But it’s just too scary to get my heart involved all the way. It will take me a long time to trust again.
I hope he has the patience.
I hope I don’t fail him.
Walking to me he squats and asks, “You okay if I don’t go to the hospital? Will you worry? Because I can go if that will make you feel better.”
I stare at him a moment and slide off the couch to melt into his body, sliding my arm around him and closing my eyes against his clavicle as he sits back on the floor and holds me tight. “Why are you so nice to me?”
“Because I like you.” He kisses the top of my head as I feel his chest rising with steady breaths.
“I’m sorry you got hurt because of me,” I whisper.
He strokes my back. “Shhhh, don’t ever think that again. I wanted to do this. I needed to. You know what I don’t want? You apologizing. You have nothing to say you’re sorry for.” He cranes his head, eyes sparkling with humor so he can make me feel better. “Unless you leave me tomorrow. That would suck.”
Shaking my head I bite my smiling lip. “I guess I won’t say I’m sorry again.”
His sister makes a noise like she’s never seen anything cuter. “Tonk, just in case you are wondering, not like you ever cared about my opinion, but in case you do…I like her. And of course I’m already in love with my mini me.”
Tonk Sr. laughs, “Careful, she might try to convince you guys to come back to Louisiana so the kids can grow up together.”
Tonk jokes, “Let me just get packed.”
Celia hands my daughter to her dad. “Look at what a little angel she is.”
Cradling her he mutters, “Then she shouldn’t share your name.”
Celia smacks him and he laughs.
His weathered features soften as tiny fingers reach in the air. Enamored is the only way to describe his face as he stares at her and tells his son, “Yeah, you did real good.”
CHAPTER 11
STACY
Three days later.
It’s Sunday morning at the coffee shop around the corner from where we live, Tonk’s favorite place to start a day. He has my daughter on his lap while he enjoys a café mocha. She’s making all kinds of happy noises today. I’m sipping chamomile tea and hiding my smile behind my white cup.
“Stacy, it might be my imagination or my ego, but I think she’s really starting to like me.”
I know the feeling.
“It’s not your imagination. But it is your ego.”
His head throws back on a laugh, brown eyes sparkling as they look over to the door. Because of his changed expression, I follow his gaze and see a girl walking in with two armloads of multicolored tulips wrapped in twine and brown paper.
It’s like someone bagged spring.
I start to tell him how pretty they are when she surprises me by walking to our table and asking, “Stacy?” her ponytail finally settling down.
“Yes?”
Her coiled arms unwind and suddenly I am holding the flowers, shocked as I see Tonk's pride smiling back at me. The girl flips around, ponytail smacking the side of her head on her way out.
My mouth could hold a tennis ball. “For me?”
Tonk turns Celia around and stands her up as she kicks his legs. He lifts her hand to make her wave to me. “Happy Mother’s Day, Mommy.”
Oh my gosh, how I melt. “For me? Tonk, I can’t believe it. They’re gorgeous!”
“I got all they had. It’s your special day. You made this little one right here.” He raises her arms and she smiles at me.
I laugh and drop my gaze to their beauty. It’s like looking at my new future, one so bright and colorful it’s hard to believe. This is just one more display of his kindness.
He’s been so careful with me.
Thoughtful.
Easy to be around.
We haven’t had sex. These first few nights when we’ve gotten ready for bed, he’s warned me that his head is healing and he needs time. I know he does that so I don’t have to ask for patience.
We’ve stayed up late getting to know each other, telling stories from our childhoods, and expressing our dreams that we had long before we met. I told him I dreamed of being a travel journalist, but turns out I get sick on planes. I also hoped to have a restaurant that made the best grilled cheese—that dream I had at age ten.
He wanted to be a researcher when he was twelve. Then scientist. Philosopher came next. And when that goal dissipated, he waited until he found a calling, reading and getting by on acquiring knowledge and living a peaceful life among wild people. They brought him constant entertainment, so he never needed a television show to occupy his time. He told me how he found his calling and I wanted to hug his sister when I heard it.
Spooning with him while we slept has been perfect. At first I slept tense. But last night I relaxed more, and when I woke up today, Tonk and I were pretzeled. It felt really great.
“There are so many of them it’s hard to get up so I can kiss you and thank you!” As I stand, I overdo it, wrestling and grunting. He laughs, which is what I wanted. I love his laugh. It’s not a snicker, the kind I used to hear. I can’t imagine Tonk ever making that unattractive sound. He could never enjoy other people’s pain or embarrassment, especially if he were the cause.
He takes a crinkly-papered bundle from me so I can hold my daughter in one arm. “Thank you for the flowers, Celia,” I smile. “This was very thoughtful of you.” Her eyes focus on
