“Try to enjoy the day. You’ve been looking forward to dress shopping for years.”
I put my hand over Anna’s. “I will, don’t worry. This dress is about me, not Danilo. I won’t waste any thoughts on him.”
But I still wished Mom had made an appointment for wedding-dress shopping sooner—before the party; before I realized my fiancé wasn’t what my silly hopes had made him out to be.
We were already late by wedding-planner standards. Six months before the wedding was the magical date to order a dress, but Mom had insisted we wait a bit longer. I had a feeling she was being superstitious, as if we’d be tempting fate if we bought the dress too soon, as if history might repeat itself. Emma had already bought her dress a few weeks before Christmas.
Anna had arrived the night before, and we’d watched movies and talked until way past midnight, so we both had trouble getting up early for the appointment.
“Sofia! Anna!”
Anna and I grabbed our purses and headed downstairs. Mom was already waiting, dressed in a thick winter coat and looking impatient.
We put our own coats on before we headed toward the car in the driveway. Samuel was at the steering wheel. Carlo and two other bodyguards would follow us in a separate car.
Samuel gave me a tight smile before we headed out. I’d been present when Emma had chosen her dress, and I hoped my brother would love it as much as I did. I was sad that Emma couldn’t make it today, but what saddened me even more was that Fina wasn’t with me. Whenever I’d imagined this day as a young girl, both Mom and Fina had been present. Now, my sister was thousands of miles away from me. I hadn’t seen or heard from her in more than five years, and now that my wedding day was nearing, I was desperate to talk to her.
We pulled up in front of the best bridal store in Minneapolis.
When we stepped into the bright store, giddiness replaced my sadness. Hundreds of dresses lined the walls on two levels, an endless array of different shades of white. In the past, I’d always seen myself in a princess gown with lace, rhinestones, and a full skirt. Just like a Disney princess, as Anna always put it, but I wasn’t that same naïve girl anymore. I knew Prince Charming didn’t exist in real life.
The saleswoman, a voluptuous woman in her late fifties with bright red lipstick and long nails the same color, greeted us with a tray of champagne. Mom pursed her lips when Anna and I reached for the elegant flutes but didn’t comment. The saleswoman led us into a separate fitting room that held only the most exclusive pieces how she assured us.
“Why don’t you browse the dresses and pick five or six of your favorites to try on? I recommend against choosing more than that, because eventually they’ll just start to blend into each other, and you’ll be overwhelmed.” With a bright smile, she left to give us privacy.
Mom and Anna turned to me.
“Do you have a vision of how you’d like to look?” Mom asked.
“Elegant. I’d like a veil, but nothing too flashy or puffy.”
My mother exchanged a look of surprise with Anna.
“Why don’t you show us an example, so we’ll know what to look for?” Mom said.
I approached the dresses to my right and pulled out an ivory-white off-shoulder dress with long sleeves. I stared at the dress, felt the silk-like material, and knew I needed to try it on immediately. “Like this,” I whispered.
“Try it on,” Anna urged, practically shoving me toward the changing room, as if she could sense it might be the dress.
I didn’t dare think I could have found my dress on the first try. That seemed like fate, and so far, fate hadn’t really been kind to me or my family.
The saleswoman joined me in the cabin to help me dress, then went to fetch a narrow underskirt to keep the fine, flowy skirt away from my legs so I wouldn’t step on it. There wasn’t a mirror in the changing room, and yet the dress felt perfect already, as if it had been made just for me.
The moment I stepped out from behind the curtain, Mom and Anna stopped what they were doing and watched me. My heart pounded wildly as I made my way toward a small pedestal and the surrounding mirrors.
When I saw myself, I had no doubt that I’d found my dress. The fabric was airy, a mesh of fine layers. The off-shoulder design was daring. Lace trimmed the bodice that wrapped around my body and dipped low to reveal my shoulders, collarbones, upper arms, and down to the swell of my breasts. The slight sweetheart neckline accentuated my chest. The sleeves ended in the middle of my forearms, and the full skirt flowed elegantly around my legs.
“Perfect,” Mom gushed.
Anna nodded. It was probably the first time I’d ever seen her speechless.
The saleswoman appeared with a simple, elegant veil that she attached to my head with a jewel-studded hair piece.
Mom sucked in a deep breath when the veil fell down my face. If Fina had gotten the chance to walk down the aisle, she would have worn a veil similar to this in style as was tradition in our family.
“Danilo will be blown away,” Mom whispered.
“I love it,” I said simply.
Anna touched my bare shoulder. “Then you should get it. You’re the bride, and all that matters is that you love it . . . and yourself.” The last words were said very quietly.
I smiled. “This is my dress. I don’t need to try on anything else. I love myself in it.”
I hadn’t seen Danilo since that night, nor had I seen Anna since we’d gone shopping for my wedding dress. I spoke to Anna on the phone almost daily, but Danilo had stopped
