Freya jerked in the water when Wolf´s face replaced Philip´s. Had the Frost Bringer really made such an impression on her that he was now intruding on her most cherished memories? She pushed her feet to the bottom of the river, feeling little fish nibbling.
“What´s wrong?” Armmie shouted, clearly seeing the distress on Freya´s face.
“Nothing,” Freya murmured.
“She was probably thinking about her beloved soldier Philip again,” Dasha said with a yawn. “Pathetic if you ask me and it is beyond my understanding how you still can yearn for that mortal.”
“Nobody asked you and I was a mortal too once and he was my soulmate,” Freya said angrily. “And Philip and I will meet again one day.”
“Mhm,” Dasha said, sounding so bored that Freya wanted to slap her. “Sure you will.”
“You know nothing about such feelings, you´ve never been in love.” Freya let out a low laughter.
Dasha had become a god when she in 1923 took her own life, to avoid a hanging after she killed her fiancé who she realized had been deceiving her about his wealth. The poor man had been head over heels with Dasha, lied about his fortune and when she found out, she poisoned his supper.
Dasha´s beautiful eyes darkened.
“How dare you talk to me about that?” Bringing up the way one had turned into a god was always a sensitive subject. “Stop laughing Freya or I will make you pay.”
“What will you do?” Freya asked with raised eyebrows. “Drown me or will you maybe poison my food?” She pretended to remember something. “Oops that´s right, you can´t drown me and I don´t eat…so.”
Dasha´s mouth curved.
“You´re right I can´t but I could always tell Swarog that you´re here. I could tell him to pay you a visit, when you´re asleep and vulnerable. I´m sure he´s missed you and I´m sure he can´t wait to mark your flesh once more.”
Rage bubbled up in Freya, making her see red. Ever since she had been made an immortal she´d had nightmares about Swarog every night that left her shaken. If Swarog ever found her…
“You foul river bitch,” Freya shouted, going after Dasha with claws and teeth as she furiously screamed. “If you do it, I´ll kill you.”
Dasha laughed but her laughter went silent when Freya pushed her under the surface. It was true that one couldn´t drown a god but that didn´t mean you couldn´t hurt them. Dasha´s face twisted in anger and slight fear, when Freya pushed her further down to the bottom.
She flailed with her slim arms and Freya thought about all the humans she had drowned which made her even angrier…and stronger. Once down at the bottom, she pressed Dasha into the sand, placing a large rock over her head and continued to do the same until her whole body was covered.
When Freya reached the surface her heart was racing and she was panting heavily and yet she was pleased. It had felt good to put Dasha in her place and it was something she had wanted to do in a long…long time.
“That wasn´t nice,” Armmie said leisurely. She had joined Cass at the shore, even though god´s were unable to tan darker than a cup of milk with a drop of coffee.
“I don´t care. She wasn´t nice to me.”
“Always so angry and always so hostile,” Cass said. “When will you ever become one of us? Truly?”
I won´t, Freya thought. It was her worst fear, because even if she had been a god for centuries, she still felt like she had kept a large part of her humanity. And the longer she spent time with her fellow god´s the more she feared she would turn twisted like them. What was it that her mother used to tell her, when she´d still been alive? You become as good as the company you keep.
“I am one of you, whether I like it or not,” Freya said and Cass and Armmie smiled at each other. Secretive, condescending smiles that always made Freya feel even more like an outsider.
“It is not so bad,” Cass said. “We can´t really die, we are never hungry and we spend our days playing in rivers. You shouldn’t complain.”
“Speak for yourself,” Freya said. “I´m not surprised you enjoy this, considering the other alternative.” Cass stiffened and Freya smiled to herself. Cass had in 1746 thrown a fit in a fight with one of her brothers and managed to set fire to the curtains with a candle. Their whole mansion had burned down, taking half of Cass´s family with it. Unable to live with the shame, Cass had gone to the river and drowned herself.
“Why so confrontational this evening?” Cass said bitterly. “Is something in particular bothering you?”
“No.” Yes. Where in the raving river was Wolf? He´d said he would be back. But then Freya told herself, it was better if he stayed away. “Except for you all, but then again you´re always bothering me.”
Cass and Armmie shrugged, returning to gossiping with each other. Freya felt restless and her bones seemed to be aching. And she missed her friend Ondina the Alchemist of Waterways and she figured she should go visit her, since they hadn´t talked to each other in a while.
“Where are you going?” Armmie called after her.
“None of your business.”
“You´re not going to that twat Ondina, are you?”
“What?” Cass shrieked. “You´d rather be with that stupid nymph than with us? How dare you embarrass us like that? Come back here at once!” If Cass had been a human her face would have turned red with anger but now her cheeks just blushed like pale roses. Sometimes Freya suspected that god´s were so dramatic just because it flattered their looks.
“I dare easily and I´ll come back later tonight.”
“No you won´t, you stay right here,” Armmie said and pointed up at the sky. She was right. It was dusk and soon they would come. Freya didn´t really feel like it and neither did she perk up at the
