“You ready, baby?”
Carl backs away and grabs my bags sitting by the closet door as I swing my legs over the edge of the bed. “As ready as I can be.”
He nods, then opens his arms. I walk toward him and press myself into his side. As we walk out, I take my time looking at everything as we pass. I was so amazed by all of the beauty here the first time I came. I never imagined how much I would fall in love with this place and the people in it, but I did. And now that I’m leaving, I feel a sense of nostalgia.
I was brought here against my will and hated it, but that slowly changed, and after Teddy’s death, I fought like hell to come back. It’s been less than a day and I’m just packing up and leaving. I almost want to laugh at how bizarre it all seems, but I did what I had to do. I said goodbye and let go. Now it’s time to start a new chapter.
No matter what, this will always be home though.
Five months later…
The water crashes against the shore, creating a rhythmic tune. With the sun beating down on me and the smell of salt in the air, I can’t help but smile. This is the most peaceful my life has seemed in the past year. I guess I’m finally coming to terms with things. When I think about all that has happened, I don’t cry anymore. Sure, my heart still aches knowing that in a matter of weeks I’ll be birthing a child whose father is dead, and I don’t have my dad to help me either, but it gets better every day.
And Lucas finally took me to the beach. I was worried about leaving Julius and Carl—all of Northridge Heights really—but we compromised and came to a small California town. I got the beach I’ve always wanted to see, and Lucas is still close to his brother. I don’t think either of us really wanted to leave, but we knew it’d be best. Trying to raise a baby in the environment we were in just wasn’t practical. I wanted the baby to have a normal life. A life that didn’t consist of gun training and self-defense before she could even walk.
I want her to grow up happy and carefree, the same way my dad made it seem for me. I don’t want her to have to worry about me or someone else she loves being murdered, then left to figure out why.
I lean my head back and rest it on the swing as we sway. We have a little house off the beach. It has two bedrooms, an open living room encased in glass for the perfect view, and a porch that wraps around the front with a porch swing. My favorite part.
“What’s the matter, baby?” Lucas asks, dragging me from my thoughts.
“Nothing. I was just thinking.” I give him a weak smile.
“About him?” His eyes are soft.
I feel he’s come to terms with things too in a sense. He agrees that the baby should know about her dad and how powerful he was, and he knows I still love Teddy. I’m sure it hurts him in a way, but it’s not something I can change. Teddy was my first for a lot of things. He gave me confidence, made me believe in myself, and showed me what love was and wasn’t. Because of that, he will always hold a special place in my heart.
I nod honestly, then try and change the subject. I don’t feel the need to voice my thoughts all the time. It’s just nice to have someone who understand when I do. “I finally picked a name.”
His eyebrows raise as he strokes my swollen belly. “Oh yeah? You finally caved with knowing what she was, and now you’re caving on the name. I thought you weren’t going to decide until delivery.”
I roll my eyes. “The name is too perfect. It’s already stuck in my head.”
He drops his smile, doing his best to be serious. “Lay it on me.”
“Blake Lucia Hale.”
“Kind of has a ring to it.” He smiles.
I nod and place my hand over his. “Yeah. I wasn’t going to give her a middle name. Just keep it Blake Hale for my dad and Teddy. But you’ll be here helping me with her. Loving her, telling her about her dad and badass uncle. I felt it was only right she have a little piece of you too.”
His smile grows. “I can’t wait to tell Julius. He’s going to be so fucking jealous.”
I laugh. Not much has changed in the past five months between them. They still talk their shit and have disagreements, but I feel the distance has helped in a way. They each have their own space and live by their own rules. No one is controlling them anymore or telling them what to do.
Once we settled in, we adapted a new routine with my bed rest. I’m allowed to be up and about for two hours every day, so I use that time to shower, stretch, and anything else I may want to do. But once a month, we make a trip to Northridge Heights to see Carl, Julius, and Teddy. It’s nice to be able to go see them and make sure all is well, but it’s even nicer to leave and not have to worry about the dealings going on there.
With Sebastian running the gun and drug supply now, things seem to be smoother. Maybe it’s just because we don’t have that burden anymore. He’s kept his word thus far and is doing shit pretty clean. After Emil’s guy came for us, we had suspicions it was Sebastian who sent him, but he’s never admitted to it. Normally, we’d keep pushing, but
