He sighed.
“But all that said, I do know that you’re something else, Kelly. I have some shit to figure out in the head, but…if anyone is ever going to make me break fucking rule three, I guess it would be someone with whom I’ve already broken that rule.”
“Rule three?” I asked, a curious smile on my face as I could already take a pretty good guess at what he meant.
“Agency secret,” he said, “and that’s going to be my answer for most everything that you happen to ask. So pick your questions carefully.”
I playfully groaned. I was curious about his work, but if I wanted to read about spy thrillers and espionage, I could just read some James Patterson or watch some Mission Impossible. He didn’t have to tell me everything about his work, though as I spent more time around him, I found myself wanting to know more about him.
“Well, if I had a third rule, it would be that amazing things can come out of bad situations,” I said, “and if the bad situation here is you being in the line of duty and the good things is us being, well, something, I think it’s at least worth a try.”
Liam leaned back, folded his hands over his knee, and took a deep breath.
“Yep,” he said, “I just don’t know what that looks like yet.”
For something that he said with remarkable calm, it was amazing how much relief I felt upon hearing him speak. Even if we tried this and failed, it was so much better knowing that Charlotte’s father had made every attempt to be a part of her life. And, more than that, we had made a real attempt at being a couple.
It was too early to say, though I certainly had eyes for him and a heart that craved his presence. But it wasn’t too early to say we had a chance I never imagined getting two years ago.
“Give it time,” I said. “Even if you just disappear one day, it’ll be better for Charlotte to have known she had a father who cared and met than not.”
Liam gave no obvious reaction to that. He didn’t gasp, he didn’t clutch at his heart, he didn’t tear up—not that he would have done any of those things, anyway. And yet, there was a certain vibe, a certain softness that I felt coming from him, that seemed to suggest the words had touched him like his had touched mine. Funny how relationships worked like that—words meant to be kind but more or less just fill the space could be so powerful and so touching in a moment.
“Makes sense.”
Liam’s voice wasn’t cracking, but it was on the quieter side. He opened his mouth to say more, but nothing came out. I appreciated the moment so much—it only reinforced what I felt about Liam with Charlotte.
“And look, if we don’t work out, I’d still love for you to be a part of Charlotte’s life. Maybe you see her on weekends, or maybe whenever you’re not out on call. I don’t know the particulars, but we have time.
“And about us.”
I gulped. What the hell could I say about us? Like, seriously, what could be said for us in the moment that made a lick of sense?
Nothing, that’s what.
“I really didn’t expect to have to think about this,” I said with a laugh. “A week ago, I just wanted to find Charlotte’s father. I figured he’d be some guy living in another small town nearby, he’d want to talk to Charlotte, but that I wouldn’t find him attractive.”
Liam laughed. Like, actually, really laughed. He wasn’t the most expressive person in the world, but I figured he needed something to relieve whatever he was feeling.
“It’s true. But…”
“You’re going in circles now,” Liam said.
And then he did the sweetest thing. He leaned forward and kissed me. It was a bit of a rough kiss, but it wasn’t an erotic kiss. It was a kiss that basically said, “Hush, enjoy what’s going on and stop worrying.”
“We’ll let time be the deciding factor for that,” he said. “In the meantime, let me have my little girl for a second. I can’t be staying long.”
“How long is long?”
“I should be leaving now to watch Emily. I’m not leaving without holding my daughter, though.”
I didn’t want to say I’d forgotten about Emily while getting swept up in this conversation about us, but it certainly had left the forefront of my mind. The power of Liam, I suppose.
“One second.”
I lifted Charlotte out of her seat and handed her to Liam. I took leave, giving him a private moment but also me some space to think. He was really going to give this a shot. Years after my only marriage had failed, years after the supposedly happily ever after had turned out to be a veil that fell off…I was going to get a second chance.
If you’d told me that the day I moved to Breckenridge, I doubt I would have welcomed it. Love was too painful, too unfulfilling. Sure, sex was great, money was great, a nice house was great…but a big house wasn’t needed for two people. It sure wasn’t needed for two people that couldn’t ever have kids.
Even now, old fears rose up. Sure, it was easy—well, it happened to be easy—to get pregnant when it was a one-night stand. What happened if you wanted a sibling for Charlotte, and the old problems and difficulties popped back up? What would happen if the sense of discontent came back? What if it was all me?
Worry about that later. Charlotte needs to see her father.
When I returned to take
