Fighting the pull to go back to sleep, Ryder focused on the now. The sheets were twisted around her ankles and she must have pushed her pillow away in the night. No doubt it would be on the floor again as it was most mornings. She forced her eyelids apart and looked up at the ceiling. The dirty white paint had seen better days. Flakes peeled in spots and the curled edges were home to more spider webs than she’d seen in one place before.
“They make them bigger and better in Australia.” Her father’s words came back to her and she looked for the spider the web belonged to, hoping like hell it stayed on the roof out of her way. She rolled over to the side of the bed and sat up, brushing her hair out of her face. In her sleep wear, a white singlet and panties, she padded over to the open window, leaned on the wooden frame, and looked out at the yard of her childhood home.
When she’d broken the news to her mother, she’d insisted Ryder and Eb move into their rental house in Mudgee when she finished her course. At least that way, she would have less to worry about looking for accommodation. The tenants had been advised and given notice that she would be taking over at the end of their lease if she got the posting back home. Things had gone her way and when she arrived in Mudgee with her daughter in tow, Ryder found the tenants had done a runner leaving arrears in the rent and assorted animals which the real estate had done its best to relocate. The small flock of sheep found a new home, but not the poultry or the old horse, nor the heavily pregnant evasive cat that she’d spied in the barn, slinking between bales of hay. Eb had done her best to coax it down with food, but so far the cat was staying out of the way.
The tenants also left the house in a hell of a mess. Rubbish had been thrown out and left in a pile in the front yard, made all the worse because of the storms that had rolled through and dumped the countryside under a deluge of rain. Everything was soggy and smelling by the time Ryder had hit town. With help from the real estate office, she’d hired a handyman and a skip bin and cleared up as much as she could. All that was left to show where it had been was a large patch of dead grass that would eventually grow back.
The inside of the house was another story. It’d had a basic clean before Ryder arrived, but she spent the first couple of days on her hands and knees scrubbing away years of built up dirt and grime before she could bear to eat or sleep at the home she couldn’t remember ever being at. According to her mother, when they decided to make the move to America, they rented the farm out in case they didn’t settle well. At least they’d have a home to come back to if they needed it. And it was turning out to be an adventure for her easy going daughter, Ebony. Being on the farm after a year in the city was perfect for her even if Ryder wasn’t finding things how she’d imagined they would be. The three weeks she’d taken to settle into the house, secure day care for Eb, and find her feet went fast, too fast.
But now the house was liveable and she had some of her own furniture and belongings that had been shipped from overseas, Ryder was happier, more settled. The yard still needed work but it would keep her occupied when she wasn’t on duty and her mind needed that outdoor activity. She hoped after a couple of years away from her previous life, she would be able to move on and live without the guilt and nightmares haunting her every waking moment.
Coffee was the first order of the day before her baby woke up. She poked her head in Eb’s bedroom door and watched her eyelids fluttering in time to her dream. Ryder glanced at her watch. She probably had half an hour before Eb would stir and crawl out of bed. Time for that first coffee. She pattered down to the kitchen, and switched on the heavy duty coffee machine she’d brought new before leaving the States before pouring the beans into the grinder. The noise overshadowed the rooster who insisted everyone on the farm wake up.
Ryder watched him on the roof of the old hen house proudly calling to the sun while the beans ground down. Her old mug sat on the draining board and she placed it under the spout before she filled up the pot with water. The machine gurgled and did its thing. When her mug was full of the strong brew, Ryder took the first sip of the day, closing her eyes as the caffeine hit her tongue, trickled down her throat, and eventually seeped into her bloodstream. The only thing missing were the donuts she would normally grab by the box on her way into work. She had to get used to a completely new way of life here. A bowl of cereal would have to do once she was dressed and ready to go. She got a bowl out for Eb and put the cereal packet with a bottle of milk out for her independent girl to sort out when she woke up.
For now, Ryder needed her newly acquired animal fix. She padded on bare feet back to her bedroom, pulled on a pair of old shorts, then slid her feet
