“She’s perfect for you, you know. I don’t know why you’re letting her slip away,” Mona muses in a half-sleepy voice.
“You got all that from one night?” I reply, trying to sound more amused than I feel.
“Mmm,” she says, nodding as she digs into her small purse to find her key. She pauses to give me a thoughtful look. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so hesitant to go after what you wanted before. Even when you were younger, and we played games, you were fiercely competitive. You hated to lose,” she laughs as she pulls out the key she finally finds.
I feel my amusement disappear in a flash. Mona never holds back on being truthful, and wine has a way of intensifying that honesty, coating it with slightly less sugar than usual. She should also know that, along with hating to lose, I don’t like being reminded of my weaknesses.
“I’m glad you had a good time, Mona,” I say as she opens the door.
She stops and turns to me with a sympathetic smile. “Oh, Magnus, I didn’t mean to interfere. You know how I get when I’ve had too much wine.”
“You haven’t interfered with anything.”
She stares at me for an uncomfortably long moment before reaching up on her toes to kiss me on the cheek. “Goodnight, Magnus.”
“Goodnight, Mona.”
I stare at the door after she closes it, willing my body to go back to room-temperature from the heated state she’s put it in. Hell, if I’m going back to the car where Sloane waits while my emotions still take center stage.
By the time I make it to the back seat, I feel myself again. This time, the silence is welcome. It gives me time to think rationally.
In retrospect, Sloane’s reluctance to engage after the gala makes sense. We both still have agendas to fulfill. She can’t open her heart up while I still hold the key to her safety, so she still has every reason not to completely trust me.
And I can’t let her get in the way of completing the mission that I promised myself back at my mother’s funeral.
At La Mer, I escort Sloane out of the car and into the lobby.
“Thank you for inviting me, Magnus. It was an amazing night,” she says, seemingly under the impression that I’m dumping her in the lobby and leaving.
When I continue to walk her to the elevators, I sense her tense up.
“You don’t have to escort me to my room.”
“Nonsense, what kind of gentleman would I be if I left you here?”
“I thought there were no gentlemen.”
“Exactly,” I say as I press the elevator.
I feel her eyes on me, but I’m not giving her anything until we have some privacy.
When the doors open, Sloane pauses, then cautiously walks in.
I follow her.
When the doors close, I turn on her.
“What was that back at the gala? And don’t you dare say you have no idea what I’m talking about.”
She sighs and turns to me. “It’s what I said after that night in my suite. We can’t do this. You know why.”
“No, I don’t.”
“Yes, you do!” She insists. “Think about why I’m here, Magnus.”
“I know why you’re here, and I don’t care. I know you felt something tonight, something that defies why you came.”
“Which is exactly the problem. I can’t let it defy why I came. I have my brother to think about. I have myself to think about.”
“I told you that you were safe.”
“But I can’t feel safe until this is over. If you really cared about me, you’d understand that.”
The elevator doors open before I can respond. Sloane uses the opportunity to exit. I follow, grabbing her arm before she can run down the hall away from me.
“Is that what’s holding you back? You don’t trust my word?”
“Don’t you have your own agenda?”
“Yes, but that doesn’t interfere with how I feel about you, or my determination to keep you out of danger.”
“Doesn’t it? You could end this today by giving me something real to take back to Gabriel. Something that wouldn’t blow up in my face when he found out you were bluffing. But you’d prefer to do it your way.”
That one gives me pause. “So it’s that I’m not giving you every detailed plan of mine? That’s what’s keeping your guard up?”
“The same way you have yours up with me. Don’t get me wrong, Magnus, I get it. You were right, we’re too alike, both relentless in going after what we want at the expense of everything else. So I don’t resent you for it, but it only proves that we also aren’t the types to let ourselves be overcome with emotion when it complicates things.”
It’s striking how well she knows me. Probably because she’s right, we are alike in that way. Once upon a time, I thought that would make her a perfect match for me. I didn’t realize it would also be what kept us apart.
I let go of her arm. “Just tell me one thing.”
Her chest rises and falls in anticipation. “What’s that?”
“Am I wrong in thinking that you felt something tonight?”
She swallows hard, as though the truth of it hurts.
“No,” she says in a soft voice.
I nod slightly.
Sloane eyes me, waiting for more. When nothing comes from my lips, she takes one step away. “So, is this goodnight?”
“Goodnight, Sloane. I’ll see you in my office come Monday.”
Her eyes blink rapidly as though getting back to business as usual is like a bucket of ice water being dumped on her. But she straightens up and nods, that by-the-book Sloane coming back to the forefront. “Goodnight, Magnus.”
I watch her walk the rest of the way down the hall. Mona’s words come back to taunt me. I’m never one to be hesitant to
