I scrutinized my face in the mirror. My eyes were red and my cheeks wet. I let the remains of my corset drop to the floor and picked up the nightgown that one of the servants had folded on the chair for me. A choked laugh escaped my mouth after I’d put it on over my bow panties. The part over my breasts was made from lace, but at least it wasn’t see-through, unlike the entire middle of the nightgown. It was the finest gossamer I’d ever seen, and it didn’t leave anything to the imagination. My bare stomach and the panties were on display. It ended above my knees with a hem of more lace. I could just as well walk out of this room naked and be done with it, but I wasn’t that brave.
I washed my makeup off, brushed my teeth, let down my hair, and when I couldn’t prolong the inevitable any longer, I grabbed the door handle. Would it be so bad if I slept in the bathroom?
Taking a deep breath, I opened the door and stepped back into the bedroom. Luca was still sitting in the armchair. The Scotch bottle was almost half-empty. Drunk men were never a good thing. His eyes found me and he laughed without humor. “That’s what you choose to wear when you don’t want me to fuck you?”
I flushed at his crude language. It was the Scotch talking, but I couldn’t tell him to stop drinking. I was toeing the line as it was. “I didn’t choose it.” I crossed my arms, torn between staying on my feet and slipping under the covers of the bed. But lying down felt like a bad idea. I didn’t want to make myself any more vulnerable than I already was. Yet standing in front of Luca half-naked wasn’t the best choice either.
“My stepmother?” he asked.
I nodded simply. He put down his glass and rose. Of course, I flinched. His expression darkened. He didn’t say anything as he walked past me into the bathroom, not even when I gasped as his arm brushed mine. The moment the door closed, I released a harsh breath. Slowly I approached the bed, my eyes finding the light red stain. I perched on the edge of the mattress. Water was running in the bathroom, but eventually Luca would come back out.
I lay down on the edge of the mattress, turned on my side and pulled the covers up to my chin, then squeezed my eyes shut, willing myself to fall asleep. I wanted this day to end, even if it was only the beginning of many hellish days and nights to come.
The water stopped and a few minutes later Luca emerged from the bathroom. I tried to make my breathing even to appear as if I was already sleeping. I risked a quick peek through half-closed eyes, my face mostly covered by the blanket, and turned to stone. Luca was only wearing black briefs. And if Luca was impressive when dressed, he was a whole new level of intimidating when half-naked. He was pure muscle and his skin was littered with scars, some thin and long as if a knife had sliced cleanly through, and some round and rigid as if a bullet had torn into his flesh. Letters were inked into the skin over his heart. I couldn’t read them from afar, but I had a feeling it was their motto. “Born in blood. Sworn in blood. I enter alive and I leave dead.”
He walked over to the main light switch and turned it off, bathing us in darkness. Suddenly I felt like I was alone in a forest at night, knowing that somewhere something was stalking me. The bed dipped under Luca’s weight, and I clutched the edge of the bedframe. I pressed my lips together, allowing myself only shallow breaths.
The mattress shifted when Luca lay down. I held my breath, waiting for him to reach out for me and take what was his. Would it always be like this? Would I be miserable for the rest of my life? My nights filled with fear?
The pressure of the last few weeks, or maybe even years, crashed down on me. Helplessness, fear and anger washed over me. Hatred for my father filled me up, but even worse was the hot knife of disappointment and sadness. He’d given me to a man he didn’t know anything about, except for his reputation as a skilled killer; he’d offered me to the enemy to do with as he pleased. The man who should have protected me from harm had shoved me into the arms of a monster for the sole purpose of securing power.
Hot tears spilled out of my eyes, but the weight on my chest didn’t lift. It grew heavier and heavier until I couldn’t hold it in anymore and a gasped sob burst out of me. Get yourself under control, Aria. I tried to fight it, but another choked sob slipped past my lips.
“Will you cry all night?” came Luca’s cold voice out of the blackness. Of course, he wasn’t asleep yet. For a man in his position, it was best to always keep an eye open.
I buried my face into the pillow but now that the floodgates had opened, I couldn’t close them again.
“I can’t see how you could possibly have cried any worse, if I’d taken you. Maybe I should fuck you to give you a real reason to cry.”
I pulled my legs up against my chest, making myself as small as possible. I knew I needed to stop. I hadn’t been beaten or worse, but I couldn’t get a grip on my emotions.
Luca moved and a soft light flooded the room. He’d turned on the lamp on his nightstand. I waited. I knew he was watching me, but
