“Suck me harder and keep looking at me with your fucking beautiful eyes.”
I fixed my gaze on him and took him into my mouth until he hit the back of my throat, then bobbed my head up and down fast and hard, my lips tight around him. Luca moaned, his hips rocking lightly. His eyes burnt into me, his teeth gritted. “If you don’t want to swallow, you need to get away…”
I jerked away, releasing him with a pop, and a moment later he spilled his seed on his stomach and legs. Luca closed his eyes as his erection twitched. His hand was still in my hair, gently stroking my neck and scalp. Slowly he eased it down, but I gripped his hand and pressed my cheek into it, needing his closeness after what we’d done. His eyes flew open with an unreadable look in them. His thumb brushed my cheekbone gently. We stayed like that for a couple of heartbeats, then Luca sat up, taking in the mess on his upper thighs and abs. “I need a fucking shower.” Luca reached for a tissue and cleaned off the sperm before swinging his legs out and standing.
I nodded, strangely disappointed that he’d slip out of bed so quickly. I felt suddenly self-conscious about what I’d done.
Luca held out his hand. “Come on. I don’t want to shower alone.”
I scrambled off the bed, put my hand in his and followed him into the bathroom.
As the hot water poured down on us, Luca began lathering my body with soap and I closed my eyes, enjoying the feel of his hands on me. He pressed up to my back, one arm circling my stomach. “So was it okay for you?” he asked quietly.
He was probably worried I wouldn’t go down on him again, if it wasn’t. “Yeah.”
He kissed my throat. He did that a lot. It felt so gentle, loving and intimate, but I knew it wasn’t meant like that. “I’m glad, because I really enjoy being in your mouth.”
I flushed with embarrassment and a strange sense of accomplishment. Ridiculous. “Are you angry that I didn’t, you know, swallow? I bet the women you’ve been with so far always did.”
“No, I’m not angry. I won’t lie, I’d love to come in your mouth but if you don’t want that, it’s okay.”
We stepped out of the shower and dried off before we crawled back into bed. I rested my head on Luca’s chest. He turned off the lights, bathing us in darkness. He lightly stroked my hip, and the touch and his warmth made feel safe enough to ask a question that had been bothering me for years. “When your father told you to marry me, what was your reaction?” I murmured.
Luca’s fingers on my hips paused. “I’d expected it. I knew I’d have to marry for tactical reasons. As future Capo, you can’t let emotions or desires rule any part of your life.”
I was glad for the darkness so Luca couldn’t see my face. He sounded so detached and emotionless. His touches and kisses made me want to believe that maybe he was starting to care for me, but now I wasn’t so sure anymore.
“And what about you?” he asked.
“I was terrified.”
“You were only fifteen. Of course, you were terrified.”
“I was still terrified on the day of our marriage. I’m still not entirely sure you don’t terrify me.”
Luca was silent a moment, as if he didn’t know how to react to my admission. “I told you, you have no reason to fear me. I’ll protect and take care of you. I’ll give you anything you want and need.”
Except for one thing: love.
“But the Famiglia always comes first,” I said lightly. “If you had to kill me to protect the business, you would.”
Luca became rigid, but he didn’t deny it. My father always said there’s only room for one true love in the life of a Made Man, and that’s the mafia.
CHAPTER TWELVE
Gianna managed to get a ticket for a flight two days later. I was brimming with excitement that day. It hadn’t been long since I’d last seen her, but it felt like an eternity. It was already getting dark outside when Luca and I pulled up at JFK. I wished Gianna could have gotten a morning or afternoon flight instead.
Since my comment that Luca would kill me in order to protect the Famiglia, he’d been emotionally withdrawn, not that he’d been an open book before that. The only way we interacted was at night when Luca pleasured me with his hands and mouth, and I him in turn. Maybe without Gianna’s impending visit, I’d have tried to talk to him or even pleaded with him to show me where he worked; instead I’d given him the space he obviously wanted.
Luca parked the car close to the terminal where Gianna would arrive and we got out. He didn’t try to take my hand. I didn’t think he was the type of man who held hands, but he touched my lower back as we entered the arrival area of the airport.
“Are you sure you’ll be okay with Gianna staying with us for the next few days?”
“Yes. And I promised your father to protect her. It’s easier when she’s living in our apartment.”
“She will provoke you,” I said.
“I can handle a little girl.”
“She’s not that little. She’s barely younger than me.”
“I can handle her.”
“Luca,” I said firmly. “Gianna knows how to push people’s buttons. If you aren’t absolutely sure that you can control yourself, I won’t let her near you.”
Luca’s eyes blazed. He’d been on edge all day. “Don’t worry. I won’t kill her or you in the next few days.”
I took a step back. Where did that come from? Was he angry because of what I’d said? It was the truth; we both knew it.
“Aria!”
I whirled around. Gianna rushed toward me, dropping her
