Jesse wanted to curl up somewhere, and pull the covers over his head. “Not right now.”
“Okay. We’ll go home.”
Dom touched the small of his back, waiting until Jesse was ready to leave. Jesse focused on that light pressure. He breathed in that blackwood scent, and walked with Dom out of the medical center. It was easier when he didn’t have to think about all the other people staring at him. Just Dom. Dom was safe.
In the parking lot, he drew his first deep breath. Then another. It felt so good to fill his lungs again.
“You don’t like hospitals, huh?” Dom asked.
Jesse shook his head. Then he thought Dom might judge him, but Dom only pulled open the passenger door, waiting for Jesse to climb in.
“I’m not a baby,” Jesse said.
“Yeah, I know.” Dom cracked a smile, squeezing his thigh. “But you’re allowed to be scared.”
He left the door open, so Jesse could close it when he was ready. Then Dom climbed into the driver’s seat, glanced at Jesse, and said, “I’m closing the door.”
Jesse made sure he looked at the door, so he knew it was that door closing, and not some door from his memory. “Okay.”
Dom smiled, squeezing his knee.
“Want some food?” Dom asked. “It’ll be an hour of nothing ‘til we get back to Meadowfall.”
Jesse wanted a donut, but his stomach was still churning. So he shook his head.
They drove home in silence, Dom tapping his fingers on the steering wheel. Jesse realized he’d never really seen Dom in private before—it had always been Dom the deputy, Dom at bar night, or Dom all over him. Never just Dom alone, watching the road, just... existing. He looked like he was at peace with himself.
“What’s it like not being scared?” Jesse blurted. Then he thought maybe he shouldn’t have asked.
Dom cracked a smile. “That’s a hard one.”
“Maybe.”
“Only because I don’t have much left to lose.”
Jesse blinked. “You have a house. And a job.”
Dom shrugged. “Yeah.” He paused. “I lost my omega.”
Jesse’s breath left his lungs. He’d never lost anyone close to him before. But back at the Facility, he’d glimpsed some of his fellow subjects in cages. Some he’d almost felt a comradeship with. Then they’d disappeared, and he’d asked about them. Rutherford said they’d died.
So Jesse knew that feeling of loss. He just hadn’t experienced it with someone who was as important to him as a bondmate. And now he felt bad for Dom.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
Then he thought about the medical center, about the things inside him, and wondered if Dom had somehow known. And if Dom was going to see him as a replacement omega. He shoved that thought away.
Dom sighed. “It’s complicated.”
“That’s okay.” Jesse looked at the roof of the truck. “My life is complicated.”
Dom’s smile faded. Jesse missed it immediately, but he didn’t know how to bring it back.
They didn’t speak again until they turned off the highway into Meadowfall. “Where do you live?” Dom asked. After a pause, he added. “Or would you rather crash at my place? The offer’s still open.”
Jesse fidgeted with his scarred fingers. Dom was still being inexplicably nice. “I don’t know. Is it quiet there?”
His apartment wasn’t so quiet sometimes. He’d been thinking about renting a different place, somewhere with neighbors who didn’t slam their doors. But Jesse had moved about four times, and he was getting tired of uprooting himself again.
“Yeah. It’s quiet there.” Dom tapped on the steering wheel. “There’s food in the fridge, and I have a spare bed.”
“Oh.” Jesse had thought that maybe Dom would invite him into his bed. Was this a good thing?
As though he’d read Jesse’s mind, Dom added dryly, “You could share my bed. But no sex.”
And now Jesse was disappointed. What, did he think Dom was ready to drag him into bed?
“At least, not until we’ve gotten this thing sorted out,” Dom muttered.
Jesse cheered up at that. Even though he’d sworn up and down that he wasn’t letting Dom fuck him again.
At the house, he waited for Dom to let him in. “Spare room is here,” Dom said, leading the way. Jesse glanced at Dom’s broad shoulders crowding out the space in the hallway, and the pants that clung to his ass. “Here, I’ll get you something to wear.”
He disappeared into another room, one that smelled completely like blackwood. Jesse stepped closer, just sniffing at that scent. Did Dom know he smelled good? Or was Jesse just so tired that his thoughts were getting weird?
Dom stepped out, thrusting some folded clothes at him. “And a toothbrush. There. You’re set.”
“Thanks,” Jesse mumbled.
Dom was staring too intently at him. Jesse felt that maybe he should snark at Dom, just so he seemed more in control. He was so exhausted, though. Maybe tomorrow.
“I’ll see you later,” Jesse said.
Dom watched as he headed into the bedroom.
When he’d shut the door, the fatigue crept back, turning his limbs into lead.
He shook out the clothes Dom had handed him. They smelled like soap and blackwood, and he buried his face in them, filling his lungs with Dom’s scent.
Maybe, when he left... maybe he needed to borrow one of Dom’s used shirts. Just because.
Slowly, he shrugged out of his clothes, before pulling on Dom’s PJs. They were worn and soft, and the shirt was a little tight on him. The shorts, too. Then Jesse thought about Dom wearing this to bed, with nothing else beneath, and his body thrummed.
It was a good thought. He climbed into bed, pulled the covers over his head, and closed his eyes.
When he opened his eyes, the shadows were all wrong. Jesse panicked a little, trying to figure where he was. Then he smelled blackwood on the sheets, and calmed. Dom was around somewhere. That was good.
Immediately after, he hated himself for thinking that. He didn’t need to depend on Dom. He was alpha. He didn’t need another alpha to feel safe.
Jesse threw off the sheets, swinging
