I grinned widely and showed Nance. A huge smirk crossed her face.
“So you’re not gonna tell him I want him? I’m so fucking jealous right now.” I giggled and shrugged.
“Maybe he liked my singing voice. Alfie wants me to gig there again at some point.” Soph chuckled as she placed her feet on my lap.
“We will have to go there again so you can see him again. Maybe then you can get under him and Nance can get on Conway?” I slapped her feet and heard her cackle. Hearing the door creak I looked to see my mother in the living room doorway. She looked completely exhausted and my heart began to swell.
“Hey girls,” her voice was small. So small and it killed me. Her large hazel eyes looked completely drained. I hated what her job did to her. I felt my frown re-appear. “I’m just going to see what we have to eat then can I join you?” She questioned and I nodded towards her.
“Of course Lana. Av made cottage pie I think there’s still some left.” Soph smiled towards her. It was a warm smile, not one many of us got very often.
“Great I’ll go and warm it through and I’ll be back, is the Vixen on?” I shook my head in disbelief. She had no time for anything however she still found the time to watch this shit on television. A small laugh escaped my lips and I shook my head.
Holt - Tuesday
There was no way I was going anywhere today. I was too tired. I had no lectures and I needed just five minutes to myself. There was no buzz in the house, my mother wasn’t throwing pans in the kitchen, there was no smell of a cooked breakfast, there was just a sense of peace. Over the last few years I had noticed the strain of working a full time job on my mother. She was beginning to look completely worn down. My heart thudded against my chest and I placed my hand against it. I looked around my familiar surroundings in my bedroom. My old white wash wardrobe that I had brought from Ikea was partially blocking out the light from my bedroom window. My mother had warned me that it would be far too large for my tiny room, but as I normally do I ignored her. I let my fingers swipe my phone to unlock it and I stared at my back screen image. It was of our old dog Bently. I smiled at the memory of the day that photo was taken. It seemed like a lifetime ago, when things were much more straightforward. I remembered that photo being taken. Mum had just shouted at him for chewing up a pair of her shoes. I chuckled to myself and rose from my extremely comfortable bed and wandered across the landing towards my bathroom.
‘Fancy taking me for a coffee?’
I hit send. I had no idea what had possessed me to send him that message. I tiptoed to reach the shower and screamed as the cold water splashed off the floor. Soon enough the water had warmed through and I stepped in. The warm sensation ran through me and I instantly felt relaxed. A quick shower fixed everything and once I’d climbed out I examined my body again. My hips were wider than Soph’s and Nancy’s. They swore to me that my stomach was just as flat but I didn’t agree. I frowned deeply at the girl stood looking back at me. I would never be as petite as them. I reached across to my bra staring at the sizing in the back 32D. I frowned again. This was an attribute I acquired from my mother, only hers were a lot bigger than mine. I heard my phone buzz and I jumped slightly. My heart began to race.
‘There’s a dance class on tomorrow evening? I know street isn’t your thing but please come with me? Please please please!? Xxxxx’
A wave of disappointment hit me like a brick as the realisation it was Nance and not Conway hit. I typed back.
‘Sure I’ll be there, you owe me one x’
I could picture her smiling from ear to ear. My phone buzzed again.
‘I can meet you in an hour? Starbucks is better though meet me there if you’re still up for it?’
The small teenage girl in me jumped for joy. Maybe I wasn’t that fat. Maybe I was attractive. Yeah Ben, kiss my ass. I chuckled at my thoughts and began to pull my skinny jeans up my legs.
I had walked to the Starbucks on Range Avenue quicker than I ever had before. It was cooler today, I looked down at my long camel coloured coat and exhaled. I was nervous. So fucking nervous. Dating had never been my strong point. This was probably why I was still a virgin. Virgin on the ridiculous, you’ll be a 40 year old virgin. I remembered Soph had said this to me once. I pushed the memory aside and took my seat. I glanced at the time, it was 11.30. I was late only by 5 minutes. I had done this on purpose, not one part of me wanted to show I was eager to see him again. The air of mystery around him intrigued me. I wanted to know why he was so up for meeting again for coffee. I felt as though time was going by with a snail's pace. There was a large exhale and as I looked up I saw him smiling down at me.
“Sorry I was late, I had a phone call to make.” I could see the strained look on his face and he looked older today. Shit maybe Soph was right maybe he is like 30.
“How old are you?” I questioned. I watched his face twist and noticed the corners of his mouth turned upwards.
“Wow right in there going in for the jugular.” He held his
