“I can’t, Jack,” I choked out. I hadn’t even realized that tears were streaming down my face. “He betrayed me. He was using me to hurt you.”
“He has to care about you, Vera.”
“He doesn’t,” I sobbed.
“The second Joseph told me that Hamilton had his eye on you, I knew it was all a ploy. This isn’t the first time my son has lashed out. I didn’t think anything of it. But then I noticed a shift last night. I know my son. Hamilton loves fiercely, and Vera, he loves you. I can see it clear as day.”
I crossed my arms over my chest, letting the chill of the air wash over me. “I don’t love him.”
“You can’t bullshit a bullshitter, Vera. You love him too.”
“It doesn’t matter!” I yelled. “I can’t be with someone who hurt me like that.”
Jack pressed his lips into a fine line. I waited with bated breath for him to speak. “You’re going to have to get over that. If you want to protect your mother and finish your degree, you’ll help me. I might be a changed man, but I’ll still do whatever it takes to fix my family. I don’t care how your feelings have changed. You want your mother out of that house with Joseph? You will stay. You will fix things with Hamilton.”
I stood up and paced the deck. How could Jack ask this of me? What was he thinking?
Debating my options, I realized I didn’t have much of a choice. I needed to get my mother out of that situation. I needed to finish school so I could be self-sufficient. Could I help Jack while protecting my heart? Could I honestly try to fix years of pain? “I’m not even sure I’m capable of mending your relationship with Hamilton, Jack.”
“All I ask is that you try. All I ask is that you stay.”
“You can’t force me to love him, Jack.”
“I’m not asking you to. I’m just asking you to give our family a second chance.”
I looked up at Jack, seeing him with fresh eyes and a hardened heart. I knew my answer would change the trajectory of my life. Once again I had a decision to make. My mother’s safety and happiness, or mine. It was a tragic sacrifice. A consequence. I spent so long running from my feelings for Hamilton, and now his family wanted me to run headfirst back into his welcoming arms.
Rustling in the distance drew my attention back to the tree line. Hamilton emerged with his shoulders slumped. I could sense his pain even from here. Broken. Hardened. Defeated. Even now, I wanted nothing more than to run to him. I wanted to be better again. I wanted to seek the comfort of his arms and dive into the compatibility we shared.
But if I were going to do this—if I were going to help Jack and save my mother—then I’d have to do it with a clear head. I refused to give Hamilton my heart again.
“So?” Jack asked. “What’s it going to be?”
I let out an exhale. “I want Mom here by tomorrow,” I replied. “And I don’t want you to punish either of us if I fail.”
“Deal.”
I stared at Hamilton once more. His hungry eyes were locked on me. Pain felt like a tangible entity between us. “I’ll try.”
A Note from the Author
Thank you so much for reading. Thorns and Forgiveness, the conclusion to Hamilton and Vera’s story, will release January, 2021.
Preorder your copy:
www.authorcoraleejune.com
Acknowledgments
This book would not have been possible without the support and love of Christina Santos, as well as Christine Estevez with Wildfire Marketing.
I would like to especially thank Katie Friend, Meggan Reed, HarleyQuinn Zaler, Savannah Richey, Lauren Campbell and Claire Jones for beta reading.
I am grateful to all of those with whom we have had the pleasure to work with during this book. I’d like to especially recognize my editor, Helayna Trask. She always takes the time to dive into the worlds we create and make sure they are perfect for you all. I would also like to thank all the dedicated members of The Zone and Cora’s Crew. And finally, thank you again to HarleyQuinn Zaler for this drool-worthy cover.
I started writing this book almost a year ago, and picked it back up on a whim. I had zero plans of releasing it this year, and wasn’t sure I could get inside Vera’s head. But the second I started writing, I just couldn’t stop.
I can relate to Vera in many ways. There comes a time in all our lives when we stop seeing our parents as super heroes and start seeing them as humans—and humans are beautifully flawed in so many ways. It can be jarring when you catch your first glimpse of their shortcomings. I once read a quote that said, “We always talk about how parents get to watch their kids grow up, but kids get to watch their parents grow up, too. They just don’t realize it.”
Disclaimer: I promise that this book is entirely a work of fiction. Lilah was not modeled after any of the people that raised me. I have four amazing parents. It’s just…the older I get, the more I realize that my perceptions of normal were shaped by incredible people that worked hard to give me a safe childhood. A lot of times we look at our parents strengths and how they shaped us, but I think it’s important to recognize that their weaknesses help us grow, too.
Vera’s journey made me examine my own role as a mother. While writing the tail end of this book, I had a very devastating miscarriage that rocked me. I sat on my bed and sobbed for what felt like hours, and hadn’t noticed my oldest daughter sneaking into my bedroom with a candy bar to make me smile, and a roll of toilet paper to wipe my tears. We cuddled. She asked why I was crying and I
