“Oh, no—” Laura began, but he held up a hand to silence her.
“Now listen to me, damn it! I’m beginning to wonder if you were running away from your father or from Beth.”
“Jack!” Laura stood up and faced him, her temper rising.
“Marcie and Beebo look about as much alike as Laurel and Hardy. Yet they both remind you of Beth.”
“But that doesn’t mean—”
“And you fell for both of them. And don’t tell me they were the only ones.” His eyes were hard to meet. Laura looked down.
She shook her head. “No,” she whispered, confused, rubbing her eyes. “No.”
“Beth must have been a great girl, Mother. But you can’t stay in love with her all of your life. Even if she was the first one.” Laura’s face flushed.
“I won’t talk about this, Jack!” she exclaimed.
“You don’t have to. I will.”
“It’s my private life.”
“You’ve pulled me into it. What’s the matter, are you afraid to hear me talk about it?”
She sat down, angry. “No,” she said sharply. “I’m not afraid.”
Jack took a sip of his café royale. “Okay,” he said in a businesslike voice. “I’m going to tell you something you won’t like. But I think you ought to know it. You were never in love with Marcie, Laura.”
They looked at each other and finally Laura exploded, “You’re cracked! I thought you understood. I thought—you, of all people—understood how I felt about her!”
“I did.”
“I don’t want to hear any more!”
“I don’t doubt it,” he said. She rose again and faced him, defiant and hurt. “You loved Beth,” he said, more gently. “You loved love. It showed in all you said to me, when we first met. You needed love and you went looking for it. You went looking for another Beth. You were bound to find her. You found her in every female face that appealed to you.
“Laura,” Jack said slowly. “Marcie doesn’t look like Beth. Neither does Beebo. Nobody looks like Beth but Beth. And Beth is gone. She isn’t yours anymore. She belongs to a man.”
Laura covered her face suddenly with a groan. “Jack, don’t! Please,” she whimpered. Then, gathering her anger around her, she said, “They do look like her! I swear they do!”
Jack shook his head. “They just looked like love, Mother.”
Laura gave a little sob. “Jack, don’t torture me.”
“You know why I’m doing it. You know I don’t want to hurt you. Now listen to me, Laura. You can’t stay in love with Beth all your life.”
Laura put her hands down and looked at him again. “Jack, you don’t know how wonderful she was. You never knew her, you can’t talk about her. She was so beautiful, she was so good to me. She made me understand what I was, when I was so ignorant and scared that you wouldn’t believe it! And she made me understand without hurting me. She made it beautiful. I owe her so much. I loved her so.”
“But she’s married, Laura. You told me that yourself. You’ll never even see her again. No matter how good she was.”
“She never hurt me!” Laura flared. “Marcie hurt me, Beebo hurt me, but never Beth.”
“Oh, balls!” Jack said. “Never hurt you, hell! She left you, didn’t she! She slept with a guy and married him. What do you want, Mother, a silk-lined accident-proof guaranteed romance? Good for six months with lotsa kicks and no pain? Or your money back? They don’t come that way. Ask anybody. Ask me. Ask Terry.” And then his face softened. “She’s gone, Laura,” he said quietly, significantly. “And you can’t go back to Marcie.”
Laura sat down and let the tears roll down her face, and her mouth trembled. “And I can’t go back to Beebo,” she whispered.
Jack walked over to her and leaned on the table, one arm on either side of her. He put his head against hers and said into her ear, almost in a whisper, “Beebo loves you, honey. She’s no Beth. No Marcie. She’s herself, and for all you know, that may be even better.”
Laura covered her face then and cried.
Fifteen minutes later Jack, who had gone into the bedroom to dress, came back to the kitchen and said, “I’m going to the office for the rest of the day. Somebody has to pay the rent.” He looked at Terry with a wry smile.
Laura looked up quickly. “I’ve got to talk to her, Jack. Where can I find her?”
“Beebo? She’s working. Stick around till I get home, Mother. Sleep. You look like hell. Get Terry to read you a story or something. You can see her tonight.”
“Thanks.” She looked at him with wet eyes and then she smiled. “Thanks, Jack. For everything.”
He grinned. “It’s those damn oysters,” he said. “I’m a new man.” He winked at Terry and left.
Chapter Seventeen
The Cellar was not very crowded when Laura walked in at eight o’clock. By a quarter to nine, when Beebo got there, the place had filled up a little and the jukebox was going. Dutton, the sketch artist, was making a few bucks with the tourists. There was a tableful of them in one corner that he was working on. Beebo sat down at the bar and began to josh the bartender. She didn’t see Laura, and Laura’s heart was pounding so high in her chest that she was afraid to go near Beebo. She didn’t know what to say. She was sickeningly afraid of a rebuff, and she hung back in a sweat. She deserved a rebuttal, but she was afraid she couldn’t take it.
She watched Beebo for a while, her face shaded slightly as she leaned away from the bar lights. She let the heads of the people next to
