“Was it ever like this with a woman?”
Giulia’s voice was curious, but behind it, I could hear a flicker of… jealousy perhaps. I didn’t have to lie. “No. Not with Gaia, and before her I only had affairs.”
“And after?”
“There was no one after.”
Giulia peered up in surprise. “Really? You didn’t sleep with anyone since Gaia’s death?”
“No. I had other things on my mind.” I hesitated, wondering if I should tell her about that one slip. “But right after I found Gaia with Andrea, I slept with a woman I met when I was drunk in a bar. It was meant as a revenge fuck. To prove to myself that other women wanted me even if my own wife didn’t. I didn’t feel better afterward and never told Gaia.”
“I want only you, and when other women check you out, I don’t like it at all.”
A laugh burst out of me. “Jealous?”
“A bit.” She swung herself up and straddled my hips. “Like you, I don’t like to share.”
She didn’t have to worry. “To be honest, you’re demanding enough. I doubt I could satisfy another woman beside you.”
Her eyes widened in indignation. I flipped her over despite her pretend struggles and slammed into her, fucking her hard and fast, because there was no need to confirm what I felt anymore.
Giulia organized Simona’s first birthday party in January, baking a cake and decorating everything with balloons. My family came over around teatime.
Simona had done her first steps by now and followed Giulia like a puppy. She was too young to remember her mother. For her, there was only Giulia.
Faro and his wife and two children were invited as well. He joined me in a quiet moment. “She got Daniele to talk again.”
I nodded, following Giulia with my eyes. She righted the sunflower in Simona’s hair. My daughter’s dress also had a sunflower print. She looked adorable, so I gave up protesting. “She did. She’s good with the kids.”
“And good with you,” Faro said with a suggestive grin.
I narrowed my eyes.
“Come on, Cassio. It’s like you fell into the fountain of youth, and you’re less cranky than in the past. I’m happy for you.”
I didn’t say anything.
“Your father approached me.” From the change in Faro’s voice, I knew I wouldn’t like what he had to say.
“What did he want?”
“He asked me to talk to you about having a child with Giulia. He thinks you should be prepared for any eventualities.”
“The eventualities being that Daniele’s not my son?” I gritted out.
Faro shrugged. “It is an option, and not an unlikely one at that.”
“I don’t need another child, and I certainly don’t need you or my father to meddle in my business.”
Faro raised his arms. “I didn’t want to meddle. That’s why I told you. But your dad won’t give up anytime soon. He’s worried.”
“If he accepted that Daniele and Simona are my kids, he could stop worrying.”
“You tell him.”
I made my way over to my parents, who were talking to Mia, who was cradling her newborn son in her arms. She looked exhausted.
“Stop it, Father.”
He knew what I meant without me having to elaborate. “I’m trying to think of your future.”
I motioned toward Daniele, who was holding Simona’s hand since she was still a bit unsteady on her legs. “There is my future. End of story.”
Mother touched my forearm. “We love them, but—”
“No but.”
They exchanged a look then nodded reluctantly.
Mia gave me a proud smile.
I hoped this matter was settled once and for all. The more Father kept digging, the likelier it was that word about this would get out.
After everyone was gone, Giulia and I played a round of pool. I needed the distraction, and she’d become quite good at distracting me.
“Tomorrow, you need to take Daniele to a preschool orientation. I made an appointment a few days ago.”
Bent over the table, Giulia froze. Then she straightened. “What? Why?”
“I want him to be around other kids. This preschool only takes in kids from our circles or our business associates. Daniele will be around his future soldiers. He’ll learn to assert himself among the other boys. If he’s only around you, he might become too soft.”
Anger crossed her face. I shook my head. “It’s a fact. You can’t help it. And I only spend the evenings and weekends with him. He needs to brawl and meet unruly boys.”
“Don’t interrupt me. You don’t even know what I was going to say.” Her tone set my teeth on edge. After the thing with my father today, I’d been eager for a fight.
“Then say what you want to say.”
“You should have discussed your plans with me.”
“My decision is made. Daniele needs the change.”
Giulia jabbed her finger against my chest. “Even so, we’re a family. I’m your wife. I deserve to be involved in a decision like that!”
“They’re my kids, Giulia.”
Her hurt hit me unexpectedly.
“No,” she said fiercely. “They are our kids, Cassio. I told you before and I’ll tell you again. I love all three of you.”
I stared, my anger slipping away faster than quicksand. “What?”
She nodded, looking furious. “You heard me. They aren’t just your kids. They are mine too. You can’t call them yours when you see fit. They are always ours, yours and mine. Maybe not by blood, but I’d bleed for them all the same. So don’t talk to me like these two kids don’t mean anything to me when they mean everything. Just like their stubborn, idiotic father.”
It was the first time Giulia had insulted me. The first time she’d gotten loud, almost screaming. Her anger didn’t kindle my own like it had done with Gaia in the past, because Giulia’s words were the best thing I’d ever heard. My thoughts tumbled over each other. Still, a small sliver of doubt remained as if my fucked-up mind couldn’t accept that someone as good, as kind, as loving
