“Safe?”
“Yeah.” It was Billy’s turn to shiver. “Don’t take it away from me because you’re scared of it.”
“I’m not scared of it.”
“Liar.”
I didn’t want to argue with him. I wanted to kiss him and throw him over my shoulder as if he wasn’t barely a few inches shorter than me. I wanted to carry him upstairs.
I wanted everything.
Billy pulled back enough to look at me. He gripped my chin, and his gaze pierced holes in what little armour I had left. “I want to go upstairs with you and not go to sleep, but before I ask you to fuck me, will you tell me what you did with the dog?”
“What dog?”
“Gus.”
“Saying my name like that isn’t going make me answer that question.”
“Why not?”
“Because you’ve got nothing to worry about.”
“Promise?”
I gave in to the urge to kiss him, a sweet brush of lips that ignited the moment our mouths met. He stumbled back from the force of it, and I pressed him against the wall, kissing him until the need for air forced me to stop.
Breathless, I pressed my forehead to his, brain spinning, but with little conscious thought. I’d tried a hundred times to forget how my body craved him, but it was as impossible as forgetting how my heart cried out for him too, and he remained, as he had all the years since our first kiss, unforgotten. If that was even a word. Maybe I’d ask him later, when I could think straight.
He’d know.
He always did.
I found his hand again, and tangled my fingers with his. “Jessie’s safe, I promise. Don’t ask me any more than that. Just ask me to fuck you before I lose my goddamn mind.”
Billy
I had no idea what he’d done with that damn fucking dog, but as he took me by the hand and led me upstairs, it didn’t matter. His promise meant everything, and the slam of his bedroom door as he kicked it shut quieted the nerves rolling in my belly, shocking them into silence.
He stripped my clothes, and then his own, and it felt like the first time we’d been naked together all over again, except now I saw him with brand-new eyes. His strong body enchanted me, his forearms, biceps, and shoulders. His chest, and cut abdomen.
His. Thick. Thighs.
My gaze drifted to the scars on his knee. They were neater than mine, but I knew the pain behind them, and it hurt my soul to think of him suffering.
So I didn’t think of it. I refocussed on his dick, hard and waiting, and drew a shaky breath.
Gus kissed me again, and the heat between us amped up another notch. His hands were everywhere, and he threw me down on the bed. He covered me with his body and reached over me to the bedside table.
Lube and condoms hit the duvet by my head. A week ago I might’ve flinched, but as I stared at them now, my body thrummed with anticipation. With desire, and need. I wanted this.
I wanted Gus.
He jacked my dick and worked me open with his tongue while I arched my back and begged him for more. I felt like I could come from just that alone, but he was never gonna let me fly that easily. He slipped his fingers inside me, and rose up on his knees to claim my lips. Sensation overcame me. I rode his fingers, and he groaned into my mouth.
I needed to touch him.
My hand flailed around, searching. He caught it and guided me to where I needed to be.
I closed my fingers around his cock. It was thick, long, and heavy. And so fucking hard a rush of adrenaline sent more heat sluicing through my veins.
Nerves returned.
I sucked in a panicked breath.
Gus eased his fingers from me. He thrust into my hand, his dark eyes so molten he could’ve drowned me with his heated gaze. “We can just do this. It’s enough for me, Billy. It always is.”
“I know. But it’s not enough for me.”
“Say it, then. If we’re gonna do this, I need you to say it.”
He never said he needed anything. Never demanded shit from me when, despite my best intentions, I brought him nothing but hassle. This was a dude who was acting like he’d stolen a dog for me. Or for Luke, to keep his hooligan little brother out of trouble. Whatevs. It didn’t matter. The point was he’d done it for everyone except himself. He needed me to tell him I wanted him?
Fuck. How could he not know?
But if he needed me to tell him a thousand times, I was so fucking there.
I released his cock and sat up, getting up in his face until we were nose to nose. “I want you to fuck me. It scares the shit out of me cos last time I said that to someone it didn’t pan out, but I want you, Gus. I fucking need you. Don’t leave me hanging.”
Gus snorted out a laugh. “You think I could? That I could tuck myself in and walk away? Man, you have no idea how hot you are.”
“So tell me.”
“Nah. I’m gonna show you.”
There was no hiding the fact that Gus was stronger than me. He shifted me around and eased me onto my stomach with one leg raised to the side. More lube drizzled onto me, and he rubbed it in with probing fingers that made me squirm and forget that I was splayed open for him, vulnerable and waiting.
His touch was electric. I chased it and spread my legs wider.
Gus played me until I was pushing back on his fingers, desperate for more, then he pulled back. He rolled a condom on and lay over me, inserting himself perfectly between my legs.
His chest hit my back, and he kissed the nape of my neck. “I’m not going to hurt you, I promise.”
I knew that. I reached around and found his hip, guiding him
