How had it come to this?
At least the weather was nice today.
Hey, who invited Polly Positive to the party?
Like a storm in the desert …
Enough with the John Denver songs!
Where in the hell was Kate?
As if on cue, Kate’s Volvo raced up to the sidewalk, scaring a couple of teens who were texting while crossing in front of the store.
Kate’s window rolled down. “Hurry up, Natalie! He’s leaving the lot.”
Ah, hell. They were really going to do this.
“Balls!” Natalie shouted and shook her fist at the blue sky, and then she raced around the front of the car.
Kate didn’t even give her time to shut her door before stomping on the gas pedal. She took a right out of the lot and gunned it, rolling through a stop sign.
“You’re going to get a ticket if you’re not careful,” Natalie said, gripping the dashboard.
“You sound like an old woman.”
Natalie glared at Kate. The wind rushing in through the driver’s side window was blowing her cousin’s hair every which way. Oh, how the sane and rational do fall. “Listen, Crazy Kate, I don’t want to die before I get to have sex with Coop. I’ve been waiting a long time for that man.”
“You should have followed him to his camper last night then.” Kate shot her a glare. “And don’t call me crazy!”
Natalie held up her hands. “Whoa! Okay, sorry, but your left eye is twitching faster than a rabbit’s nose after snorting cocaine, and you’re chasing down a guy who you think is a serial killer with what to capture him? Your enchanting wit?”
Enough was enough. Natalie pulled her cell phone from her pocket.
“What are you doing with that?” Kate rolled through another stop sign.
“I’m going to call Claire and tell her to come get us, because at this rate we’re going to end up in Grady’s jail cell again.”
Kate snatched Natalie’s phone away from her.
“Hey! Give that back to me.”
Kate threw the phone out her open window while blowing through a third stop sign.
“What the hell!” Natalie turned in her seat, frowning out the back window at the sight of her cellphone lying in the middle of the road. Before she could sputter out another word, a huge pickup with a jacked-up suspension and meaty tires rolled over it.
She whirled on her cousin. “What is wrong with you?!”
“Me? What’s wrong with you? Have you lost your nerve? We have the killer right in front of us and you’re going to call and tattle to Claire.”
“I … you … this is so screwed up.” She looked backward again. The stupid monster-truck-wannabe was riding on Kate’s ass. “That phone wasn’t cheap.”
“Phones are replaceable. My sisters aren’t. We’re going to stop this bastard before he hurts anyone else.” Kate glanced in the rearview mirror, doing a double take. “Damn it to Betsy!”
“What now?” Natalie faced fully forward, keeping her eyes on the SUV Kate was tailing.
The killer ran the upcoming stop sign and gunned it, putting distance between them. He must have figured out he was being tailed.
“Deputy Dipshit,” Kate said.
“What about him?”
“He’s driving that asinine, cave troll–sized penis-inflator behind me.”
“Good. Let him go catch the diamond killer.”
“Ernie is as useless as a screen door on a submarine.”
“And what are we? You can’t ram that guy with your car, Kate.”
“Why not?”
“Because you’re pregnant!”
“Shoot, that’s right.”
The pickup sped up and pulled alongside the left of them. The horn blared. “Stop the car, Morgan!” the deputy yelled out his passenger window. Although he was too high up for Natalie to see him.
Kate flipped him off in reply and hit the gas, racing ahead.
“Christ!” Natalie grabbed the oh-shit handle above her door as Kate raced through another stop sign without even slowing down. “We’re going to die today,” she said. “My parents are going to be so mad at you for killing me, Kate.”
“Relax. We’re not going to die.” She glared in the rearview mirror. “Though I may seriously maim Deputy Dipshit for screwing up our posse chase.”
The SUV in front of them locked up the brakes and took a hard left. The vehicle skidded around the turn.
“Damn it!” Kate said. “He’s definitely on to us.”
“You think? Or maybe he’s trying to get out of the way of the two crazy drivers flying up behind him!”
“I’M NOT CRAZY!” Kate screeched while swerving to the left to cut off Deputy Dipshit as he tried to ride up beside them again.
The big truck came up on their right side instead. “You’re under arrest, Kate Morgan!” he yelled out his window.
Kate rolled down Natalie’s window. “You’re not on duty, Ernie! So shove your stupid arrest up your dumb ass! We’re chasing a killer, damn it!”
“Pull over now!” The deputy’s face was beet red as he glared down at them from his perch up high. Natalie wouldn’t have been surprised to see steam puffing out his ears at that moment.
Kate rolled up Natalie’s window and punched the traction control system button. “Hold on,” she said as she flew past the road the SUV had turned down. “I saw James Garner do this on The Rockford Files.”
Natalie gawked at Kate. She searched for her tongue and found it hiding behind her tonsils. “What are you going to do?”
“Lose this asshole.” Kate hit the brakes hard, coming to a complete stop in the middle of the road.
Deputy Dipshit swerved, laying on his horn, and shot past them.
Kate shifted into reverse, watching over her shoulder, and gunned it for a couple of seconds.
“Please tell me you’re not going to try a Rockford,” Natalie said.
“Not try.” Kate lifted her foot off the gas, whipping the steering wheel counterclockwise. “Do!”
“Fuck!” Natalie yelled, holding on for dear life as the
