Natalie wanted to go through the sidewalk. Her eyes brimmed over with tears. “I didn’t!” she tried to defend herself, almost choking on the words.
“There’s no use denying it. Vivian saw you,” he said with magnificent contempt. “She told me.”
It was a lie, but he believed it. Maybe he wanted to believe it. He’d said that they had no future together, and this would make the perfect excuse for him to push her out of his life. Nothing she said was going to make any difference. He simply did not want her, and he was making it clear.
She’d thought the pain was bad before. Now it was unbearable.
“All of us trusted you, made you part of our family. And this is how you repaid us, by betraying Vivian, who never did anything to hurt you.” His tone was vicious, furious. “Not only that, Natalie, you didn’t even try to apologize for it.”
She lifted her face defiantly. “I have nothing to apologize for,” she said in a husky, hoarse tone.
“Then we have nothing to say to each other, ever again,” he replied harshly.
“Mack, if you’d just let me try to explain,” she said, hoping for a miracle. “Calm down and talk to me.”
“I am calm,” he said in an icy tone. “What did you expect, anyway? A proposal of marriage?” He laughed bitterly. “You know where I stand on that issue. And even if I were in the mood for it, it wouldn’t be with a woman who’d sell me out the minute the ring was on her finger. You went to him afterward,” he gritted, “and you as much as told me you were going to. But if you think I’m jealous, honey, you’re dead wrong. You were Vivian’s friend, but I never wanted you hanging around my house. I tolerated you for Vivian’s sake.”
“I see.” Her face was white and she was aware of pitying, embarrassed looks around her, because he was eloquent.
He hardened his heart, bristling with wounded pride as he looked at her, furious at his own weakness. Well, never again. “Which reminds me, Natalie,” he added coldly, “I suppose it goes without saying that you’re not welcome at the ranch anymore.”
She lifted her eyes to his hard face and nodded slowly. “Yes, Mack,” she said in a subdued tone. “It does go without saying.”
Her heart was breaking. She turned away from that accusing, contemptuous gaze and walked briskly down the street to get away from him. She didn’t know how she was going to bear this latest outrage of Vivian’s. It had cost her Mack, whom she loved more than her own life. And he hated her. He hated her!
The bystanders were still staring at Mack when she was out of sight, but he didn’t say a word. He stalked into the bank, noticing that people almost fell over trying to get out of his way. He was furious. After going right out of his arms into Whit’s, she’d had the gall to try and deny it, even when Vivian had seen her with Whit! He would never trust his instincts about women again, he decided. If he could be fooled that easily, for that long, he was safer going around with Glenna. She might not be virtuous, but at least she was loyal—in her fashion.
Natalie went home with her heart around her knees. She made supper but couldn’t eat it. She’d assumed that Mack was making assumptions. It hadn’t occurred to her that Vivian would tell such a lie, or that Mack would believe it. But she’d helped things along by making those remarks to Mack in frustration when he’d put her out of the office after their tempestuous interlude. She hadn’t wanted Whit, ever. But nobody would believe that now. She’d lost not only Mack, but the only family she’d known for years. She went to bed and lay awake most of the night, wretched and alone.
She wondered how she could go on living in the same town with the Killains and see Mack and Vivian and the boys week after week. Did Bob and Charles hate her, too? Was it a wholesale contempt? Vivian had lied. That a woman she’d considered her best friend could treat her so callously hurt tremendously. Perhaps she was doomed to a life without affection. God knew that her aunt, old Mrs. Barnes, had only brought her from the orphanage to be a housekeeper and part-time nurse until the old lady died. No one had ever loved her. She’d wanted Mack to. She’d even thought at odd moments that he did, somehow. But the hatred in his eyes was damning. If he’d loved her, he’d have at least given her the benefit of the doubt.
But he hadn’t. He’d believed Vivian without hesitation. So all her dreams of love eternal had gone up in smoke. There was nothing left except to make a decision about what she was going to do with the rest of her life. She knew immediately that she couldn’t stay in Medicine Ridge. She would have to leave. Next week, after graduation, she was going to talk to one of her instructors who’d told her she knew of a job opening in a Dallas school where a relative was principal. Dallas sounded like a nice place to live.
Natalie marched in with her class to the baccalaureate service, trying not to notice how many of her classmates’ whole families had come to see them in their caps and gowns. It was a brief service, held in the college chapel with a guest speaker who was some sort of well-known political figure. Natalie barely heard what went on around her because she was so heartbroken.
When the service was over, she greeted classmates she knew and drove herself home. The next morning, she got up early to go to the college with her gown for the graduation exercises. She felt very proud of her accomplishment as
