As she was looking through the apartment listings an email notification popped up from her good friend from school. She clicked on it to open it.
Stacy –
I just wanted you to know that your dad called me last night. He asked me to convey a message to you because he didn’t know how to reach you. He asked me to tell you that he is giving you one more chance to change your mind about staying in Charlotte.
What is he talking about? What is going on with you? Call me if you can.
Stacy picked up her phone and dialed Amanda.
“What the hell is going on Stacy?” The voice at the other end said.
“Well hello to you too, Amanda. Sorry about my dad calling you. He’s being a complete asshole and showed up here last week, trying to bully me into coming back there with him. He said some pretty hateful things to my sister Shawn. I can’t believe he got you involved.” Stacy said, rubbing her forehead in frustration.
“Oh don’t worry about that. I just wanted to make sure you’re alright. You know I love you.” Amanda responded.
“I know and thank you. I hope to have an apartment soon and then you need to come visit me!” Stacy said. She heard movement from upstairs and was anxious to talk to her sister. “Listen Amanda, I’m sorry to cut this short but I need to chat with my sister before I hit the hay. I’ll call you later okay?” She hung up the phone and headed upstairs.
“Well good morning or should I say good night?” Rebecca smiled as Stacy entered the kitchen.
Stacy could immediately sense the lightness in Rebecca. She hugged her tight. “I’m taking your mood as a sign that the car in the driveway is a good thing?”
“It’s a very good thing. Shawn should be down in a minute and she can tell you herself.” Rebecca said as she began to pull breakfast items from the fridge. “I’m starving. I feel like I have my life back and apparently that makes me want to eat.”
“Right, it doesn’t have anything to do with the fact that you’re eating for two?” Shawn said teasingly as she entered the kitchen. She pulled Rebecca into her arms and kissed her.
Stacy gave an exaggerated cough as their kiss continued. “Listen ladies, I love you both but seriously, you’re making me jealous okay?” She laughed.
“Oh seriously; I’m sure all the guys down at the precinct are drooling all over you already so I’m sure you won’t be lonely for long!” Shawn laughed.
Stacy rolled her eyes. “It’s like working with junior high boys. They are so obvious with their stares and lines. Besides, I have enough to worry about without complicating things with worrying about someone else.” She said with a shake of her head.
“So listen. We are going to have Sam and Jenna over for dinner tonight and we want you to be here also since you’re not working. Is that okay?” Shawn asked her. “I’d like to talk to all of you at once about this past week.”
“Of course I’ll be here.” Stacy said kissing Shawn on the cheek. “I’m glad you’re home. But now, I’m off to bed. I’m exhausted. I’ll see you guys tonight.”
****
Later that evening, they all sat around the dining room table at Rebecca and Shawn’s house. They laughed and talked as they ate. Shawn looked around the table and smiled.
“I wanted to talk to all of you about this past week.” Shawn said. “First of all, I want to apologize to all of you for making you worry and also for being here for Rebecca.”
Rebecca reached under the table and squeezed Shawn’s knee as she spoke. Her quiet encouragement gave Shawn the support she needed to speak openly about the darkest part of her life.
“I know that you all know things haven’t been easy for me with mom and dad since I came out. Their behavior, things they’ve said and done, have scarred me deeply. I have never been able to talk about it; I just buried it and focused on living day to day.” Shawn looked down and squeezed her hand over Rebecca’s.
“I don’t know how to really explain this, but the night I left, I drove until I had no idea where I was at. I pulled over and checked in to a motel. I don’t know a better way to convey what I was thinking or feeling other than to say, I felt like I was in a cave. Alone.” She looked up into Rebecca’s eyes and saw only love in them.
“You are never alone Shawn. Please remember that.” Sam said quietly. “I’m sorry that you felt like you were.”
“It’s nothing that any of you did or didn’t do. I know you are all here for me. I just, well, I guess I just broke when father said that the world would have been better off if I wasn’t born. I just kept thinking that maybe he was right. Maybe if I wasn’t here, you and Stacy wouldn’t be in the position you are in now with our parents.” Shawn shook her head. “But then something happened. I went to a diner nearby to get some food and the waitress there was so kind to me.”
Shawn wiped her eyes. “She made me realize how much I wish I had a parent that loved me, cared for me, was compassionate to me. I went back again and she was there. She sat down and talked with me. She said she felt drawn to me, like she was meant to share her story with me. She told me about her daughter and how she treated her when she came out to her. Her daughter ended up killing herself because she felt so alone, worthless and ashamed. She told me to not waste my time worrying about their approval or basing
