Noah grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the path. “My aunt Bella makes the best cakes. If you’re good, Mom might let you have an extra slice. She gets a bit tough like that in case you spoil your dinner.”
As they disappeared into the house, Pearl moved closer. “If you want to go and see Ethan, we’ll take care of Noah for you.”
“I don’t know, Pearl. I wonder if our time has gone. Maybe we weren’t meant to be together.”
“That’s rubbish and you know it. I can tell by the shadows under your eyes you don’t believe a word you’re saying.” She rubbed her hand up Mari’s arm. “I know you, child. Always looking out for other people before yourself. You were always the sensitive one, caring for everybody else.”
“There’s always one child in the family that does it. Rake taught me that even though he was wrong about what he knew. I wish he’d known the truth, Pearl.”
“So do I, honey. So do I. And he was right too. But the time has come for you to think about what you want out of life.”
Despair weighed heavy on her chest. “I think I’ve ruined things. Only thought about myself. Ethan may never forgive me and I don’t blame him one bit.”
Pearl patted her hand. “If I’ve learned one thing in life, it’s that everything can be fixed. Some things are harder than others, but that doesn’t mean you should give up. Life wasn’t meant to be easy.”
“Don’t I know it.” Laughter came from the open kitchen door and she smiled, listening to her son. “At least I’ve managed to make someone happy. Guess that’s a plus.”
“Ethan’s down at the packing shed. He’s doing repairs on the office for me.” A hopeful gleam twinkled in her eyes.
“I don’t know, Pearl.” She didn’t know if she had the right words to make everything better.
“What’s holding you back, honey?”
“Regret. The thought of impending doom. Rejection, take your pick.” She wasn’t being very positive.
It was crazy considering she’d had years to get her emotions in check. Ever since Rake had extracted the promise to return from her, she’d talked herself up, convinced herself this was what she wanted. Now that hard words were being spoken, she had cold feet.
“I don’t know if Rake did the right thing making you come back here. We can talk about that at another stage but I’m not going to look a gift horse in the mouth.” She reached down and snapped a daisy off, holding the flower in her palm, contemplating it. “But I do think it was his way of saying sorry too.”
“What do you mean?” This wasn’t what she was expecting at all.
“Rake might’ve been a hothead and all but deep down that boy knew right from wrong. He’d have known how much Ethan loved you. Initially it might’ve seemed like he was thumbing his nose at us but he wouldn’t do that to his brother, not intentionally. I think he sent you back here to make amends. To give you another chance at happiness.”
*
Her shadow filled the door, startling him as he brought the hammer down. Pain shot through his hand as the cold steel smashed against his thumb. Ethan cursed, dropped his hammer.
Mari ran toward him, reaching out to help him. “Let me see that.”
“No, it’s fine. Wasn’t concentrating.” He wiped the spot of blood on his jeans. “I’ve had worse.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Not your fault.” He shrugged and turned away to pick up his hammer.
“Not that. I mean I am but that wasn’t what I was talking about. I’m sorry for leaving, for never getting in touch with you. I should’ve at least sent you a note to say I was okay instead of ignoring you. That was mean after all we meant to each other.”
He closed his eyes as the old pain surfaced. She had no idea how much that’d hurt him. His heart felt like it’d been ripped from his chest. The only one who’d understood had been Christian.
“It was. But I’m glad you were okay.”
“You really don’t understand why I stayed with your brother, do you?”
She’d hit it right on the head. As much as he’d loved his big brother, the betrayal had hit hard. “No, I don’t.”
Mari clasped her hands in front of her. “We were both lost in our own way.” She smiled at him, the sadness clouding her eyes. “Oh, I know I had a fairly good life here. I had you, we both did okay really. But it wasn’t enough, not back then.”
“I tried to protect you from everything.” Not being enough still dug at him.
“I know you did and it’s not your fault. My mother has a lot to answer for, we know that. But the big thing was, even with you at my side I was drifting, not sure where I belonged. Rake and I, well, we were so much alike. When he heard your parents fighting, he was only fifteen. He was vulnerable, Ethan. Imagine if that’d been you. How would you have felt?”
“He should’ve said something. Anything.” He threw his hands in the air and stepped away from her. “Instead he let it churn over in his gut, eventually turning him against us. We didn’t deserve that, Mari. None of us did.”
“You were twelve years old then. Not much older than Noah is now. Would you put that on his shoulders?” Her voice cracked. “Would you?”
Dull the shine in that little boy’s eyes? Not a hope in hell. “No.”
“So, he did what he did well. He held it in and waited for the right moment.”
“You.”
“No. I told you before he didn’t know I was going to
