“Shush.”
“Mom, would let you come in, but she said you look borderline crazy, and she has a strict rule about weapons in the house,” Claire said. The two girls and Sherlock walked around to Claire’s backyard. She had a semi-enclosed patio where they liked to sit when the sun was going down. The sun had already gone down, though, so they walked to the swing set instead. Sherlock bounded up the plastic slide off to the right while Maria and Claire sat down on the swings. They were both too big for them, and Maria’s sheathed sword dragged across the dewy grass.
“So what did you want to talk about, Jack Sparrow?” Claire quipped.
“Jack Sparrow doesn’t have a sword, does he?”
“I don’t know, but you are one eyepatch and metal-hook-for-a-hand away from going full pirate, my friend.”
“Really, you’re so sweet,” Maria said, a fake smile on her face. “When’s Tabby getting here?”
“Should be here any min—”
Near the front of the house, they heard a car door slam shut.
“Looks like right now,” Claire said. “How did Conan the Barbarian not hear the car miles away?”
“Shut up,” Maria said.
Sherlock looked at Maria, thinking she was talking to him.
“Not you, numb-nuts.”
Hey, if you’re gonna insult me, get it right! I can’t have numb nuts if I have NO nuts, because you heartless people sent me to the vet!
“Couldn’t have you humping my stuffed animals and peeing all over the house. We’ve been over this,” Maria said.
“Huh?” Claire asked.
“Oh, nothing. I was talking to Sherlock.”
“Right, almost forgot you could talk to the Bloodhound. Is it all dogs, or just him?”
“So far, unfortunately, just him.”
Sherlock stuck his tongue out at her. Then he went back to trying to snatch fireflies out of the air, his jaw snapping closed wetly, without much luck.
Tabby walked to the backyard. She looked beautiful, dressed in a red blouse and tight jeans. Her lipstick was dark, which made her pale skin seem to glow in the night. “Hey, gals,” she said.
“What are you all dressed up for?” Maria asked.
“Yeah, have a hot date?” Claire echoed and made smooching sounds. Muah, muah, muah, muah!
“Actually, I did. I went to the movies with Cody,” Tabby said. She stood in front of the two girls on the swing set and looked down at her heels, which were also red.
“What!? Cody? No way!” Claire said. “How much did you have to pay him?”
“Boo!” Tabby said. “What, you don’t think I could get that?”
“Not really,” Claire said.
“I do,” Maria said. “You look great, Tabby.” She didn’t care for the banter any longer. She had her own news to drop on her friends, though not as good.
“Thank you, Maria,” Tabby said, eyeing her up and down. “You look…good, too. Sword and all.” Then she looked at Claire and said, “Did I miss a memo? Is there an early Halloween party going on?” The two girls laughed.
Maria just took it. “Very funny. Get it out, get it all out of your systems.”
You look like a pirate’s ass, Sherlock said.
Maria shot him a death stare. “I know magic now, buddy. Watch out.”
Sherlock ignored her and made that weird laughing sound, like a hyena barking.
“Did she just talk to her dog?” Tabby asked. “Well, as if this night couldn’t get any weirder.”
“Told you,” Claire said.
Maria closed her eyes and thought of the vision Duke had shown her. It was enough to send prickles of anger all up and down her body. And in the darkness, her skin glowed blue. Tabby brought a hand to her mouth and gasped. “Whoa, Maria, we need to get you to a hospital.”
“That’s what I said!” Claire said.
“No, you didn’t,” Maria said. “You wanted to call ‘Ripley’s Believe it or Not!’ You don’t care about me, you punk.”
Claire stuck her tongue out.
“Aren’t you worried?” Tabby said. She was walking backward, hand still over her mouth. “What the heck is wrong with you, Maria?”
“It’s who I am,” Maria said. She got up. The light from her skin bathed the green grass in cobalt.
“An alien?” Tabby said.
Maria turned to look at Claire. “See? She got it.”
“Oh, my God, you’re an alien,” Tabby said. “I always thought you were a little weird, Maria, but this is bonkers.”
“Not exactly. It’s a long story, so I’ll sum it up for you, I’m—”
“A witch,” Claire finished. “And…Conan the Barbarian.”
“Don’t make me use this sword.”
Claire stuck her tongue out again, looking like Sherlock…oddly.
“Yes, I’m a witch. It explains a lot,” Maria said.
Tabby was shaking her head. “No, it really doesn’t. If anything, it raises more questions.”
“Yeah, that too,” Maria said. “But forget all of that for a second, okay? I have something important to tell you guys.”
“I think that ship has sailed,” Tabby said. “What could be more important than you being a witchy alien?”
“Oh, no!” Claire said. She rushed over to Maria and put a hand on her belly. “You’re pregnant, aren’t you? I could’ve sworn you were gaining a little weight around the middle.”
Maria slapped Claire’s hand away. “I’m getting closer and closer to using this sword. Don’t make me do it, guys.” She eyed both Tabby and Claire. “No, I’m not pregnant. It’s somehow crazier than that.”
Tabby opened her mouth. Maria cut her off.
“No more guessing. I’ll just freaking tell you. You two are my best friends, okay? So I couldn’t just leave without letting you know. I wanted us to have a proper goodbye.”
“Goodbye?” Tabby said.
Maria nodded.
Get on with it, Sherlock said. All the fireflies caught on to my scheme. They went into hiding.
Maria ignored him. “I’m leaving,” she said.
“Like, where? On a vacation?” Claire asked. She swiped a hand through her hair and took a step forward. “I mean, if you’re going on a vacation, it would be cool if we could all go together.”
“Unless her grandpa is taking her to see the world’s biggest ball of yarn, or spoon, or something weird like that,” Tabby said and laughed.
“I could totally see him taking you
