As he referred to our first meeting in a coffee house, I suddenly got out of my reverie, apprehending what day and time he was talking about, as I didn't remember seeing him before our meeting at his office.
"I was so tempted to take your soaked body in my arms, to kiss your glossy lips, to touch you, to hold you." He said as he sniffed my hair, while his lips lightly brushed against my collar bone.
I listened silently. I had no strength to say anything; I was too lost in his embrace.
Slowly he moved up to face me now. His icy blue eyes reflected heart-wrenching passion. He put a loose strand of my hair behind my ear, leaning his forehead against mine, before he said, "But I controlled myself. I did not want to risk putting you in danger."
He was confusing me, every hair on my flesh stood up as fright dominated me, guessing what he might say next. I just shut my eyes, waiting to get over with it. He was going to push me away; this thought alone gave me a stabbing pain in the chest.
"Yet when I saw you again in that conference room, I knew it in my guts that I won't be able to keep away from you anymore. I tried. I failed."1
I let out a long sigh of relief.
"I can never push you away, Emma. You are like a drug to me; I am addicted to your existence, and in all honesty, I won't be able to survive a second, knowing you are not a part of my life anymore."
I was relieved listening to his words, I held him tightly, "Then don't. And also, don't ever regret be with me. We will get through this, together. I promise."
This time, I took the initiative, and kissed his lips hungrily, as if my life depended on it. I wanted to conquer his heart, kiss away all his worries and assure him that we can work it out.
This kiss had so many different meanings, layers of soulful and stirring emotions. It meant so much more, to me at least.
It was, a promise that I would never give up on us,
a determination that I would beat all the odds to stay in his life, and a realization that I was madly, irreversibly and unconditionally in love with him.
It was the longest we had kissed thus far, our lips parted, gasping for air. I was absorbing every second of this moment. This was the first time I truly realised how I felt about him. He was caressing my cheeks with the back of his hand; I don't know if it was my heart that made me imagine things, but right now, in his deep blue eyes, I saw love; naive, honest and pure love.
We hugged and stayed like that for some time. Both of us were quiet, just drawing peace and comfort from each other. Our hearts did the talking; they were beating in sync, entrusting each other to never let go.
After some time, Jake broke the silence, "I will be going out of town for a couple of days. I have full-day meetings today, and I am flying to meet my mom tomorrow."
"Okay. I remember you told me your mom shifted to LA briefly after your father died."
"Yes, it was so hard for her. She couldn't keep up with his memories here. So, she decided to move to our house in LA for some time."
"When will you be back?"
"Not before Sunday evening, after visiting mom, I have to go to Norway for some important business."
"Oh, okay. That means I don't get to see you until Monday. That's like six long days." I pouted.
Back of my head, I was very anxious knowing he would be away for so long, but I didn't want to show him that.
"I will try to be back as soon as possible. Meanwhile, Brett would be here. He will always be here looking out for you. He will be guarding you to ensure your safety from a distance."
"Hey! We talked about this already. I don't need a babysitter." I protested.
"It's not negotiable Emma. We have to work through this. Your safety is everything to me. Never forget that." Jake cut me out in a solemn tone.
I dared not argue further. He does get a little intimidating at times, especially when it comes to protecting me.
"Ok. You only got a couple of hours left, come get some sleep. You have a long day ahead." I put his arm under my head and turned to hug him as my head rest on his chest.
Within minutes, we both drifted to sleep.
****
It's been two days since Jake left town, and I have been keeping myself occupied with office work. We chatted a couple of times in the past two days, but majorly he was busy.
I missed him so much.
Brett had been around. I found him outside my apartment when I left for work, and he was always escorting me through commute or wherever I went. He even guarded me on my office floor, not letting me be out of his sight even for a minute.
To be honest, I felt pressured to have someone follow me like a shadow. It was suffocating, but, right now, I could not risk to bring it up with Jake. He was so stressed already; I did not wish to add to his worries.
This is a passing phase, Emma, it will all get better. I consoled myself to handle it patiently.
I was engulfed
