He is supposed to be standing guard, not walking around the house. He looks back behind him toward her room, then back to me. I can’t help but see something in his gaze, something unreadable. Instead of demanding what he’s thinking, I wait for him to answer me.
“She’s hungry. Did you know they can’t really eat in their corsets?” he asks.
Pressing my lips together, I try not to laugh. Jeremiah is single, no doubt the only women he’s lain with are soiled doves and they are typically not in their corsets when clients enter their chambers.
“I did. Martha will bring something up in a bit,” I say with a nod. “I will be her guard for the rest of the evening. If I should need to leave her, I’ll get you,” I offer.
He opens his mouth, but snaps his lips closed and dips his chin before he brushes past me. I’m not sure what he wanted to say to me, but he doesn’t say it and it’s probably for the best because I’m not sure I would care much for it right now.
Making my way toward Birdie’s room, I lift my hand and wrap my fingers around the knob, slowly turning it and pushing the door open as I step inside, closing it behind me before I slowly flip the lock into place so that we’re awarded the privacy we need.
“Tell me,” I begin.
She spins around, lifting her hand to her chest and pants a few times as she catches her breath.
“You scared me,” she scolds.
“Did you wish it to be Jeremiah?” I ask.
Her eyes find mine and she doesn’t even attempt to hide her desires. She did wish it was him and not me.
“He was supposed to send Martha in,” she snaps.
I hum, staying in my spot, unmoving even though I want to rush her and demand that she only wishes for me and no other person in her life, in front of her and at her side. I’m selfish and I know that I am, more so when it comes to her, her attentions, and especially her affections.
“Tell me who your sisters are. Their names?” I ask, refusing to continue the dialogue about Jeremiah and Martha. She will not get either of them tonight, or any other night, she will always only ever get me.
She blinks, pressing her lips together, then clears her throat. “In order or just their names in no particular order?”
Arching a brow, I don’t dignify her question with a response. She lets out a frustrated sigh and sinks down on the edge of the bed as I continue to stand at the end of the bed and watch her, waiting for her to speak to me.
“Drusilla is my little sister,” she begins on a sigh. “Then there is Sybilla, who is older than me, but Liv is the oldest, why?”
My heart stops beating in my chest. My entire body freezes, my muscles tightening. Her sisters. They are here, at least two of them are and they’re married to kings. The prophecy, it’s true.
“Colt?” she asks.
“Why don’t you call me Colton?” I demand out of the blue.
I don’t know why I’ve suddenly found this curious, but she hasn’t called me Colton at all. It’s my name and how I introduced myself to her. She said it a couple times when I first met her, but hasn’t ever again.
“Does it matter?” she asks, her voice soft and low. “Why are you asking me about my sisters?”
I should answer her, I know that I should. She would be happy to know that they are here in this world and that they are safe, that they are queens. I don’t tell her any of that though, not yet at least.
“It matters to me. Why don’t you use my full name?” I don’t want her to, I very much like that she calls me Colt. It helps to ensure that she doesn’t remind me of Adelaide, who always, no matter what called me Colton.
“She called you Colton,” she whispers as if she’s reading my mind.
My entire torso jerks back and my gaze flicks down to meet hers. “Birdie?”
Her next move surprises me and fills me with rage all at the same time. I watch as she reaches for the night table next to her bed, tugging on the handle. When she reaches inside, my breath completely halts and I look down in horror at the leather-bound notebook that is in her hand.
“I didn’t know what it was. Then, I was too curious to stop myself. I should have told you earlier. She called you Colton. I just couldn’t do that, not after you had already told me how guilty you felt and how much you truly loved her.”
I’m not sure what to do, what to say. I have never been frozen and speechless this way before. Instead of saying something that I know I’ll regret, I turn around and walk out of the room, slamming the door behind me before I go in search of Jeremiah and Martha.
After giving them instructions, I make my way toward Lonesable and I mount him, leaving the house, the men, and Birdie behind.
I don’t know what to do, but I need to breathe. She knows. She’s known about what happened to Adelaide, what happened to our daughter. She knows that I did not protect them, that they were harmed in the worst possible ways and I was not there for them.
She knows that I am not capable and that I am probably not the man that this prophecy is meant for, there is someone else for her somewhere, but it is not me. She knows that I am worthless.
Chapter Twenty-Two
BIRDIE
I try really hard not to cry. Martha senses something is wrong and thankfully, she doesn’t ask, sensing that I am not in the position to discuss what has happened. She quietly helps me out of
