The pain of my own cuts made me clasp a hand to my stomach.
What else could I do? Hand to hand combat wasn’t foreign to an agent. Or knife play. Gun would’ve been nice but noisy, was all I thought as he staggered, fell against the closing door, slid to the floor, and died, gargling his last breath.
Massive blood loss. Cardiac arrest.
The knife had gone up under his ribs and reached precisely where I’d aimed. His heart. Surprising he had one. Emotions were for suckers. Hate though, a little hate leaked in. I kicked him in the face after I stole his gun. Stripped the holster from him quickly, extracted the knife, went through the door and down, out onto the sand.
Wait.
Maybe I should drag his body out of the lighted indoors?
I dithered, staring back up the steps. And what about water and food?
Sand under my feet. Freedom under my feet. Dithering...not the best way to act. I bolted for the boat and, grunting, heaving, pushed it out into the water then leapt in. The waves were small. Even the weather wanted me to go.
Then fucking go.
My calm had fled.
I seated the oars and began to row. Getting out through the breaking waves wasn’t easy, and using the motor would’ve been better if not for the noise. I managed. A breeze tousled my sweaty hair. Only a few lights were on at the mansion. He’d return by car, most likely. I’d seen no headlights signaling his return. I should keep watch for that.
I should try to get a half mile out? The motor would take me a lot further, fast, but would be loud. I’d need to judge when to use it, then head back to land at a wide angle, and find what? How would I leave this country?
I paused to try to figure that out, with my head in my hands. One thing at a time. Planning used to be a strong suit but I was a little messed up. With more distance from him, I’d improve, wouldn’t I?
After I seemed to have rowed a fair distance, I pointed the boat squarely into the waves to give myself time to start the motor.
Waves slapped the underside, splashing spray into the air, onto my face, arms. The moon was rising, sending a dribble of light over the sea. The villa lights showed but I’d heard no sirens. Headlights had shone there but I couldn’t tell who they’d been or if they’d stopped at the villa.
They’d call the police when they found Vitor.
Unless Isak told them not to.
It must be nine or ten by now.
The motor... A big wave slapped the boat’s bow up then down.
The air rang with a high pitched background whine that terminated in a need.
He’d given me some hidden command.
I froze, clutching the sides of the boat with claw-hands.
I knew what was wanted. At the bow was a compartment. The moon couldn’t reach there and it lay in shadow.
Water sloshed under my feet as I moved forward, dreading, ice and heat flushing my veins. He’d put something there, and I had to see what it was.
Had to. I shouldn’t. Eyes wide, heart thumping...I reached.
I flicked open the catch, opened the little compartment door. There sat a device. Sealed in a plastic bag to protect it.
He’d left it for me.
He knew I would be here. My hand shook but I picked it up. Weighty.
It fitted into my palm and I pressed the arrow-shaped play button.
What did I tell you? Follow my rules. Don’t try to thwart me or there will be suffering. Immense suffering. You’ve been bad, Red. Come back to me and I will show you how bad.
“Then I shouldn’t come back,” I whispered, as if he were here beside me.
Come back.
I jumped. Fuck. Tears sprang. I dropped the device into my lap, and it almost slid into the water at the bottom of the boat, except I caught it, saved it. If it fell, he’d be gone. No voice. My fingers wouldn’t let go. Whimpering, I pressed it hard to my forehead.
A recording but he knew me well.
Now, Red.
Mouth trembling, face twitching with muscle tics, I coughed. I swiped my face with my forearm, then pulled up my shirt and wiped off the sweat and spray and tears, again. Don’t do this. Shhh. Shhh.
I very firmly told myself not to do this, again, then I started the motor in two tries, turned the boat, and headed back, jarring over the small waves, with the villa dead ahead in my line of sight.
He’d known I’d do this, had planned this.
He wanted me to try to get away. Why?
Why?
To break that so-called agreement between us? An agreement he’d set up.
Maybe.
Why?
He could’ve done anything to me anyway, couldn’t he?
Why, rattled through my brain as I drew close to the villa.
Because...doing this had let the monster have fun.
He’d turned on floodlights so I could see...them. I passed the first one floating in the sea. The first upturned white face, though she rolled as I chugged past, her clothes swirling, a wave washing over her.
The girl with the chestnut hair. No blood coiled in or stained the water.
Perhaps she’d drowned.
Perhaps an accident. Knew it wasn’t.
I motored further, crunching the bow into the sand, and found three wallowing near the shore. All dead, drowned or strangled or poisoned, what did it matter how it had been done?
I heard him walk up behind me as I stood staring, mind blown by grief.
“What did you do?” I choked, blinded by tears.
“This is the suffering.”
“What did you do?” I
