Guilt was riding him hard. It was the first time in memory that he’d ever hurt a woman in bed, and he didn’t like the feeling. His teeth ground together. If only she’d told him! He’d have made her glory in that sweet sacrifice. Of course, he had to admit that it could have been worse. He’d aroused her totally, and he’d treated her like a virgin, as if maybe subconsciously he had known. A man without scruples could have done her a lot more damage. He frowned, thinking about Allison in bed with some other man. It made him livid with jealousy.
“A nurse, of all things,” he said curtly, glaring at her. “It’s a miracle that you reached your present age intact. Don’t they teach you anything about sex in nurses’ training?”
She went scarlet and wouldn’t look at him. “It isn’t the same as reading about it,” she said stiffly.
His jaw clenched. “No doubt. You little fool, if I’d known, I could have made you faint with the pleasure! God knows, I had the experience to give you that. I hurt you. My conscience is giving me hell. Damn it, Allison, if I’d known, I could have stopped!”
She turned, her eyes shy but knowing. “Could you, Gene?” she asked sadly.
He averted his eyes to the wall. No, of course he couldn’t have. But it made him feel better to think so. “Dwight will have to have around-the-clock nursing when he comes home. He’s got some internal injuries and a busted rib besides the concussion.”
“It shouldn’t be too difficult finding someone,” she said slowly, although she had her doubts after what Tina Gates had said about the shortage of nurses around here.
He whirled and stared at her. “He likes you.” Was he out of his mind, he wondered? The very last thing she’d agree to was a job that put her near him. But the thought was intriguing. Having her in his home, near him, being able to look at her whenever he liked would be so sweet. He caught his breath at the very thought of it.
Allison was catching her own breath. She didn’t want to be near him, not at any price. “No,” she said hastily. “No, I can’t do it. I have to go back to Arizona.”
He moved toward her, and she backed up a step, afraid to be close to him again. What had happened once was never going to be allowed to happen again.
Gene stopped. He understood that timid retreat. He’d hurt her, mentally and physically. She had every right to be intimidated by him.
“Dwight needs you,” he said softly. Charm had never meant much to him before, but if he could lure her home with him, he might have a chance that she’d begin to trust him. “Winnie would be grateful,” he coaxed. “And so would Marie and I.”
“You needn’t pretend that you want me around, Gene,” she replied miserably. “You can find someone else to sit with Dwight.”
“He has nothing to do with you and me,” he said after a minute, his eyes narrow and steady on her face. “He’s my brother, honey. I love him.”
That got to her when nothing else had. She clasped her hands tightly together. “I thought you’d decided you weren’t part of his family anymore,” she murmured.
He sighed. “So I had. Until I heard he’d been hurt. Strange how nothing else seems to matter when someone’s near death. I thought of all the good times we had as kids, all the games we played together, all the mischief we got into.” A faint smile came to his thin lips. “Even if there wasn’t much blood tying us together, we were the best of friends. Marie and I fight, but we’d die for each other. I guess I’ve been living inside myself without a thought to how it affected them.” He looked straight at her. “It’s still hard for me. But I think we can work it out now, if I don’t have to worry about somebody to take care of Dwight. The hospital is short staffed.”
“Tina told me,” she said. She wrapped her arms around her breasts and turned away, head bent.
He moved closer, keeping some distance between them so that she wouldn’t feel uncomfortable. “You can’t regret what happened any more than I do, sweetheart,” he said unexpectedly, and in a tone that made her legs tremble. “I’m sorry.”
Her eyes closed. “It was my fault, too,” she replied huskily, shaken by his compassion and the soft endearment. “Can we...not talk about it anymore, please?”
“Can I assume that since you’ve had medical training, you knew how to take care of yourself after what we did?” he persisted, holding his breath while he waited for her reply. He knew he hadn’t taken any precautions, and he was pretty sure she hadn’t. But he wanted to know.
She didn’t look at him. “It wasn’t a dangerous time of the month, if that’s what you’re asking,” she said, coloring.
He let out a heavy sigh. “Allison,” he said softly, “that wasn’t what I asked.”
She bit her lower lip. “I think it’s too late to do anything now,” she said, averting her gaze to the window.
“I see.” He moved again, towering over her. “A few weeks, then...until we know for certain?” he asked quietly.
She didn’t look up, but she nodded.
He started to speak, but anything he said would be the wrong thing now. His shoulders lifted and fell in
