a bad dream. It has to be dealt with.”
“Of course. I understand. If there’s anything I can do to help?”
“There is, actually. I want to go and see Primrose and Eric.”
“Of course, as soon as the doctor releases you.” He stroked her hair back. “For now, I think you should rest. I might suggest Lucy and Frederick go back to the motel. It’s been a huge shock to her too. Alex, what about you? Do you want to go back and rescue Maggie from the clutches of the manager, who by my calculations has taken a shine to your pup?”
Alex smiled at his mother. “You going to be okay if I leave for a bit? I can stay if you want me to.”
She shook her head. “Honey, I’m fine. You go and do what you have to do. I could really do with a long sleep. I feel as though I’ve been awake for years.” Billie contemplated Hamish. “I can’t thank you enough for what you’ve done. For looking out for my boy and for not giving up on me even though you probably thought I was all kinds of crazy.”
Hamish gave her such a dazzling smile she was taken back. “Never. I don’t doubt you or your sanity, Billie. What happened to you is very strange and probably most people won’t believe you, but there is too much that you know you couldn’t possibly have without inside information.” He laughed. “I still have plenty of questions and I believe the police will have more than a few too. I’ll be there for those if you want, but I don’t think you’re crazy. I suspect you’re far saner than most of us.”
“Thanks, I appreciate it.”
Alex snuggled up and planted his face into her shoulder, careful of the tender bruises circling her throat. The smell of her son, the feel of him in her arms only made her feel sadder for what Wilz missed out on. Never knowing the sound of the child you were carrying, the smell of its skin, would gut Billie.
Alex kissed her cheek and climbed from the bed. “I’ll be back soon.”
Hamish leaned down and dropped a kiss onto her hair. “Take it easy and sleep. We’ll come back in a few hours and see what the doctor says.”
“Thanks, Hamish.”
When they left, Billie wondered how she’d find the energy to finish what she’d started.
Billie woke from a deep sleep with the feeling of being watched. She opened her eyes and gazed at the man in the white coat. The doctor who’d admitted her stood by the bed with her chart in his hands. “Ah, Mrs. Stanford. You’re certainly looking a lot better than when I saw you last.” He picked up her wrist and placed his fingers over her pulse, glanced at his watch. “Hmm, much better.”
He dropped the chart on her bed and stared into her eyes. “Feeling more like yourself now?”
“Yes, thank you.”
“Any idea how you came to be splashing around a half dried-up lake at that time of day?”
“No.”
He stood up, crossed his arms and frowned down on her. “Right, well the police still want to have a word with you about that.”
“Fine. I’ll go in and see them with my father before I leave to go home.” She pulled herself up into a sitting position, smoothed out the sheets. “When can I go?”
“I’d like you to stay the night, see you in the morning and we can discuss it then. Okay?” He said the last word without waiting for her answer, pivoted on his heel and left the room.
“Fine.” The word hung in the air with nobody to hear. She rested her head back, thought for a moment and then rang the bell. It took a while before a nurse came to see what she wanted.
“Yes, love. What can I do for you?”
“My clothes. The ones I came in. Where are they?”
“In a bag in the wardrobe. You won’t be wanting to wear them home. Filthy they are, all smeared with rank-smelling mud. You’ll have to get your family to pick something up for you, I think.”
“Sure, but I want to see them.” She slid her legs out of bed and closed her eyes willing the world to stop spinning.
Firm hands pushed her back against the pillows. “You stay right there. Can’t have you falling in a heap on the floor. Sister will have me, she will.” She tucked Billie back in bed before going over to the wardrobe in the corner of the room. Out of it she pulled a brown paper bag labelled ‘patient’s property.’
Billie pounced on it as soon as she put it on the bed. “Thank you.” The nurse tottered away muttering to herself.
The putrid smell rose to greet her. The mud covered clothing she’d been wearing when she was pulled from the lake lay congealed together. It all came back to her, the feel of his fingers pressing on her throat, the chill of the water as he pushed her under, the burn as her lungs screamed for air.
Billie
